Post # 1
Hi. New to this but desperate for advice ideas…
Long story shirt – recently engaged, my partner has a very small family (mum dad brother and himself) I have a rather different background!
my parents divorced when I was 7 and parted on bad terms. my mother remarried, my father then passed away. Both sides of the family dislike eachother (I’d go as far to say hate eachother).
everyone says the old fashioned “it’s your say so they should just get along” and they possibly would, for ONE day, buy my dilemma is this…
i have had had two seperate families and effectively two seperate lives for almost 20 years and the thought of having both sides in the same place is my idea of hell…
Unfortunately I cannot have two weddings, so suggestions please!
Ive thought about getting officially married abroad with one side then coming home and having a blessing in church with the other – but both sides want to be at an official wedding!
i may just stay in engaged and change my name instead!! Lol
Post # 2
- Wedding: July 2014 - Prague
Well, if they truly want to come to your wedding to support you, they have to behave like adults. They just can’t have it both ways. Are you close enough to call them out on this issue? If so, you just need to sit them down and ask them if they are capable of behaving themselves.
Post # 3
Sorry you have to deal with this. It’s hard to say what is best without knowing your family. Do you really think they would cause an issue being in the same room, especially 20 years later? But if you do and it’s really your idea of hell to have them in the same room, I would consider eloping by yourselves or including parents and siblings only.
Post # 4
I would elope. And if either side ask why, tell them.
Post # 5
Baal: Ditto! Or plan a wedding and only invite your friends!
Seriously though, I know neither of those suggestions sound like a good option. I’m a firm believer in telling families that they can suck it up, come, and be NICE to each other….or not come at all. I would speak to both sides of the family and make it loud and clear that bad behavior or rudness at your wedding will not be tolorated and if they feel like they can’t abide by your wishes they will not be welcome to attend.