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I just wonder if your soon to be husband will get into trouble (for his job) if you tell people at the wedding? IDK but maybe if that is an issue, maybe people will not think about it, if you tell them a month or two after the wedding, then you could maybe pretend that the baby came early???
I would tell your FI and ask him what he thinks. It may affect his job, or he may have a strong opinion either way, so I would talk to him first.
I really think you should tell your FI before you make any decisions. Honestly, if my FI found out that the internet knew before he did, he'd be very hurt.
@Amaryllis: I'm 1 week pregnant - I thought it would be awful to tell him and then loose the baby - I intend to tell him in a week - just to up the chances of survival - I'm telling you all because I had to tell someone - but I didn't want to risk it - so I'm telling relative strangers.
@rlsulli1598@verizon.net: That is something to consider, but none of my FI's parishioners will be attending - it's just close friends and family - who I would want to tell after a month anyway - like you said - once I reach the 3 or 4 month mark then I can just say I'm pregnant and that the baby is a little premature. :)
@vicarswifeintraining: normally if you are only 1 week pregnant, it won't show up on the tests yet--the hormone level isn't strong enough yet. didn't you post a thread awhile ago about thinking you were pregnant? you were probably right at that point.
edit: i wouldnt tell your guests at the wedding. i'd tell your fiance, and then tell people around 3 months because you never know what might happen..you'd be like what, 2 months at the wedding?
@Boston Bee: I'm confused, why would it affect his job? I'm lost lol
@bride2bejc: I get it now ... I just read the poster's user name =)
What if you have a 9lb baby.... I don't think people will believe it is a little premature. You might want to just let people think what they want. Personally, I would tell people a couple months after my wedding.
vicarswifeintraining I'd tell my fiance' right away. Speaking from experience, if anything happened to your baby you would need his support more than ever. I could not have gone through my miscarriage alone... my fiance' has been here for me every step of the way. Just a little something for you to think of.
If it won't jeopardize FI's job, and it is just close friends and family--I think it would be totally fun to announce that you are expecting at your wedding :)
@blondeeebuckeye: it's very complicated! But essentially I signed up for a drugs trial thing to help pay for the wedding - they took a urine sample to make sure I'm healthy before they start the trial - and they phoned me to tell me I'm pregnant - I assume that the drugs company have a similar special test as we have in work (I'm a nurse) that can test really early on - But I do know that normal tests don't work this quickly,
also I tested my self quite a few times after my pregnancy scare so I am certain that I wasn't pregnant then.
@bride2bejc: he's a vicar - but to be honest he's in a inner city church - any problems would be within the church - not the community. :)
A friend of mine in the same situation decided to announce the great news at her wedding by posting it on the back of the wedding programs.
@rlsulli1598@verizon.net: Yay!! so do I! - but I don't want it to be distracting! :P
I don't think you should announce it at the wedding. I think it would take away from the focus on you as a couple. Mrs. Dumpling was pregnant at her wedding, and most of her close friends and family knew (including their priest), but they focused on their marriage that day, and she didn't make a public announcement until afterwards. It wasn't as if they tried to pretend she wasn't pregnant, but they just focused on the wedding first. I think you will be glad to have done it that way -- you have your whole lives to be parents, but only one day to be the bride and groom!
As far as your husband's occupation, even though his parishioners may not be there, I can imagine that some of your friends and family are very religious and may be uncomfortable. It would probably be better to not risk that, and be somewhat quiet about it until after the wedding. But I wouldn't pretend the baby was premature -- just let people figure it out for themselves!
:-) I don't think it'd be distracting, since it's your own wedding. Distracting would be if you stole the mic at a friend's (or strangers', haha) wedding!
@vicarswifeintraining: i work in healthcare too (previously worked in an ob clinic too) and i've always been told it took 10 days to show up in a blood test, which is the most sensitive test for pregnancy. with urine, it's 12 days.
i'm not meaning to argue with you or anything like that, i just wonder if you might be further along than you think!
if you tell your fiance asap you could then go get an ultrasound before the wedding and have the doctor test your HCG hormone by a blood test and get a much more accurate result :)
IMHO I would wait until after the wedding and after you are past the first tri. I would tell your hubby first and foremost :) good luck
i agree that my husband would be very upset if weddingbee knew before he did...kinda off topic, but i just had to say that.
I would tell the FI as soon as possible so he is in the loop, but I would hold off telling anyone else until after the first trimester. Esp at a wedding you want the focus to be you two.
I think this is a personal decision... Only you can know what's right for you. I've had people close to me do it both ways, and have it work out great. I did have one friend who announced it at the wedding and then subsequently had a miscarriage. She didn't regret it, however, because she said she preferred to have the support of her close friends and family in a difficult time.
@blondeeebuckeye: ahh - ok, to be honest I was never told 12 days - it's just standard procedure, I was just told that it was less accurate but could be taken earlier - no specifics, I could be further along than I think - I'm saying a week since that was when I had my withdrawal bleed from the pill - but I guess that I could be earlier then - I've been on the pill perfectly for the last month - so I can't be that pregnant either way :) !!
Congratulations!!!!
I've got no real advice, other than to see what your FI thinks about announcing it, but just wanted to say congrats! :)
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So I found out that I'm pregnant yesterday - my FI doesn't know yet - no one does but my FI and family will know soon - I'd like to tell my guests at the wedding - but I don't want to detract from the big day - which is for my FI and I, I'd love to tell everyone - the people at the wedding are all quite close to me - so even though I wont really start telling people until I'm 3 or 4 months gone - to be safe, I would obviously tell my friends and family sooner - and the wedding seems to be a nice time - is this a bad idea though - or what??
please help.