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Do I get credit?

posted 4 months ago in Beehive

Hi Bees, I need your opinions!  I have corresponded with a bride after she posted on a forum asking for help on wedding locations on the same island I'm getting married at(destination wedding) in Mexico.  I referred her to speak with my photographer who was wedded at the same venue I will be, and also because she is very knowledgeable about the island in general.  Well, the bride ended up signing her on as her photographer as well.  Do you think I should ask for some sort of credit/reimbursement/incentive for this?  And if so, how should I phrase it appropriately and politely?

posted by Jen4637 117 posts 4 months ago

I guess it wouldn't hurt to ask.   You could email her and say "I heard my friend booked you for her wedding after I referred her to you!   By any chance do you offer any type of referral discount or credit?  I thought I'd just ask.  

posted by NorthCarolinaBride2B 47 posts 4 months ago

most vendors advertise or prefer to advertise by word of mouth anyway....they count on referrals to promote their business.  I doubt they will give you a discount for referring them....but I suppose you can ask.

posted by dreambml 429 posts 4 months ago

I wouldn't ask.  I think that while you could potentially make a buck in this situation, I think the question is whether you should.  Your photographer gave you good service, you pay her a fee and tell others how great she was.  It's when people start expecting kick-backs that the pay it forward waters get a little murky.  For example, I would never hire a day of coordinator that gets kick backs from vendors.  I would never trust that person to give me the right referral for me, I would feel she was just in it for the money.  Businesses survive because of good word of mouth, but I don't think you should ask for compensation.  Refer because you want to see that person's business succeed.

posted by Niki 432 posts 4 months ago

I agree with Niki. Most brides give references because they want to give the vendor more business, not because they're expecting a reward from it. Also, what if your photog says no? Would you feel awkward working with her after that (I know I would, but that's just me)? Is it worth risking a good working relationship for a few bucks?

posted by rebecca 989 posts 4 months ago

I wouldn't ask for a credit explicity.  If you're interested, you could always send a quick email to the photographer, as NorthCarolinaBride suggested, but leave off the bit about any discounts.  That way, the photographer knows you helped make the connection - it will probably make them happy to know you value the service enough to recommend highly.  If they want to throw something in as a thank-you, they can do it.  If not, no worries - if you don't mention it, there isn't the potential for awkwardness if they say no.

An even more low-key approach would be to add a line at the end of an email about something else. 

posted by missm 485 posts 4 months ago

I personally think that there's nothing wrong with asking, and I wouldn't be surprised if your photographer does have some type of referral discount or bonus.  After all, it's not like you referred your friend for a single portrait session - a wedding is big business.  Every photographer I have worked with over the years does offer a discount for repeat business - the photographer we used for our wedding did the last four portrait sessions (including two rounds of senior pictures) for our families, and he gave us a pretty significant discount because of that.  A referral discount or bonus is not really that different.

posted by suzanno 1,976 posts 4 months ago

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