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Disappointed with wedding photos...

posted 11 months ago in Beehive

I don't know how to deal with this, and so I thought I'd take it to the board! Last week, my husband and I were finally able to see our wedding photos, and I'm really rather disappointed in them.

We were looking for a more photojournalistic style, with only a few posed photos of the family occuring right after the ceremony. The posed photos happened...all is fine there. The ones of my family in particular aren't stellar, but there were 19 of us trying to pull ourselves together for them, and 9 of them were kids. We were bound to wind up with issues in them, really.

But the photojournalistic thing, it...just didn't happen, it seems! I mean, there are a few photos that turned out fun and neat, but out of hundreds, there are only a FEW that I like? They took pictures of the FOOD at the cocktail reception, for heaven's sake. WTH is up with that? The photos of us dancing during our first dance are admittedly fabulous. I couldn't be happier with them. But the photos of the people milling about at the party, or even during the ceremony...they just aren't there. The ones of people at tables and people on the deck outside of the reception area look like photos I would take with my crappy digital camera...they're random and not photojournalistic in any sense of the word. They seemed to take a lot of pictures of peoples' backs.

I don't think I'm being too picky. I don't think I am, but I guess I can't be too sure. I looked at the photog's work online and in studio before commiting to them as our choice. I took in examples of what I didn't want and what I loved. I thought I'd done well with the choosing, and now I'm sad and don't know how to deal with it.

Anyone else go through this kind of thing after seeing their photos for the first time? It's been a week, and I haven't looked at them since last Friday, they make me so sad to even glance at. It doesn't help much that I didn't like my makeup in any of the photos, and in some of the close-up ones of me getting ready, it was extremely obvious that the fake eyelashes I had on my left eye were falling off. Why didn't the photog SAY anything? After looking at the photos, they clearly had the best view of it as it occurred, and now I have a bunch of photos that look like I have a lazy eye going on. (We fixed the eyelash after I was done, and the outer corner had completely popped off my eyelid all together! If I could go back and change anything that day, it would be to leave those darned things off my face for the day. They were a poor decision, and I'm still trying to get over that and it's been almost 2 months!)

I have issues, I know. But let me know if this is a feeling that might pass, if you've experienced it. I don't know how to deal with it right now.

posted by Faithsista 21 posts 11 months ago

I'd recommend contacting friends and family to see if anyone else took photos that day. You could get some good candids that way. There's not much else you can do about the lack of pretty crowd shots.

As for the "lazy eye" thing, that could possibly be fixed with Photoshop. I do it all the time, it's really easy.

Just remember, you DO have some good pictures, and in 20 years you'll still have your memories, even if you don't have artistically framed candids!

posted by tanya2s 276 posts 11 months ago

My SIL felt the same way when she initially got her pics back but as time progressed she loved looking at her pics and loves them now!

 So sorry you weren't blown away.....did the photog not live up to the samples he showed when you booked him?

posted by erika426 107 posts 11 months ago

More time will allow you to love them more. Even two months after your wedding you are still too close to it to really appreciate the moments that might be present in the pictures. Your reaction is also colored by your own dissapointments with the day (the eyelashes for example) that are, of course, present in the pictures.  With time you'll appreciate that these are just part of the story.  It might help to sit down and look thru them with a friend who doesn't have the emotional attachment you do, who will be able to notice and point out things you aren't seeing now. 


As a pro photog myself, I can guarantee you that your photog didn't notice your falling eyelash. Very rarely am I looking thru the lens and noticing things like that. I'm looking at overall composition, light, focus.  They might be able to touch up the photos to make it less obvious however - it would be worth an inquiry. 

Not having more pj style work when that is what you had clearly discussed and agreed on is a valid complaint however. If you were wanting more of a "telling the story of your day" approach, you may be missing some things here that you had reasonably expected. Set up a Kodak gallery account and let your friends and relatives in on the password and account name so they can upload what they have. You might find some real gems there.  It is also possible that with some cropping your pictures could be adjusted to something more like what you wanted. Though it is hard to say with out seeing them.  Another question is did you get the photographer (actual person) who's work you liked when you booked?  Sometimes the main photog's work is shown but the associates aren't always capable of that level on the job. 




posted by mthree 21 posts 11 months ago

I'm sorry you're disappointed with your images.  Like the pp's said, it's hard to judge without seeing them, but one of the things that is important before hiring someone is to see a few complete days of other couples (not just their best images they have on-line or in a portfolio).  This way you'll get a sense of their overall style and consistency throughout an entire wedding. 

You also might have had really high expectations of your images -- they are there to document your day but can't create images that aren't there.  Would you be willing to share some proofs with us?  I agree that over time you'll be happier with them.  You don't need 2000 amazing images, you just need enough to frame, give to family and make an album with.  You could make a beautiful album with just 40 images. 

And I think it's great they took pictures of the food at the cocktail hour -- that's part of the day and you wanted "photojournalistic."  What does your husband have to say about all this?  Is he disappointed too?

posted by onion 51 posts 11 months ago

If it helps, every one of my friends that have gotten married recently have hated their pictures at first but after a fews weeks ended up loving them. I think it has something to do with the massive amount of photos you have to look at!  They are bound to be at least an equal amount of "bad" and "good" pics when you have over 800 of them!  And if you are anything like me, you tend to focus more on the bad then on the good. My advise based on my friends experience is to go through the photos again and separate them into piles of "hate" "like" and "love".  Then actually start to put together your wedding album (so easy if they are online!).  Chances are if you see all the good pictures one after another, without any "bad" ones thrown in, you might end up liking them!

posted by jcabc 103 posts 11 months ago

I'd have to echo all of the sentiments of everyone else... it is disappointing to have your pictures not turn out how you thought you wanted them.  But I think that you will grow to love them more and more!  One thing you could do, is grab your fella and do a Bridal Session/Trash the Dress session to make up for the make-up that you were unhappy with and change it up a little this time to get some more pictures that you love.  Maybe do this with the same photographer or a different one?  On the bright side, it sounds like you had a fabulous, beautiful, and meaningful wedding day, and if you so, I'm sure have at least some equally fabulous pictures that reflect those moments.

posted by Buckeye 25 posts 11 months ago

I didn't love my photos right away.  In fact I hired my photog way ahead of time and then afterwards was exposed to much better, more artistic albeit more expensive photogs.  I shrugged it off and hoped for the best.  When my photos came, I thought it was good but it wasn't exceptional... I was a bit dissapointed, but then I let it go, sat on it for a few days, came back and looked at it again, and started loving it.  I have no regrets now.  Hope you will get through it and change your mind.  =)

Another option, is to take more professional photos!  Hire a different photographer for an hour or so.  Shoot in a more casual setting such as the beach, park, etc and take fun shots of you and your husband in your wedding gown.  It's not the same as your wedding day, but you still have a chance to capture the way you look now in your outfits.  If he already sent his tux back then have him wear something more casual and fun like a button down shirt with slacks. 

posted by violet 34 posts 11 months ago

I wasn't crazy about my photos at first.

Part of it is because I am a huge photography buff (trying to get into the wedding photography business myself), and we had a limited budget for our wedding, so we could only spend $1,000 on photos.  Sometimes I get a tad jealous when I look at some of the wedding photos the bees post and mine aren't as amazing.

But now I realize that I may not have incredibly beautiful pieces of art, but I have photos that accurately represent my day.  Make a file on your computer of just the ones you love -- the bad ones will detract from the good ones.   I have some that I absolutely love, and that's all anyone really needs - its great that your first dance photos turned out fabulous!  50 years from now - those are the ones you will care about, not ones of people milling around.

I second everyone else - do a fun photo shoot with your hubby in your wedding dress with a photographer you love!

posted by loveletter 44 posts 11 months ago

A general rule for photography is that 10 percent will be "great" and 5% will be "amazing" which means that you can expect 85% of them to be less than perfect. If the photographer took 800 photos, there should be about 120 in there that you really really love. Try to focus on those - they take so many because they expect that a lot will be imperfect. Like others have said, you can probably redeem some of those anyway with some photoshopping and cropping.

posted by snmcdowell 467 posts 11 months ago

I feel ya, I really do. My pictures were disappointing, but the feeling does fade. We picked some with potential and photoshopped the hell out 'em, with pretty good results. I do get envious when I look at the beautiful shots from these amazing, elegant weddings, but then I remember--that is not the wedding I had! ($ small budget $, small wedding, etc.) I agree with everyone, in time you will appreciate the nice shots you do have, as they represent YOUR day. Comparisons will matter less. 

The finality is hard to deal with, because even a ttd session won't eradicate some of your issues with the (lack of) pj style concerning your guests, but maybe it will help you with other feelings of regret. I plan on doing a newlywed shoot to assuage my disappointment with my hair, makeup, etc. Good luck. I bet time will alter your perpective. :)

posted by ceche07 11 posts 11 months ago

Oh hun I'm so sorry you don't like them, but I think I might be able to help a little.

What it sounds like you want can actually be added to the photos now, there are tricks and techniques that you can use in photoshop and other professioanl photo editing softwear that I'm sure your photographer has, and they can give them more of the "edgy" feel. (sounds liek everyone else suggested that too now that I look over the other posts more closely...lol)

Also snmcdowell is right, 1 out of every 10 is usable. Now you're photographer should have went through your stuff and pulled out uneeded photos, and only presented you with the most outstanding of them. I think that shooting hundreds and then laying them all out in front of you, good and bad is not only very overwhelming but a bit unprofessional. Part of their job is to determin which to give their client, you know?  

I would express your feelings to the photographer and tell them that they shoulnd't have presented the photos to you if they weren't ready. Is there photo journalistic shots on their web site? Maybe use those as explamples and find other sites so they know what you're talking about. 

Hang in there -

Amber 

posted by Sweeney2Be 1,488 posts 11 months ago

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"A general rule for photography is that 10 percent will be "great" and 5% will be "amazing" which means that you can expect 85% of them to be less than perfect." I have to agree - at first I was really letdown when looking at our pics.

We had a tight budget for our PJ-style photog and only had 3.5 months to put the wedding together. We loved his work, price point and the fact he brought an assistant day-of that helped with lighting and extra camera angles throughout. (Did I mention he threw in a free e-session?) I was initially disappointed because the static items I wanted to include in our album (invite, programs, menus and yes special food & drink, etc.) were not included. Hardly any candid shots but then again we had a small daytime wedding with mostly family and hardly anyone danced.

The more we look over the pictures, the more we like them. The lighting, focus and beautiful scenery plus us looking/feeling gorgeous all lended themselves to great pics.

Give yourself some time and try not to compare your results to those that may have had photog budgets higher than yours - "picture envy" will be your worst nightmare.

posted by christigpa 84 posts 11 months ago

My experience has been similar to a lot of the previous posters.  My photographer is a photojournalist-type too.  We had very few posed pictures so there are very few "perfect" shots.  And we have so many and there are so many "imperfect" ones that the really great ones took a while to pop out at us.  I am still trying to figure it out and we've had the photos for a couple of weeks. 

For what it's worth, what has helped me is to organize them on my blog in chronological order and kind of separate the better ones from the bunch and then go from there.  As I have been working on that a few are really jumping out at me as the ones I want to have displayed or to give as gifts.  Also, I am looking forward to having our families peruse the proof books with us to to get there objective view point.

I hope you feel happier about them as you get more familiar with them, Faithsista!  If it helps, you can take a peek at the ones I've posted so far.  Myabe it would help to see someone elses?  I have a link to my blog in my profile.   

Keep us posted!

posted by maverika 42 posts 11 months ago

Thanks for the responses, everyone! First off, I would LOVE to share some of the photos with you to give you an example of what I'm having the hardest time with, but the photos are copywritten and not right-clickable or shareable in any way, unfortunately. And linking to the album on the photog's website isn't a good idea, as it's listed under mine and hubby's last names. And I prefer to remain anonymous online. (I'm a pain like that. :))

The ones of my lazy eyelashes are rightupclose to the face...I don't know how the photog missed it, mthree. But then again, there were 3 other women in the room that should have noticed it just from looking at my face. I couldn't feel it, and I wasn't close to a mirror, so I was oblivious. I guess I just assumed that if the shot was so close up, the photog that was taking it would be able to see it. The fact that it stayed in the slideshow the photog presented to us as a final package of photos to choose from for our album was probably a mistake on her part. She thought I wanted all the zany, unusual photos she took. And in the case of my new brother-in-law's antics, she couldn't have been more right! (Photos with him in them made me very happy...he's so funny!) But in the case of me trying to be pretty, and having a lovely, hard-to-get cityscape behind me in the photo turning out to be a completely awful photo of me on my wedding day? NOT what I wanted to see.

The studio does have a "favorites" function within the online viewing section, and I started using it last week to pull all my favorites together, which helped a bit. But it was so disheartening to see so many weird photos (again, the food at the cocktail reception? I'm talking a pot full of meatballs and a bowl of tortilla chips, you guys...very odd) and missing some of the ones that I would have prefered, I guess.

Oh, and I already received all the photos I'm gonna get from family and friends, it seems. Some of them were great, but there weren't a lot. We were all too busy partying! (Plus, I warned them ahead of time that the photog would prefer for them not to take photos, if they could avoid it. I'm pretty mad that I did that at this point, but what're ya gonna do?)

We're planning on doing another shoot maybe sometime in Spring or for our anniversary in fall next year, so hopefully that will help. We paid a LOT for our photog. A hell of a lot. And I did review her specific books to see what she'd done for weddings before, so I thought I was picking the right person, really. Maybe the cropping and editing thing will work in our favor. I really liked her and working with her and everything, so I've been trying to stay positive. But when I specifically told her things like "no pictures on an angle" and "try to avoid posed photos" and then found that we were being directed into certain poses and now see that several of the photos are on an angle (hate, hate, HATE!), it's been tough to deal with.

I'll go back to trying to focus on the positives about them, though. Thanks again all! Sorry for my novella posts!

posted by Faithsista 21 posts 11 months ago

out of curiosity, where is your photographer located?  i understand if you don't want to give her name, but it sounds awfully similar to mine (with the angled pictures, etc).

posted by aha106 13 posts 11 months ago

I live in Kansas City. And they aren't alone in the angled photo phenomenon. Just look at any photog's website, or an already married Knottie bio. The angle thing is a big deal right now. And while I can appreciate it in certain cases (in one of the photos taken of me and my husband, there was an object behind us that she wanted to get in the shot, which I can understand...and it looks ok in that case), random up-close shots of my head on an angle don't look artsy or cool to me...they make me nauseous,

Another thing that's kind of popular right now, I've noticed, is the bride and groom getting wrapped up in some way in the bride's veil. I hate that, too. We didn't do that at all, though, so she listened to me there!

posted by Faithsista 21 posts 11 months ago

THIS HAPPENED TO ME...  I had the best day of my life, and about two weeks later my photographer put our pics online, and I HATED THEM... I liked maybe five pictures out of five hundred.  We researched and spent $3K on a photog - I still don't think that he was worth $3K, but I am finally happy with our photos. 

Yeah he did miss some of the specific shots I asked for (rings in the bouquet, boys argyle socks, etc.), and my necklace was crooked in EVERY picture... but I have come to really like more and more of the photos that he took at our wedding.  I am happy that he is fine with me incorporating pictures taken by friends and family into my flush mounted album. 

Give it a couple more weeks, go on your honeymoon, and by the time you get back you just might love more and more of the pictures.

 

posted by karianne 25 posts 11 months ago

Time...it is the only answer to your quandry. 


My caterer screwed up a very special dish at our wedding - one I was really looking forward to and had told everyone about.  It has been seven months and I'm still a little miffed about it - but not so much that it is one of the first things I think about when I think of our wedding anymore, which I used to. 

It just takes time. 

And your angled photos might be able to be re-cropped straight (difficult to judge without seeing them of course).  

posted by mthree 21 posts 11 months ago

That's what I was hoping mthree. Thankfully, my husband studied photography in college (it was his major, actually), and he and the photog talk shop very well together about cropping photos and that sort of thing. I asked him last night if he thought that we might be able to crop some of them so they have a more P.J. feel to them like we wanted, and he said it's probably doable.

Karianne, we actually got married almost 2 months ago, and had our honeymoon and all that. The photos took quite some time to pull together, so we didn't see them for the first time until last week.

Thanks again, everyone. I'm feeling a lot better about this already. After hitting my thank you notes for a little while, I might go back to favoriting the photos on the website. Happy holidays to you all!

posted by Faithsista 21 posts 11 months ago

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