Post # 1
I wasn’t sure where to post it. I am not really devastated to put it into “Emotional” section, but I am pretty upset.
I always thought that the groom will see me for the first time on the wedding day walking down the aisle. I had this beautiful picture in my head where I am in white – smiling, maybe tearing up a little – slowly walking towards him and he’s standing in the front mesmerized by seeing me in my wedding dress for the first time.
Well, that is not going to happen. I realized that a few days ago and after we met with the photographer last night and tried to come up with a good plan, the only one that works is doing pictures before the ceremony. That means doing a “First Look” photos and him seeing me before I walk down the aisle.
I am trying to justify it in my head that it’ll still be only on our wedding day. I am also planning on wearing a long veil for the ceremony, so for the pictures before I’d be wearing a short birdcage veil and it means that I’d still look different walking down the aisle.
I accepted it already. I am just upset that my beautiful vision is not going to happen 🙁
Post # 3
why is a first look the only plan that works? is your photographer worried about sunset?
Post # 4
@Imagelicious: Why? Is it a timing issue? If you want to have that moment then make it happen. Can you push your ceremony back?
Post # 5
From what Ive heard, everyone who has done a first look has loved it and it is some of their favorite pictures from the day. I bet you are worried now but then will love it once it happens!
Post # 6
I am sorry that you are not getting your vision.
Is there no way of working in all your pictures between the ceremony and the reception?
I must admit; however, that I did do a first look and it was my most favourite part of our wedding day. And it definitely didn’t take away from the moment when I walked down the aisle. I still got butterflies, I was smiling ear to ear (thought I would cry but I was smiling so much I couldn’t), and I didn’t take my eyes off my groom who was staring back at me in awe.
If there is no way of changing your schedule maybe you can look at the positive side and now you get to organize a fun first look!
Post # 7
You can do it!! I’m in the SAME EXACT BOAT as you. I envisioned the first time the same way – walking down the isle and him looking at me from a far. Well … we must’ve miscalculated the timing of our wedding because by the time our ceremony finishes, it will be dark and we won’t be able to get any good pictures of us (and the bridal party) on the beach during day light hours. 🙁
Invitations were already printed – it was a sad fact we just had to face. So, I figured, if I don’t have a choice …I might as well make the best out of it! And that’s what I’ve done! It devasting him more than me, but still, we had to take a moment of silence for our loss. Then … we started looking up photos from “the first look” and we couldn’t believe it, its so sensual!!!! The more we looked at, the more we imagined ourselves doing it, and more we started to tear up. Now we’re actually excited for it!
Don’t get me wrong, wish I could have it the other way. I had my timeline set up; everything was done. Now I have to be in my dress longer, run around longer, and hope I don’t get burnt out by the end. (I’m hoping adrenaline will kick in halfway through the reception during “the chance” lol) But, hang in there … you’ll be surprised at how many great photos you’ll get and how awesome that “first look” will be. 🙂
Post # 8
Maybe you could try to think of it in a positive way. Your husband will still be seeing you for the first time on your wedding day, but you’ll just be walking somewhere else instead of down the aisle. You’ll still get to see the look of surprise and happiness when he sees you the first time, and it can be a wonderful private moment. I asked my husband if having a first look took away from the experience of watching me walk down the aisle, and he said it didn’t. He still looked teary, and I still looked really happy, even though we’d already seen each other.
Post # 9
Our first look were my least favourite, but we did all of our pictures beforehand. It might have been different if it was when I was actually walking down the aisle.
Post # 10
The wedding is about 1.5 hour away from the city and although some people will be coming a day before, a lot of the guests will be driving on that day. We are having a Brunch reception from 12 to 4pm. The ceremony is 10.30-11.00 at a vinyard about 10 min drive from the reception location. There’s only about 30 min between ceremony (after hugs) and reception to take photos and it’s not enough at all. The photographer recommends at least an hour for the two of us and an hour and another half an hour for family and friends.
FI is against moving the ceremony to earlier time. That’s basically the only thing he feels strongly about regarding this wedding, so I want to respect his wish.
We talked about doing photos after the ceremony, but it would mean I need to have my makeup and possible hair redone.
Post # 11
If I were you I would try to work something out. Your disappointment will probably reflect in your photos. People who do first looks WANT to do first looks. If I had my heart set on a certain vision and it wasn’t going to work out, I would be upset.
You never know. You might end up loving the photos and it may be your favorite part of the day.
I would try to sit down with FI and ask him why you can’t push it back an hour or so. Are you having a cocktail hour? Maybe you can do pictures with just your bridal party and some formal photos before the ceremony while he does the same with the groomsmen and then have time to do more photos after the ceremony.
Post # 12
The “first look” was hands down the BEST thing we decided to do for our wedding! I was the one who suggested it and my husband wasn’t totally on board until I explained what it was, exactly. When it was all said and done, he still talks about how he doesn’t even know how he would have gotten through the day if we hadn’t done that first.
We arranged it so it was just us and the photographers and took that time to exchange our gifts to each other. I love all the pictures that came out fo that totally natural moment. We weren’t posing, just spending a few minutes alone with each other.
Post # 13
Hopefully, this will give you another perspective. We had first look pictures and I really enjoyed them a lot. We have a lot of pictures of just the two of us and were still around for the entire wedding reception + cocktail hour. That said, I still cried the whole way walking down the aisle, as did my groom. For me, the first look did not take anything away the walk down the aisle.
Post # 14
If it’s really important to you, try your best to work around it. Maybe you could take pictures after your reception? Is there any way you could start the first 30 min of your reception without you guys (is there any sort of leeway on cocktail hour?)? I’m sorry this isn’t working out the way you planned!
We chose to do a first look mostly for timing reasons. We did all the pictures except some family shots before the wedding, and it allowed us to spend more time with our guests and at our reception. I actually liked the first look better as it was a little more private, and allowed us some time to be with each other before the craziness started. Plus it calmed our nerves a bit! I don’t felt that it made our seeing each other during the aisle walk any less special.
Post # 15
We planned to do the First Look. In the craziness of the day it was so nice to have a moment just the two of us. And our photographers. 😀
I and my husband who was hesitant at first loved doing the first look.
If you are set on him seeing you for the first time walking down the aisle then rework your schedule if it means so much.
You won’t necessarily have to redo your makeup.
I had my hair & make up done at 8am in the morning and our ceremony was at 530. I had lipstick and lip gloss for touchup but my makeup was totally fine! But then I went with the light natural makeup look. Have you done a trial to test how long your makeup will last?
ETA: We saw each other the morning of for the traditional groom pick up bride. Was in the limo together. I went to change into my white gown, did the first look. None of that took away from the awesome feeling that is walking down the aisle to your husband. Nothing.
Post # 16
Aw, try not to be too bummed. We did the first look as well and it was truly a magical moment because it was just him and me. Very emotional as well. It was one of the best moments of the day for me. And the video and photos that captured it, for me, are amazing. Once we got to the ceremony/reception venue, we separated again and it was another hour until I walked down the aisle. Which, by the way, was awesome too.