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This is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. Usually it's the other way around...people encouraging you to go where they went so they can tell you all about it.
I would tell her to shut it. Seriously.
I think she's totally overreacting!! Does she think she's the first person to ever honeymoon in Kauai? I think it's completly inappropriate for her to be making snide remarks.
As long as you and your FI are happy with a Kauai'n vacation then don't worry about her comments!
She is completely overreacting. Why in the world would she care where you're going on your honeymoon? A real friend would have started offering you advice if she found out you were going to the same place that she did.
How immature! There is no such thing as "copying a honeymoon," just ignore her, she's obviously petty. If she told me what she's telling your friends about you copying her, I would think she's a little crazy. If your honeymoon location is perfect for you two, don't be dissuaded and make sure you have a great time!
OMG, that's absurd! I'd do what you had planned. Who cares what some (obviously insecure and jealous) girl thinks. I'm sure anyone on the receiving end of her rants about it thinks she's crazy. First of all Halwaii is a huge honeymoon location, if you're copying her you're probably copying a few others you know. And if you have to avoid going anywhere has been traveled to by friends, you may be limited to like... your house! That is so strange, you should go there and send her a postcard! haha
she's being totally irrational and unreasonable!
[Your in-laws going to the same place as your honeymoon AT THE SAME time....that is unreasonable, but it's a story for another day]
Just try to ignore it as best you can...and mums the word. Don't talk to her about it or tell her your specific plans(where you stay, eat, what you do). If she offers advice I would politely decline and say you'd like to plan things on your own.
That's stupid. Tune her out and don't let it get to you. Everyone else will see how ridiculous she's being.
You should have said "Oh, I forgot you went there! Gosh wasn't your wedding like 3 years ago? How time flies"
Okay, TONS of people go to Hawaii and Kauai for their honeymoons. So either there are a million people copying her or she's being rediculous. Ugh.
LOL, while you are likely justifiably miffed and a little hurt by her behaviour, I am willing to bet that everyone else around her thinks she is a flaming idiot and is laughing at her. That is so weirdly immature, her social stock must be plummeting.
Honestly, next time she says something like this in front of you, put on your most saccharine sweet smile possible and say "well, of course we are copying you! You are such a great role model of style and grace."
BTW, I also love moderdaisy's response.
that's silly. she doesn't own that honeymoon. when we were planning our honeymoon, everyone we talked to kept telling us to go the same place that they went to because they all loved their honeymoons so much, they wanted us to have the same great experience.
I think she is being wholely unreasonable and little bit crazy. I know quite a few people who've honeymooned in Hawaii. Would I avoid Hawaii for that reason? NO! She must be jealous or petty or something. If she were a real friend, she'd be offering you advice instead of accusations! Go ahead with your plans. I am sure all your real friends are behind you 100%! :)
LOL! Thanks everyone! These are my thoughts exactly, but I wanted to make sure I wasn't missing anything, having never planned a wedding before. I'm encountering so many feelings and reactions from other people I never thought I would. When I told this person where we were going on our honeymoon, her face just fell. I mean, she looked really hurt. I asked her what's wrong and she said, "Are you sure you want to go on the same honeymoon we went on?" I told her that I had forgotten that she had gone there too, and it won't be the same honeymoon at all. For whatever reason, she got really upset about that remark. You see, she was the kind of bride who for the whole year she was engaged and the THREE years since she got married, nearly everything she's talked about was her wedding and how great it was. Now that I'm engaged and planning my own wedding, she constantly makes remarks as if her wedding is the benchmark or standard for the ideal wedding, anything else is inferior. After four years of this crap, I kind of started to tune her out. So, yeah, I did forget about details of her wedding.
Now she tells people things like, "so-and-so is going to Kauai and doing the exact same thing we did," or "so-and-so are going to Kauai because we went there," which of course isn't true at all. I know she's just being insecure and immature. And I kind of did tell her off by saying things like "don't flatter yourself. No one cares where anyone goes on their honeymoon. Seriously, your wedding is done, it's over! It's been THREE years! Enjoy your MARRIAGE!" I don't know, but I guess I hit a really sensitive nerve with her and she snapped! So now she's constantly talking behind our backs and criticizing and making fun of our wedding plans. But, yeah, I do my best to ignore her and I think everyone else thinks she's crazy too.
haha i am always telling people about places i've been and would recommend so that girl seems crazy to me. Ignore her crazy self. Personally, i would have said (regardless if true or not), "oh, i didn't know you guys went there!" b/c she seems like she wants you to know all about her.
I definitely think she's a little oversensitive about the topic! I always tell people about how awesome our honeymoon was and recommend anyone to go there since we were treated so well! I feel as if she's trying to hang on to every little thing she can about her wedding. Definitely just ignore her, and if she ever brings it up in your presence, kill her with kindness. Say, "we're so excited and really can't wait!" Don't let her know that her talking behind your back bothers you.
I feel awful, but I have a friend who still sort of makes snide remarks to me as well. She was married a few weeks before us, and was supposed to go to the Riviera Maya as well. A hurricane hit that week, and so she had to change her honeymoon destination at the last minute. Needless to say, any time one of our honeymoons come up, I hear about how it must have been nice to be able to go to the Riviera. Yikes...I just let it go.
shes being a spoilt witch and to be honest, i dont think i would want to be friends with someone that is so ungiving or ungracious!
its bad enough when some brides think their day should be their month/season or year but now making claim to an entire island ((insert drama queen smilie))
why are you still talking to this person? she sounds psycho.
What a loser. Seriously. OMG yes, honey, you are the only person in history to go to Hawaii for their honeymoon. You and your husband are the King and Queen of Kauai. STFU.
She's calling geographic dibs? Seriously? I honestly cannot even fathom this.
Whenever someone I know is going to travel to somewhere I've been, I'm always thrilled. Perhaps to a fault :) I inevitably end up inundating them with advice, brochures from the places I tried, guide books I purchased, etc. I completely and totally do not understand the thought process behind "I went there, so now you can't."
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA, is this a joke??
First of all...if I went on a honeymoon and loved it, I would tell ALL my friends to go there. This girl is acting nutso. Tell her to shut up. She doesn't own the rights to Kauai. Also, tell her that she got married THREE years ago...the jig is up.
Wow, I think this is one of my favorite it's-all-about-me stories ever. It sounds like she's missing being "the bride" and taking it out on you. If it wasn't the honeymoon, it would have been something else.
Because you say she can't stop talking about her wedding and using hers as a benchmark I'm guessing that maybe she's afraid since you're going to the same place that you'll get a better hotel and do more fun or extravagant things and show her up. Obviously that's not your intention at all, but sounds like she'd die if someone had a better honeymoon than her.
Thats one of the crazier things I have ever heard. I bet she was a bridezilla!
OMG!!!! she sounds horrible! I say continue what you're doing now (tuning her out) and go to Kauai and have a blast.
By the way, my FH and I are filipinos too and we are going to kauai on our honeymoon this april. Living here in california, I think hawaii is a good choice. Don't worry about her, she probably just can't let go of the attention. I hope you were not a bridesmaid or something on her wedding, she must have been an attention-grabbing bridezilla.
WOW that bride seems like she is OFF THE ROCKER!!!!!!!
HAH! I'm with galacticpony.
Kittyachi said it perfectly. I think you should say that to your psycho friend & see how she reacts. She's obv. a wack-job.
Wow, some people get really weird over stuff don't they? Go on your honeymoon and have a great time. Next thing you know she'll be telling you that you can't go anywhere with a beach for your honeymoon because she did! LOL. If someone said this to me I'd probably look at them in disbelief and walk away.
Um also, isn't Hawaii like the #1 honeymoon destination in the world? She thinks she discovered it or something? So strange, I normally get the opposite reaction, people are trying to force me to do the same honeymoon they did!
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When the fiance and I were planing our honeymoon, we knew we wanted to go someplace tropical and relaxing. We also wanted to go someplace we hadn't been before. Kauai seemed like a natural choice because it fit our budget (we're in California, so Hawaii is closer), it's the only island we've never been to in Hawaii and we both have a soft spot for Hawaii (my fiance is part polynesian and I'm Filipino, and we love the multicultural Asian/Polynesian vibe there). We've been all over Mexico, and don't want to stay in California for our honeymoon.
Then, someone we know of accused us of copying her, simply because she had gone to Kauai on her honeymoon THREE years before. When we decided on our destination, we never even thought of this person. We never thought "so-and-so went there for their honeymoon" while we made our decision. She never crossed our minds. But when she found out about our honeymoon plans, she was livid!
Now she tells everyone we're "copying" her, and she always makes snide remarks whenever our honeymoon comes up. She always keeping tabs on our honeymoon plans. I mean, seriously? I get how sensitive people can be over the actual wedding details (like colors, theme, etc), but honeymoon destinations, too? I mean, no one will be there on our honeymoon except the future hubby and I, so I don't understand how she can be so territorial over that. Is it just me, or is she overreacting?