Post # 1
im one of the first out of my groups of friends to get married. Do most people have an engagement party?? When my fiancé proposed he had a dinner afterwards with our immediate family but I don’t think that counted as the engagement party as it was just a dinner and no one brought presents it was more of a proposal surprise. Is it typical to have an engagement party and bridal shower? I don’t want family to think it’s too much and don’t want people to have to spend so much for w gift for each event
Post # 2
My mom wanted to throw a little engagement party, only close family (parents, grandparents, aunts, unlces, cousins). I specifically asked no one to bring gifts – I didn’t want it to see gift grabby. And I had never been to an engagement party/known of anyone to have one before. We just wanted to get people together for light snacks and drinks. Not a lot of people showed up and it seemed like more stress than it was worth. If I could redo it, I’d just go out to eat with immediate family to keep it simple.
Post # 3
We had one, but that was because we also just moved in to our house at that time and made it an Engagement Party/House Warming. I also opted out of having a bridal shower because of the engagement pary. We got a lot of gifts and I did want to look like I was looking for more. We had a shorter engagement (8 months) so I felt it would have been too much.
Post # 4
We didn’t, but I kind of wish we had : /
We had dinner with a few couples we are close with, but they get together once a month or so anyway.
It would have just been nice tO have the experience, since once we get married the fuss is over
Post # 5
We did brunch with immediate family the weekend after we got engaged. I called that our engagement party. My brother had a little cocktail party at a bar. His friends bought appetizers, everyone bought their own drinks. I don’t think engagement parties are usually big gift giving events. The only gift we received was some bridal magazines. I didn’t get my brother and his then fiance anything but I think some people gave them wine and champagne.
I think its fine if you want to celebrate but keep it to close family and close friends.
Editing to add: Other than my own and celebrating my brother getting engaged I’ve only ever been to one other engagement party and I’ve been to probably 25 weddings. I think some other people probably had them but limited them to close family.
Post # 6
I only know 2 or 3 people who have ever had an engagement party. I think most people do not. (I didn’t.)
Post # 7
I know one couple that had one, it was really cute and low key, backyard bbq type setting. We didn’t have one but we did go out to a fancy schmancy steakhouse with FI’s parents to celebrate.
Post # 8
I’d say it’s about 50/50 where I’m from. I didn’t have one because it just seemed like one more thing to organize, but they can be a fun way to celebrate with your friends and family. You can keep it informal and request ‘no gifts’ so it’s comes across more just an excuse to all get together, rather than making people celebrate YOU incessently.
Post # 9
Engagement parties are not very popular in my circle of friends, but I had one. My FI planned it the night we got engaged. I was told we were meeting friends for a birthday (which is not out of the norm for us) but my FI instead had a bunch of our friends at the restaurant to congratulate us after he proposed. It was so sweet and I was very overwhelmed. We didn’t receive any gifts but we got a bunch of cards.
I had 2 bridal showers – which are the norm with my friends. We had 2 because FI’s family lives out of state so we traveled there for it. They were thrown by our moms, which I know is technically against etiquette, but it’s also the norm in my area.
Post # 10
I only know of two couples who had one. One was lebanese and weddings are customarily very large and formal, so she had the works. The other has a long engagement, so they decided to have a party that they hosted. Unless you really want to have one and plan to host (aka pay for it), I wouldn’t have one personally.
Post # 11
I only know 1 person who has had an engagement party and even then it was more like a big get together with thier wedding party to officially ask them to be in the wedding.
Post # 12
sunnierdaysahead2 : mom’s throwing showers is against etiquette? I had no clue haha. I’m having 2 as well because our family’s are 6 hours apart. The moms are throwing both.
Post # 13
We had one because its custom in my culture and also since our engagement is 3 years long. If we had only a 1 year engagement then we most likely wouldn’t have.
Post # 14
bridetobespring2018 : we had a small engagement party and got like 2 gifts (which I fully didn’t expect). It was very low key. Our engagement is also over a year long though, so the engagement party and bridal shower were very far apart.
Post # 15
I didn’t! We made our announcements and had a few casual dinners with close friends and family. After some thought, it just did not feel right to throw one after having already gotten together with loved ones.