(Closed) Do i need to get a gift?

posted 7 years ago in Gifts and Registries
  • poll: Do i get them a gift?
    Yes : (18 votes)
    62 %
    No : (8 votes)
    28 %
    Frame my MOH speech for her? : (3 votes)
    10 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    6394 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: September 2011

    Honestly, if I’m in the bridal party and I have to travel I don’t frequently give gifts. I felt kind of guilty about it, but most of them were when I was in college and made $400 a month tops. Now that I’m getting married, though, I thought about it, and there’s no way I expect ANY of my girls to get me gifts! They’re already buying dresses and some of them are traveling.

    Unless your bride is incredibly different, I doubt she would even expect you to get her anything.

    Post # 4
    Member
    566 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    Wow.  Spending $600 to go to her wedding and be a part of it is a lot of money.  Since you said money is tight, I think she would understand not receiving a present.  She should be happy you’re helping her the day of and not expect a present. 

    A small, inexpensive present would be a nice gesture though.  Is there anything sentimental you could get her for under $20?  If there is thought behind an inexpensive gift, it sends a strong message.  If you have the time and are crafty, maybe you could create her a book with marriage advice from a newlywed (you).  She might find it silly in a cute way.

    Also, when is Canadian Thanksgiving? How much time do you have to figure this out?

    Post # 5
    Member
    581 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    I’m a fan of the small gift card to one the stores where she’s registered. Even for just $5! It’s the gesture that counts.

    Post # 6
    Member
    520 posts
    Busy bee

    I think it would be nice to give her a small, thoughtful and inexpensive gift along with a card wishing her well.  You can purchase a pretty picture frame or something along those lines….

    Post # 8
    Member
    6661 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2010

    I say no. I kind of wish my MOH’s and BM’s didn’t buy me presents, but I didnt’ tell them not to b/c I thought that was rude to even talk about gifts.

    You are spending a ton of $ to be in her wedding which you didn’t even want to spend on your own honeymoon, so I say you’ve done enough. Just give her the card so she knows that’s it.

    Post # 10
    Member
    251 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    Wow! It’s already become an extremely expensive wedding for you, hasn’t it?

    I would say you absolutely do not have to buy a gift.  I never have, and did not expect that you should buy gifts for the bride and groom when you are in the wedding party.  That, of course, is just my opinion.

    My suggestion to you, instead, would be to write her a nice card and give it to her before or after the wedding.  Just explain in it how honored you are to be a part of her day and how happy you are about the friendship you both have formed.  This way, she’ll know it’s not that you just forgot, etc.

    Post # 11
    Member
    1088 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    You are the MOH so I say yes. Give her something that’s inexpensive, make her something, but at LEAST give her a card.

    Post # 13
    Member
    1088 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    @Baileyh: No, I think that would be cool…and sweet. ๐Ÿ™‚ It’s free for you but still special for her.

    Post # 14
    Member
    566 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    That would be cute!  Go for it! I like the framing idea.  It wouldn’t take much time and woudn’t be expensive.

    Post # 16
    Member
    103 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: November 2010

    Just echoing the above posters, I come from the school of always giving them something. A small gift, a gift card, or something sentimental is nice, but if you can’t do that, a card (in my books) is completely necessary. Of course everyone is coming from a different place, and if you can’t do it or can’t afford it, that’s another case.

    I don’t really equate the money you have to spend to be in a wedding with whether you should/should not give a gift. No bridesmaid is ever “forced” to participate in a wedding – accepting to be part of a wedding party goes with the understanding that money will be spent.

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