(Closed) Do I have to invite the officiant to the reception?

posted 8 years ago in Reception
Post # 3
Member
2208 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Yeah, I think you really should, unless she officiates professionaly. If she is not a professional, and is just doing this as a favor, you should invite her.

Post # 4
Member
23 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2009

I believe it’s polite & customary to do so.  The good news is that most officiants will decline the invitation, but in your case you may not have such luck.

Post # 5
Member
3162 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I think you probably should, yeah. Your other uninvited friends would understand considering this person is marrying you that she would be invited to the reception.

Speaking of this issue – what’s the etiquette re: a professional officiant and the reception?

Post # 6
Member
95 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Yes I think it is proper to invite your officiant. Your friends will understand since you would be inviting the officiant probably regardless if she was a friend or not.

Post # 7
Member
2208 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

@ Kittyachi: I think the ettiquette is still to invite, but in her circumstance (really intimate reception) I think deviating from the norm could make sense.

Post # 9
Member
118 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

It’s a slightly different situation because she is a friend… I’m a professional Celebrant / officiant, and, though I do get invited to receptions, I am never offended if I don’t, and I very, very rarely actually attend (of the nearly 75 weddings I’ve done, I’ve stayed for four receptions – and two of those were friends).

So – the “pro officiant” etiquette is that it is nice to invite them to the rehearsal dinner / reception, but they will probably not come, and are not offended if you don’t.  If you really DO want your officiant to come, make sure to invite them with a guest, which will make it more likley that they may choose to attend, but don’t be sad if they decline.  It’s not always fun to be at a wedding reception where you don’t know anyone!

As for the original poster, because she is a friend, it gets harder.  If you really don’t want to invite her, take her aside and explain the situation as tactfully as possible.  Are you paying her?  If it’s a friend-favor in anyway, and you think she’ll be “snubbed” if you don’t invite her, you may have to bite the bullet and do it.

Post # 11
Member
1962 posts
Buzzing bee

Are you paying her?

Post # 13
Member
1962 posts
Buzzing bee

I think you’ve got it right.  If you give her cash money I don’t think the invite is necessary.  Just make sure you send her the bash invitation and make it clear that she is invited to that super early.

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