Do you keep in touch via email, etc.
or do you still get together in person,
or do you have no contact whatsoever?
I still get together for lunch and stuff with some of them, still talk to them on the phone, so does Mr. 99, it's silly to think that just because it didn't work out romantically, the fundamental friendship has to suffer...I know circumstance has a lot to do with it, and a lot of time has passed between breakup and now for all of us, so I think that helps, we're older, wiser and more mellow.
I pretty much do not want to be in touch with any exes, especially the LAST one, who will not go away, after three years.
My husband has to stay in touch with his ex to a point because they have two children and 6 grandchildren.
Both Mr. Hobbit and I do, but we both recognize that we are the exception rather than the rule. We both have really constructive 110% platonic relationships with some of our exes, so it works for us and our situation. It won't work for everyone. One of my exes actually helped out Mr. Hobbit quite a bit with my elaborate proposal.
To each his own.
There is one that I may chat with via instant messenger every now and then, we also send a happy birthday text to each other.
I don't have any. My SO is still FB friends with his. He wished her a happy birthday last year on FB, When she got engaged and changed her status on FB a year ago, he wrote congrats on that update. Otherwise they have not spoken in years.
I used to see my exes a lot more in group settings, but since getting married and moving away, I've lost touch with that group. Never really "kept in touch" with any of them, though.
DH doesn't keep in touch or see any of his exes. Except for one, and only because DH was friends with her brother before they dated and is still quite close with him. So, we do see her on occasion, but again, don't "keep in touch".
I really don't, but my FI does. It took me a long time to get to be OK with it. I was VERY uncomfortable at first, and at one point their relationship almost broke us up.
I regularly talk to all but one of my exes and get together very rarely with a few of them. His ex of 15 yrs passed so he doesn't.
He doesn't talk to any of his, I still speak to mine that I had in say - middle school, so not really serious relationships. I still speak to the family of my last ex before Mr. O around the holidays/their birthdays, just a quick text hello, and he still does the same to my family. He was around for 5 years, so it's fine that we stay in touch, we're just happier with other people!
One of his ex's happens to be one of his best friends, so he still talks to her. I dont mind. I've hung out with her a few times as well. They were best friends way before they dated, and it was just weird for them to have a relationship so they split on good terms.
I've talked with one of my ex's a few times through email. We never actually split, so to speak. We were in a long distance relationship and both of our towns had bad storms and power outages. My power was out for a week so I couldnt talk to him, and when I finally got power again his phone was turned off and I could never get a hold of him. He hadnt had internet for almost a year by that point, so the phone was our only way of talking. About 2 years later he made a facebook with the sole purpose of searching for me. We still talk sometimes. He's actually married to a girl who is the manager of a store of the same company I work for now.
I'm still remotely in touch with a couple of my high school boyfriends... every 3-6 months we'll talk on Facebook or something. But most of them I haven't spoken to in years.
As far as I know FI isn't in contact with any of his exes (doesn't wanna be, haha). He has fewer serious exes as well though. No one that he'd want to stay friends with.
I'm Facebook friends with several and wouldn't mind meeting up for lunch with a few of them if they happened to be in town. In the spring, I also work with one of them, and he's in the same wide group of friends, so I see him fairly frequently. We don't really talk any more than just sharing pleasantries, though.
I think DH is Facebook friends with some of them, but he wouldn't seek out meeting with them. He's also BFFs with a girl he had the BIGGEST crush on for several years, but that's all completely gone now. She's been dating his best friend for a few years, and she was also a bridesmaid at our wedding.
I keep in touch with one ex by choice. He's a very good friend now and married to someone. They live in Seattle and he and I will come across each other now and then on the internet (facebook, hotmail chat or whatever). We'll catch up and talk every couple days for maybe a week and then won't talk to each other again for like years. My FI doesn't like that this ex and I are good friends but I just tell him there are no feelings like that for him anymore, he's just someone I care for as a friend and that's it.
I have another ex that we run into each other not by choice. He and I have mutual friends. I try to stay friendly with him when we are around each other but honestly I'd like to punch him in the face.
My FI doesn't think exes can be friends once they break up. I have a different mindset though. I think that just because 2 people didn't work out as a couple doesn't mean they can't be friends. I don't even think about my ex that I'm friends with in a sexual way. I don't even think about our relationship when I talk to him, I just view him as a great guy who I'm friends with, just like any other guy friend.
It's all a personal opinion though. Some people can't get past the hurt or whatever. For me it depends on how the relationship was, was it toxic and violent (like fighting all the time not abusive violent) or was it just "they aren't the right person for me".
I have no contact with my only ex. I think it is best that way as I'm sure if we would see each other, it would not end well.
SO on the other hand is sort of friends with a girl he used to like. It irritates me because she doesn't really make much of an effort to be friends with me which makes me feel like she is hiding something from me. But whatever.
No - and that goes for both of us.
We are lucky to have no ties. Post break up - there are no longer any mutual friends. I think his ex does live close enough that we could potentially run into her if we ventured out of our little local area, but so far so good. ;) It's really nice to just not have to think about that person ever again.
95% no. I'm still FB friends with my first boyfriend and we play catch up every like year through gchat, I'm still FB friends with some of the guys I dated but not seriously and we also play catch up every so often. But, my 2 major relationships - 1 of them, I'm not friends with anymore for many, many reasons - and the other, the ex right before my FI, I realized while we were dating that we were just dating and not friends and there was no reason to try to be friends with him, it was hurtful for me and it would have been hurtful to my FI. So I ended that "friendship," as well.
i kept in touch with some of my exes just through texting and stuff for a few years until i met my FI. now i just feel no reason to even have them as friends anymore, and i know my fiancé would be a little uncomfortable with it anyway. he also doesn't have contact with any of his exes and i'm truly happy that neither of us do. it feels good to totally let go of the past and focus on our future.. and remember the fact that they are exes for a reason!
Minimally. We both have sons (now college students) so some communication with our exes is unavoidable. But friendships with exes? Nope, neither of us.
My FI does not comunicate with any exes in any way, not fb friends or anything. I only remained in contact with any exes from "relationships that don't count", so high school exes where we had friendships prior and after the relationship.
I am not friends with any exes after high school where the relationships tended to be more serious. I'm also not friends or in contact with any exes where their only basis in my life was solely from our dating. If I wasn't friends before the relationship and they weren't part of my social circle before or after, then I no longer have contact.
I don't believe you can be friends with an ex until first cutting all contact until both parties are completely over the relationship, so more often then not, those that were never a part of my social circle except for when they were dating me, no contact was ever re-established. And I would find it weird to suddenly start contacting them.
ETA: those few exes I'm still in contact with, I only ever see when the whole group from high school get together, which is mostly only for things like weddings or funerals. Otherwise I don't really have much contact with them.
No. They weren't just bad partners, they were bad friends. There's a reason we left them and didn't keep contact.
My best friend is an ex of mine, we were dated for around a year but this was over ten years ago. FI isn't jealous and in fact thinks it's funny that we ever dated in the first place because we were clearly ment to be best friends.
I am still in contact with my most recent ex, we were together for 5 years. However we aren't super friendly or anything we are facebook friends and text each other once a year to wish the other a happy birthday. I think FI may be a little jealous but the ex lives across the country so she knows there is nothing to worry about and I always tell FI when we text.
I occasionally talk to my high school boyfriend. One of my exs and I were good friends before we dated but didn't click romantically and split on good terms. He's still one of my best friends. Another ex I'd known since childhood and we also split on good terms so we still keep in touch. He and DH get along very well. DH doesn't talk to his exs at all.
He doesnt have any exes and pretty much allmy exes are still friends. I have never ended a relationship on bad terms, even my exhusband and I are good friends, he"ll be at our wedding.
We do. We've gone out to a party and my 2 of ex's were there. One actually offered my FI cooking tips, which was funny because DH was a chef at a restaurant for awhile and the ex couldn't make cereal. I kind of have to as well with my daughter's father. He also keeps in touch with his ex. She's actually really nice and we're pretty friendly.
Eh, I have to talk to one of mine because we have a daughter together. I am on good terms with two of mine though. One lives in Newfoundland with his girlfriend and the other lives in town. We never see each other in person just once in a while we will talk on facebook and see how each other is doing. I don't think that my fiance talks to any of his ex's
As far as i am aware he has no contact with any exes. We bump into his one every once in awhile but we only ever talk to her husband because we like him.
I am on friendly terms with most of my exes.
I don't have any exes. My husband has one ex. He's friendly with her and talks to her every now and then, but no phone calls or hanging out really. Just FB and when they run into each other.
@thiswillbemyusername: Facebook.
I would meet up with them if I were in their respective countries too.
I occasionally talk to my ex, but it's so few and far between. When we talk it's like we're old high school friends that lost track of each other ("how have you been?" "how is your job?") and it's in no way like we used to be romantically connected.
My BF however is very connected to his Ex's. His ex wife he talks to once a month or so. His ex girlfriend is about 2 - 3 times a week. He used to talk to his very first GF every now and then, but she started being crazy, so he told her to not contact him again.
Gross, no.
I tried to stay friends with my first boyfriend, but he couldn't handle it. My last ex...needs to disappear forever.
FI's ex is batshit crazy and treated him the same way my ex treated me. He's too nice and helped her move over an hour away, took her out to dinner, let her cry on his shoulder, etc. after they broke up (I had to talk him out of driving the hour+ to go see her one night when she "had a really bad day"!), but afaik, they haven't spoken in years. I'd like to keep it that way, after the way she treated him and what she did to me.
One of FI's female friends got into an argument with me over staying friends with your exes because she's friends with all of hers (she didn't understand why I was vehemently against FI staying in contact with his ex). I explained to her that when you have a bad relationship and a bad breakup, it's in one's best interest to cut contact. Apparently she didn't know that their relationship was as bad as it was, nor that his ex cheated on him (despite being "good friends" with his ex)? Oops. She does now.
Now, if the situation was ideal? "We just didn't work out romantically, but we get along great and make great friends," then yes, I can understand that. But coming out of an abusive relationship? No.
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