- 7 years ago
- Wedding: April 2011
Sadly, I’m realizing several close family members, including my one and only sister, are questioning WHY we’re planning a small wedding. I’ve heard comments such as, “Oh,um I’m really surprised you are planning a formal wedding….and “Why don’t you just go to the courthouse or elope?”…or “I certainly don’t know why you want something so traditional.”
(BTW~My family genuinely likes my FI. Thankfully this is not at issue.)
I’ve explained we want a wedding,but several have said,”Why are you causing stress? You are making stress for us all!”
A few have said,”Remember your 1st wedding and how much drama and stress it brought?!” REALLY? Well gee, thanks for the painful reminder, but do try to remember I was 18 then and EVERYONE on BOTH sides was barking orders at me!
I explained I’m happy,and not stressed. I think of planning and preparing for a wedding like getting ready for the arrival of a new baby. Maybe to some planning for a wedding or any event just freaks them out.
Having a wedding for us is a way to help us in our fresh start for our new life together. We both were cheated on and had nightmare divorces. (His court drama went on for 3 yrs…mine will be final in a few weeks after a 2 yr. battle.)
We both want our special day and are planning a simple, relaxed celebration, that he wants as much as I do…regardless of what one female relative claimed about men not being interested in all the fuss of a wedding…sigh!
I’ve asked some relatives if they received a wedding invitation from us if that would cause them stress. Most said,”No, of course not because it’s fun being a guest”. A few said,”Well yes, actually because we have to buy a gift, get dressed up, find the place and fight traffic….blah,blah,blah…”
My mother and other friends and family members have been strongly urging us to register for gifts, but after hearing these opinions I am re-thinking the registry thing. I don’t want anyone to accuse us of having a wedding as a way to get gifts. However, we do have items we need. We both gave in to our ex’s and let them have possessions just to end the court room stress!
Any other Bee’s dealing with any of this stuff? It’s really getting me down and sucking out the joy! We’ve even considered eloping,but we really want our special day with loved ones.