Post # 1
- Wedding: May 2014 - Paradise Gardens
I along with the other BM in an upcoming wedding have been asked to pitch in to pay for a photobooth. Is this normal? I got married recently and tried to be very cost concious for the sake of my girls…and I feel like this bride is doing everyhting but being mindful of everyone’s expenses.
For the most part I’m fine with the normal stuff like…
- Wedding Hair
- Wedding Makeup
- Bachelorette party/weekend
- Transporation for the weekend
- Hotel Accomodation (everyone has to pay bc it’s an out of town wedding for everyone)
- Flight (this only applies to me)
- Vacation Time (wedding is on a Fridaya dn rehersal is Thursday)
- Gift for the couple
Now pitching in for an (unneccessary) vendor epense is beyond me and frankly I’m not into it. And if I do pitch in …does that mean I should also be getting them a gift for the actual wedding?
Am I overreacting or is this part of genreal bridesmaid duties? This is the 1st wedding I am apart of, so I can only really use my wedding as a reference and my girls only had to pay for their dress and alterations.
Post # 2
No, you definitely should not have to help pay for vendors. That is the bride and groom’s responsibility.
Post # 3
No, bridal party is not supposed to help pay for wedding vendors.
Post # 4
BreezyBride24: No. No sane person I have ever met would think to ask their BP to pitch in for vendor items at their wedding and/or reception. Crazy. I’ve been in many wedding and not once have I been asked to kick in towards a DJ, photo booth, favors, etc.
Post # 5
she’s taking advantage, looks like you’re already paying enough to be part of this wedding as it is. The bride is beyond rude.
Post # 6
BreezyBride24: Absolutely not. You don’t even have to pitch in for a necessary vendor. The wedding is for the couple (or in some cases the parents) to fund.
In my social circle the bridal shower and bachelorette are funded by the bridal party but never anything to do with the actual wedding or reception (besides of course dress, hotel, etc.)
Post # 8
- Wedding: May 2015 - Walnut Hill Bed & Breakfast
No. I don’t think you should. IF you do, and the cost is within the budget of the gift you would have been giving I might consider offering it as the gift. Perhaps get the bridesmaids together and discuss doing the photobooth for her as a group gift.
However I would certaintly be a little uncomfortable that she asked you to help her pay for something like that.
Post # 10
BreezyBride24: no way!! I’d feel taken advantage of if i was asked, and like a completely jackass if I was the one asking. I would politely respond that you are unable to contribute to that cost.
Post # 11
Nope. No. No. No. No. No. Nope.
Post # 12
- Wedding: June 2014 - San Francisco, CA
What?! No! That’s nuts. You’re a friend, not an ATM. Tell her to stuff it (politely, if you want to maintain the friendship, like “Martha, I’m sorry but that’s not in my budget. If it’s required of the bridal party I’m afraid I won’t be able to participate.”)
Post # 14
- Wedding: May 2014 - Paradise Gardens
LilRhodyGem: Really now? I know this is a relatively big wedding and they are strapped for cash…has this been the case with any of the weddings you’ve been in?
PenguinLove: To her defense…this is her MOH/Sister asking us to pitch in… not her directly. Her sister said it would be a great idea for us to surprise her with this gift especially since the groomsmen are pitching in for a different vendor. Sorry if I didn;t make that clear.
playdohpants: Yeah, I agree. What you and your social circle do is what I originally thought was expected of me. I’m just a little peeved because I think we’re going above and beyond for what is frankly a “hurry up” wedding.
amberback: Yes, I think it would be a group gift from the bridal party…but I am wondering if I should also be getting her a gift on my own. Maybe I’ll touch basis with the bridal party and see what they think.
And THANK all of you ladies for reassuring me that I’m not blowing this out of porportion. I’m glad this is considered a bit “unusual”.