(Closed) Do I really have to be polite?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1276 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

If you don’t want her there, don’t invite her. I don’t think it matters that you come from a small office, just invite the 3 people you are close to. 

Post # 4
1830 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

If you’re not inviting just the three you’re closest to (which I think would be fine!), then yes, you do need to invite her, and yes, you do have to just suck it up with her there.  I don’t think there’s any way you can try and put her off attending without it being glaringly obvious.  And who knows, maybe her obnoxious manner at work is covering up for some major insecurities and perhaps she’s a lot different outside of the work setting.   Regardless, it will be your wedding day and you will be surrounded by so much love and happiness, I don’t think one person is going to ruin your day.  

Post # 5
460 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Sorry yes you do have to be polite since you did invite her. I feel like I could have written this post as well, only I HAD to invite a (loud obnoxious rude) girl who I work with who I got in a very loud heated argument with (almost physical) and of course she is coming 🙁 I have warned friends to keep her away from me.

Post # 6
145 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I went the opposite route and invited no one from work, even though I am close to a couple like you are. Mine was also a small wedding so I used that as an excuse. The truth is your wedding day goes by so fast, it’s like you blink and it’s over, you should spend it only with the people you truly care about and who will be in your life for years to come. This is going to make me sound not so nice, but even though I am friends with some of my co-workers I honestly did not miss them or notice they weren’t there. 

Post # 7
5494 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2011

I have an office of 9 and only invited the 2 people I wanted there. If there were hurt feelings I really don’t care. But also I think people understand. These are co-workers after all, not friends. Don’t feel bad. Just invite who you want.

Post # 9
879 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I have people from work that I will be inviting, and others that I won’t be.

My Fiance works on a small crew of 5.  There is one person on that crew who is a white anter and has made his job extremely difficult.  Everyone is being invited except him.  I don’t want him anywhere near our wedding. 

I don’t believe that makes me horrid.  I think HE was horrid for the way he treated my Fiance just because he has eyes on his job.

Invite who you are close to, invite who you want there, not who thinks they should be there.  But thats just my two cents.

Post # 10
7296 posts
Busy Beekeeper

it seems that you have not yet sent out invites, so i really suggest only inviting those 3 you are close to. the rest will get over it.  i cant think of any way to put off this annoying person from wanting to attend – unless you haven’t set your date in stone and you find out a day she really can’t make it!  but i have a feeling that would be difficult and silly to pull off.

Post # 11
814 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

I’m one of those “to hell with etiquette” kinda pepole so I would have only invited those I wanted there, even if it meant 9/10. It’s your wedding, you should only have people you actually want there.

If you’ve already sent out invites, it’s too late and you can’t really put her off coming I think.

Post # 12
284 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I think that it is more likely to cause problems if you invite 9/10 instead of 3/10… Not inviting just one person makes the purposeful exclusion particularly evident, and if this lady is a royal be-yotch, she might take that as an excuse to make your life hellish if she’s the only one not invited. If there are six others in her shoes, at least she will have people to commiserate with.

But seriously, don’t invite people you don’t like. You’re not obligated to invite anybody.

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