(Closed) do people ask you this question too?

posted 7 years ago in 20 Something
Post # 3
Member
328 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@mpc87: Have not had this happen. Though, I have had people ask me, “You’re not married yet?” or “Think you’ll ever get married?” … yeah, I would have done it sooner but not everyone finds their Mr. Right at a young age. I’m 30, and I just found Mr. Right for life. I’d kind of get irritated if people asked me, “Why?” lol…

Post # 4
Member
318 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

I worked at a public library when I first became engaged. A lady I was helping preached to me about how she was divorced and how stupid I was being for getting married so young. So, yes. It’s very frustrating. I started to defend myself, telling her that we’ve dated for four years, have been best friends since fifth grade, and that I was working on my masters and wasn’t some young, stupid girl. Then I decided that she doesn’t matter and it’s SO not worth it. I feel your pain, though.

Post # 5
Member
9057 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

Honestly, I think 26 just might be the perfect age to get engaged/married as far as thoughtless comments go.  I was pretty much left alone, but my friend who got engaged at 24/married at 25 got questioned constantly. 

Nobody really bugged me about being too old either.

 

Post # 6
Member
1177 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I totally understand.. Granted, I’m younger. But not all young marriages fail either.. I have a cousin who was married at 17 and they’ve been together now 11 years. I’d say that’s pretty good.

I just hate when people think it’s their place to judge whether I’m prepared or not!

Post # 7
Member
2459 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

@SapphireSun: I think your right, I was 26 when we got engaged and married at 28 and did not receive a single comment, I think over 25 and under 30 is what people seem to be excepting of, unfortunately.

Post # 8
Member
24 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I’m 21 but I look younger than my age so, I mostly get weird looks when they notice my ring. He proposed Nov 2010 and Wedding’s not til’ Spring 2012. I work in retail so I see so many different reactions….and I have so many come backs. It doesn’t bother me because they’re obviously don’t understand our commitment towards each other.
To…”Oh, you’re so young.” I Say “We lucky to have found each other so soon and want to celebrate our love and enjoy the rest of our life together.”
To the-ones-who stare-at-my-belly… “Oh no…We’re having too much fun with life to be settled down.”
To the single sceptical women…”I’m sorry it didn’t work out for you. But if we do get divorced you can tell me ‘I told you so’.”  <–Use with caution
AND just smile. AND change the topic.

Post # 9
Member
4755 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

People comment typically from experience so generally the public has seen a lot of young marriages fail which is why people make comments. Is it annoying, probably but it is what it is.

Marrying older drastically decreases your chance of divorce.

Post # 10
Member
939 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I have a relative that likes to comment on people’s age/when are they getting married.  but it’s more the other end of the spectrum.  FI and i started dating in oct 2009 and he was my first serious bf.  And the only guy i ever brought home to meet my parents.  The first time this relative met him she asked when we were getting married.  At that point we had only been dating for about 6 months.  I was kinda thrown for a loop, i didn’t know what to say so i mumbled through it.  My little sister says her and her bf get that from her all the time.  She is 22 now and they have been dating for 5 years.  They don’t plan on getting married till at least 2014 because she wants to wait until she is graduated from college, has a steady job and can save to have the wedding of her dreams.  I think that’s incredibly level-headed and mature of her. 

This relative, however, feels the need to point out that she will be 25! at that point.  Apparently that is getting “old.”  Currently I’m 26 and will be 28 when i get married, FI will be 33.  Prior to my engagement, every holiday/family get together i was asked when we are getting married.  it got to the point where i would say “never.  I never want to get married” just to get her to shut up.

Basically, i just wanted to point out that some people in general feel the need to constantly comment on your life and what you’re doing wrong with it.  Whether it be you’re getting married to young, or you’re waiting too long. 

Post # 11
Member
4355 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I’m also 24 years old but I’ve never been told that I’m getting married young. Actually, I always pictured myself getting married a little younger than I am.

Post # 12
Member
6598 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

I was engaged at 26 and married at 27 and I didn’t get a single comment about our age. But a lot of “It’s about times” etc. (We have been together for 8 years)

Post # 13
Member
10288 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

I was 24 when we were engaged and I never got a single comment about being too young. FI and I have been together for 6 years so really the only remarks we got were “It’s about time”. We’re both 25 now (and still will be at our wedding) and I think it’s the perfect age to get married.

Post # 14
Member
3174 posts
Sugar bee

I get that question all the time. FI and I are both 22 but will be 25 when we get married but people just like to start drama i guess

Post # 15
Member
2195 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I’m 25 and I CONSTANTLY get that. People are just jealous.

Post # 16
Member
573 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Its tough, ppl find it very easy to give opinions … I always hear that 50% of marriages end in divorce and that gives me hope…bc it means the other half live happily ever after! Lol

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