- 5 years ago
- Wedding: July 2013
So FI has one sister, “Kellie.” Kellie is married to “Marco” so Marco is FI’s brother in law.
When we got engaged and started thinking about our wedding parties, FI and I decided not to include Marco & Kellie. They live in another country, and Marco and FI are not super close. Likewise, I’m not particularly close with Kellie. We’re friendly and get along, but definitely nothing more than that.
Anyway, FI just changed his mind and decided that he wants Marco to be a groomsman now, in hopes that the two of them can be closer, which is lovely. But now does that mean I have to include Kellie as a BM?
I didn’t include her because A) We’re not close, B) she’s in another country which would make dress fittings and things tough, C) she didn’t include me in her wedding to Marco so I assume the feelings are mutual, and D) apparently she told her mother that she “hopes MrsCreeToBe doesn’t ask me to be a bridesmaid” which I have to admit hurt me a lot at the time because I was hoping we’d get closer, but oh well.
I’m not quite sure if I’m supposed to do anything now that FI has decided to include his brother in law. If I don’t include Kellie, I don’t want to be seen as rude. If I do ask her to be a BM, I’ll feel awkward knowing that she said something about not wanting to be. We’re not doing any readings at the ceremony so I can’t include her that way.
I asked FI and he had no idea what I should do. Any ideas? Is it okay to leave her out even if her husband’s included?