(Closed) Do I say something???? (Kinda long)

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1281 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Glasgowbound:  I’d just call her out on it directly.  Tell her what you saw and tell her that no one is holding her hostage to come.  If she doesn’t want to come, she is under no obligation to, and leave it at that.  

Post # 4
Member
2861 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Glasgowbound:  is she real cheap in general?

Post # 5
Member
4313 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I woudn’t.  As rude and tasteless as it is, I find it clear that she loves you and wants to spend time with you, but does not like the idea of bachelorette parties, period.  I would try not to take it personally.  For as immature as she thinks bachelorettes are, she should really take a look in the mirrior, though!

Post # 6
Member
1069 posts
Bumble bee

I agree with the previous poster who said to just call her out on it. I think it’s really rude that she posted that somewhere you can see it.

Post # 7
Member
3039 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@rubybride718: +1.

I agree, you should definitely bring it up and let her know that while you would love to see her, she doesn’t have to attend something that she so obviously dislikes. In fact, after reading about her previous behaviour – I would probably not want her to attend at all.

Post # 9
Member
4441 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall

@Glasgowbound:  I kind of understand your “BFF” weddings are expensive for guests and all that adds up quickly in the form of resentment!  

But why she would say something like that where you could see it is beyond me!  Not to mention she shouldn’t even be thinking it… If you can comment on that I would say something simple to show that you’re obviously hurt like “sorry seeing me is such an inconvenience, you definitely don’t have to come if you don’t want to or are unable to.”

Post # 10
Member
2390 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

She sounds like a jealous bitch, and someone I wouldn’t be friends with. She’s 38????? Good grief.

Post # 11
Member
8325 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

I honestly don’t understand why you are upset about the comment. It wasn’t like she said she hated you and you were forcing her to attend. She commented that she dislikes bachelorette parties. And it sounds like her friend might share a similar view on them.

I hate attending childrens parties at those indoor entertainment centres and would probably post it on facebook if I used it but I suck it up to attend a friend or relative childs birthday party. Doesn’t mean I don’t love the kid, it just means that I hate the concept of 50-100 screaming kids trapped in an echoey centre giving me a headache.

Post # 12
Member
1685 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

It depends: is it going to continue bothering you?

Obviously you are important to her and she’s going for you.  However, the bachelorette thing isn’t her cup of tea.  Nonetheless, it was a little crass putting her complaint out there on Facebook.

If you think you can get over it and just chalk it up to her having a lapse in judgement, don’t say anything.

However, if it is going to eat at you, you should say something.  It can be something as little as a comment underneath saying, “We are going to force you to drink out of a pe!s straw the entire weekend.  Muahahaha!”

Or you can give her a call and say, “I saw your comment on Facebook about how you don’t like bachelorettes.  I wanted to talk to you about it.  I would absolutely love to have you there, but more importantly, I want you to be comfortable.  I’d like to give you the option of doing a mini bachelorette with me instead of the big bachelorette with everyone else.  We could get brunch, follow it with mani/pedis, and then go to the movies/museum/vineyard/ice skating/(whatever activity you might like to do together).  It’s very important to me to celebrate with you.  But I definitely want to make the time we spend together fun!”

Post # 13
Member
1850 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

I’d call her on it and tell her she doesn’t have to come, so she can stop her bitching.

Then again, I’m a B sometimes and I don’t tolerate passive aggression.

Post # 15
Member
4774 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Ugh.  Wow. people.  I never cease to be amazed.  It’s astounding really.  I think I would have just replied to the tread on FB and said, “don’t bother.”  I donno how you talked to her for an hour without getting upset and confronting her.

I really think I’d just de-friend and move on. She seems incredibly 2-faced. Toxicity is not welcome.

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