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Sure, it's not ideal, but it's more important that those people are there to celebrate with you than it is to have the perfect room configuration. I'm with your FI on this one—I wouldn't separate dancing from dinner, and I'd try to seat in the adjoining room friends and people who won't take offense. :)
I don't know about putting the friends in the other room. Maybe older people who would want to be away from the dance floor or families with children.
Can you include tables on the dance floor and then move them when the dancing begins so everyone can fit in one room? I've been to a wedding where that was done and it worked out fine.
I'd be upset if I were in a separate room - it would feel like second class dining!
We did this. We didn't have dancing, but it was more of a weather issue for us. It was really cold outside and not all of the heaters were working, so they said it would be warm enough for half the guests outside and half inside, with the door open inbetween so people could still go and mingle with eachother easily. We put the older guests indoors b/c we figured younger people will be happier to deal with a little cold. I've always heard it's a big no no to do this, but sometimes you don't have much choice. And really, I don't think anybody really cared.
at our venue, when we first did a tour of the hall, we noticed that there were two separate rooms. as much as i loved the place, my first reaction was "no way could i choose who goes in what room and to separate them from the rest." i then found out that the wall opened to the other room. since you don't have that option, i would put the dance floor in there. people will all eat together at the same time, but during the dancing, most people will be up and mingling and i dont think having the dance floor in the adjoining room will be of concern at all.
We had basically 3 rooms sort of separated. The main dining room with the dance floor, a side dining room with opened french doors (clearly a separate room) and then the bar with 3 tables in that area. I dont think anyone had a problem with this. We put all of our bridal party in the main room with close friends and our parents and families. Then in the side room we put a table of people that had babies, a table of family friends and a table of aunts/uncles. In the bar area we put a table of younger cousins, aunts/uncles and DHs college friends. I think it worked out really well!
I would absolutely seat everyone together. I'd feel like I was second class / B-list / etc if I was seated in a separate room. Those people aren't going to be able to see and be a part of things.
I voted for putting everyone in one room to eat dinner. I went to a wedding last year where guests dined in 2 different rooms. In one room was the immediate family, older people, the wedding party, and friends of the parents, and the cake and dance floor. In the other room, through a french door just like yours, were the younger people (the friends/cousins etc of the bride and groom). Even though there was a sizeable number of people in the second room, about 40% of the guests, we all felt totally out of the loop. We had to get up and stand in a cramped fashion around the wall in the other room for all the toasts, the first dances, cake cutting, etc. It also made the wedding less of a dance party, because all the younger people who would get the party going were in the room without the dance floor. I love the couple and had a great meal, but the separation of the seating made the whole night feel off. So my advice is definitely don't separate the tables!!!
I would definitely avoid having guests slpit up into two different rooms.
I went to a wedding where family was in the main room with the bride and groom, and most friends were seated out on the patio. I felt a really removed from all the action (toasts, announcement, hearing tables called for dinner, first dance, etc).
I vote for keeping all the dinner stuff in one room and dancing in another.
We had this at our venue and they told us the outsider guests always seem like their second class. If you have to I'd but friends and keep family inside but I do like having the dancing in the main room too. I would ask your venue whats normally done.
My brother did this at his wedding ... and the guests who sat in the other room were soooo pissed off. I felt bad for them. Sure, they had cut out windows to look into the other room but they all said that they felt like they were out for dinner while a wedding was going on in the other room. They didn't feel part of the wedding and felt like they weren't good enough to sit with the other guests.
Personally, I would NEVER do that to my guests.
Adding ... how would YOU feel if YOU were put in a separate room, away from the other guests and the festivities, at a relatives or friends wedding??
Last year I attended a wedding where the guests were split similarly to how you're describing. 100 or so in the "main" room with dance floor, then 50 or so of us in a secondary room. The bar was situated sort of in between the two rooms. Most of the tables in the "main" room were "reserved" while the other tables were open seating. I ended up sitting in the secondary room.
During dinner it wasn't so bad. I enjoyed the people I was seated with and we were super close to the buffet and the coffee/tea. Once dinner was over and some of the more traditional things happened I felt very cut off from the main room. I could have gone into the main room, but there were no seats and the standing room in that area was rather crowded. By the end of the evening there was a very large crowd of us standing around the entrance to the main room having our own party.
I would really suggest keeping everyone together for eating and using the separate room for dancing/cake and ect. Depending on the space you have this should provide more standing/sitting room for your guests to see what's going on during the non-meal time and they won't feel like secondary guests during dinner.
I agree with keeping all the guests together and putting the dance floor in the adjoining room. I was at a wedding earlier this year where they had basically this same concept, and it worked out beautifully. They had some extra chairs and cocktail tables set up around the perimeter of the dance area so the non-dancing people could still gather to watch the fun on the dancefloor.
It may depend on the size of the adjoining room compared to the main room. Is it large enough for the majority to gather and watch the dancing?
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We finally received our rsvps back and we have more people than we were originally expecting. The way the room is set up we can have 150 people seating for dinner and have the dance floor set up for dancing. If we do this, we will have to set up several tables in an adjoining room and have guests eat there since we have more than 150 people coming. The adjoining room has 3 french doors that open into the main room, but there is definitely a wall in some places, and it's clearly a separate room. The other option is to have all of the guests in the reception room, including having tables where the dance floor would be. If we did this then the dancing would take place in the adjoining room. FI is very much against having the dancing take place in the other room and really really wants to use the dance floor in the reception room as a dance floor. Do you think guests will care if they are in the adjoining room? We would probably just put our friends out there so that it'd be kind of a party/fun room...