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We didn't do anything particularly crazy so yea, we talked about it.
Mine was probably crazier than his and we just had a party at a friends house where I got a bunch of lingerie and we talked about dresses, weddings, men, and ate and drank, lol.
He went to a baseball game with his guys and had a fun time. His entourage included 3 pastors, 1 ethics professor, my dad, and 3 boys under 13 so I knew they weren't gonna go too crazy, lol.
Having a girls weekend out of town. Plan to have good food, good chats and some dancing. He's well aware...
Poor FH, not sure what he's going to do since his BM isn't a planner AT ALL. Probably won't be much, but hopefully he does get to do something. He'd tell me anything...
If you are concerned, agree on boundaries and have a little faith.
@hecallsmelove: I agree, if there's any concern, I would talk to your FI and if possible without seeming too naggy with him BM and/or BM's significant other.
We've talked. And our conclusion? We might be having a joint party. :) Turns out we had the same idea of what constitutes an awesome time. Now, if we were separate we'd probably make sure we still understood the boundaries and I'm sure we'd still know what the other was doing.
My FH's party was planned by his mates, I knew a couple of details but nothing else. It didn't really bother me. Mine was planned partly by me with my BMs, it was pretty low key so FH knew most of it too. We didn't exactly discuss it, but we didn't keep it secret either.
We chatted at the beginning, and ultimately decided to do a Jack & Jill in Vegas.
I was honest with him about not loving the idea of a night of debauchery with strippers, and told him what my comfort level was. I used to work in a bar that was often the first stop for bachelor parties, and it made me sick the stories that the guys would tell me - especially the day after! He wasn't worried about what I was going to get up to since he knows male strippers repulse me and I would be livid if my friends planned that ;)
So in the end, we both wanted fun parties, music and dancing. Since most of our friends are either dating or shared friends, it made sense to do it together.
There's a big event going on when we're there, and we all bought tickets, and are staying at the same hotel. Apart from that, we're aiming to stay separate as much as possible, no shared rooms, get ready separate, separate dinners etc. so that the boys can be boys and we can be girly!
The best man actually facebooked me beforehand and let me know what we be going down at the bachelor party :). I didn't ask him or anything, he just volunteered it! But once it was over, we talked about it, just like we always talk about fun nights out with our friends.
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Did you or will you and your FI discuss your plans for your respective parties?