(Closed) Do we have to seat people on “sides”?

posted 7 years ago in Logistics
  • poll: Seating guests according to to bride/groom's "side" is...
    Sensible : (2 votes)
    4 %
    Outdated : (29 votes)
    56 %
    I don't really care either way : (21 votes)
    40 %
  • Post # 4
    Member
    8354 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2011

    Traditionaly, families are seated according to whether they belong to the brides side of the family or the grooms side of the family. Personally, I think that is outdated. You should sit your guests where you want to seat them. We are going to have like aged guests sit with other like aged guests. It won’t matter who’s family they are in. For your situation, I would leave everyone sitting where they are during the ceremony. I think it would be more hassle than it’s worth to move them around after the ceremony.

    Post # 5
    Member
    11327 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2011

    Our immediate families will be seated according to side, but after that we will encourage people to mix ‘n mingle. Mostly because I have a huge family relative to my FI’s (like probably 60ish people from my family coming as opposed to 9 from his). And we dont want it to look awkward. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    1129 posts
    Bumble bee

    I think given the fact that you will have a seating chart, escort cards would really be helpful.  However – I don’t think you need to seat anyone on a side, just take care to place your closest family nearest to the front so they have full view of the ceremony. 🙂

    Post # 8
    Member
    1892 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    Personally it doesn’t really matter to me. I think all the weddings I’ve been to tables were divided among immediate families and then after that were kinda mixed with either like ages or families that had enough people to fill that tables regardless of “belonging” to the bride and groom. Actually the last wedding I was at my family (myself, parents, my one brother and his wife) were seated with the DOC! It was rather aquired at first but it worked out and we had some great conversations about wedding planning and decor tips.

    BTW do you watch Four Weddings?  It was either last week or the week before, but the one bride had her guests seated at tables during the ceremony. I immediately thought of you when I saw this! It seemed to work out for them (well what you can tell from the little clips lol).

     

    Post # 10
    Member
    1892 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    @Statutory Grape: Oh haha I only got cable right before I graduated HS so I totally know what that’s like. Just thought I’d mention it so you could “see” how it looked and worked. I think everything will work out fine for you as well!!

    Post # 11
    Member
    232 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: December 2010

    For our ceremony, people can sit wherever they choose. Thats one tradition that doesn’t have to be upheld at out wedding. Its about two families coming together so people may as well mix because everyones is family from that day on.

    Post # 13
    Member
    5978 posts
    Bee Keeper

    @Statutory Grape: I think it’s fun to mix and migle the tables. I mean, we sat people at one table who all knew each other…so that started with one table being a bride table vs. being a groom table, but after that, we mixed and matched the tables according to who was closest to us. So one side of the room had both bride and groom tables, but were arranged by family first, then friends. Make sense?

    You’re supposed to be bringing two families together for celebration, and what better way for family to get to know each other than to mix the tables?

    Post # 14
    Member
    13101 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    I think it is very outdated to sit people by side.  My extremely traditional church actually won’t even allow you to seat people by sides!  Plus, what would you do with friends who are close to both you and your FI?  Whose “side” would they be on?  It just doesn’t make sense ……

    I’d just put your parents at a table near the front with whoever they want to sit with, your FI’s parent’s at another table near the front with whoever they want to sit with, the rest of your families grouped with people who’ll they’ll get along with well and your friends grouped with other friends they know.

    Post # 15
    Member
    1418 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    I don’t think you necessarily need to assign seats so much as tables – so you will say these 8 people are at this table, but then who really cares what chair they take!  Unless you have a specific favor for the females vs. males for example.  In terms of mixing it up – that is what we will do.  We will have our parents and their friends together and then it will be more age based I think.  That way people can sit and visit with those the same age as them and they don’t have to eat with their parents.  After all…it is about mixing two families together anyways!  I guess it depends how much you want to fight this.  Good luck!

    Post # 16
    Member
    4510 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    We did not do “sides;” we weren’t afraid to mix people at tables during the reception, either. I personally find the whole idea of sides silly–what if you’re a friend of both the bride and groom? Having just gone through our wedding, I can say that, at least for us, where people were seated did not matter one bit.

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