Do you believe in Fate? Destiny? Things happening for a Reason?

posted 2 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 2
Member
3531 posts
Sugar bee

saschasoulrebel:  After quitting my old job, and picking up the pieces of my life (got out of a terrible relationship a few months before I quit the job).  I applied to work at the same job my now husband worked at.  And while I don’t remember meeting him until March, he swears up and down he introduced himself the very first day I started working there.  He hit on me for a month before we went out.  Originally I wasn’t even going to go out, until my friend who was also a co-worker convinced me to go with them and the rest is history.

Post # 3
Hostess
8680 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

I think it’s nice to believe in those types of things, and I think that they really do help some people get through rough times, but I personally don’t believe in fate, destiny, soulmates or any of those types of things. I think it could happen, but I also feel like they are so overused.

If there were to be a thing, such as soul mates for instance – it would be an extreme rarity that someone would actually run into and fall in love with theirs, which is really sad when you think about it, because 99% of people would never find theirs. In my lifetime I’ve known around 20 people or so that supposed “found” their soulmate, and guess what, they didn’t stay together any longer than a couple who doesn’t believe in them.

I think fate, destiny, soulmates and the like are all what you make of them. I prefer to write my own destiny.

Post # 4
Member
10988 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

I’m what most commonly would be referred to as an evangelical Christian, and I believe in the sovereignty of God but also the free will of human beings. I believe that God has a plan for each person’s life and that the individual has free will as to whether or not he or she will follow God.  However, one of the most fascinating and wonderful things about this is that (Christianity teaches, and I believe ) God ultimately can use even a person’s all-out rebellion and rejection of Him for that individual’s good, God’s glory, and the benefit of others, if, at some point in time, the person eventually turns to God.

So, I believe that destiny is determined by the choices we make, as they relate to God’s plan for our lives.

Post # 5
Member
3195 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

saschasoulrebel:  

Absolutely. 

My husband and I met on a blind date. It was the week I turned 25. Neither of us were expecting to find true love on a blind date and we weren’t even looking for partners. Fate brought my husband to this city when the company he once worked for transferred him from Calgary to Toronto. If that transfer did not happen, my husband and I would not have met. 

I was having a lot of problems at work until my therapist and my husband suggested that I go back to school. As soon as I finished college, I started to find far more reputable places to apply for employment. Now I work in the medical field and I couldn’t be happier. 

Destiny can only do so much. It can point us in the right direction but we have to take the first steps on our own. 

Post # 6
Member
8518 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2014

I would like to, but I dont. I’ve seen too much bad stuff happen to good people, and too much good stuff happen to bad people. 

Post # 7
Member
254 posts
Helper bee

Not sure I believe in fate as such but my SO and I often say we are ‘meant to be’. After I started dating my SO we realised all these past connections before we met.

1. He helped to build one of the apartments I lived in (4 yrs before we met).

2. He worked with one of my housemates and she knew him a year before I met him (I never met him in that time).

3. I used to work at a bakery and years later we realised he was one of my customers. 

4. He is 7 yrs older than me and used to work at a camp where I went when I was at school LOL that ones a bit weird. 

Then, we officially met 4 yrs ago and started dating straight away.. 

Sometimes I think it might have been fate but other times I think maybe it’s just a heap of coincidences! 

Post # 8
Member
273 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2025

saschasoulrebel:  I don’t believe in destiny or fate, but I’ll admit that things do happen for a reason and timing is everything! I was a serial relationship person until a few years ago when I stopped dating and focused on myself. Had I met my FI any earlier, I would either be in a relationship or not be the person I was (when we first met).

Post # 9
Member
5232 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 2050

saschasoulrebel:  Nope, not at all. I believe our decisions lead us to where we are. Sometimes other peoples’ decisions correspond to ours and we end up in the same place at the same time. My husband and I decided to go to the same club one night. If we hadn’t, I don’t believe that either 1) we would have met up under some other circumstance because we were destined to be together OR 2) the rest of my life would be miserable and meaningless because I missed out on my fate. Our lives would have both gone on and maybe we’d have met someone else compatible, maybe not. Fortunately, we’ll never know because we DID decide to go to that club, and I DID decide to hit on that hot babe across the crowded room, and he DID decide he wanted to have sex with me too. Then over breakfast, we both decided there was a little more to each other, decided we liked each other, respected each other, communicated well with each other, etc. 3 years later, we decided to have unprotected sex even though I had gone off the pill (had an appointment for an IUD), and then decided we wanted to get married, raise our child together, and grow old together. In the 18 years since then, we’ve made lots of other decisions that resulted in us still being together and still being happy together. I give the two of us credit, not destiny.   I guess I believe in “luck” — meaning sometimes things we have no control over might tilt things in a good way or a bad way, but I don’t think that’s fate. That’s just how the world works. Maybe for some people things go their way more often, and for others things don’t go their way. But for the most part, I believe human actions and decisions are the main driver.

Post # 10
Member
2419 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

I really believe that everything happens for a reason.

I sat next to my FI in our College Algebra class our senior year of high school. I was dating someone else at the time but became pretty good friends with my now FI.

Fast forward 3.5 years, the crazy relationship I was in with my ex was coming to an end and my now FI randomly came in to the store that I work at. We found out that we literally lived like 2 miles away from each other and agreed that we should hang out sometime. Stupid me, I tried again to make things work with the guy that I had been dating since high school. My ex and I ended up getting in a HUGE fight and I realized I was worth so much more than what I was getting from that guy.

A few weeks later, my now FI messaged me on Facebook and asked if I was still seeing said guy and if I wasn’t if we could hang out. We made plans to hang out the next day and we literally have been inseperable since then.

I honestly believe had he not come in to the store that night, I would still be in the vicious cycle of emotional abuse that I was stuck in.

Post # 11
Member
329 posts
Helper bee

Yes and No. I think life has too many variables. I met my husband through work (we are both lawyers) and sometimes I think about the fact that it only happened because I had been given that particular case.. only because I had chosen to work at that particular firm.. because I had chosen to become a lawyer. 

Would I have met and married DH if I worked in any other profession? Probably not. So I suppose I could say that shows things had happened for a reason.

BUT, I actually moved to the coutry I live and work in now at the age of 12.. because my parents made that decision. If we had stayed in the UK.. what would I have become?

I know for certain, despite how much I am in love with DH, that I would have grown up and met someone, married someone, had children with someone. So I don’t believe in soulmates and I just think life is too complicated – my life has been affected by not only my choices but others as well. 

Post # 12
Member
829 posts
Busy bee

I believe sometimes we get lucky and angels push us in the right direction…

but I’ve seen too many undeserved bad things happen to  good people, so I cannot believe that everything happens for a reason.

Post # 13
Member
80 posts
Worker bee

Absolutely. Early this year I was at my breaking point with an 8 year relationship. It wasn’t working for a long time, and I was finally starting to feel like it was time end it. We took one last vacation to see if any sparks would come back, and they didn’t. I knew when we got back I had to break up with him but I had no idea how I would do it, or what I would do after the fact (we owned a house together). I was also really hating my job and just overall feeling extremely stuck in all areas of life. 

Back from the trip for 3 days, and I was laid off with severance which gave me enough time to find a new job back in my home town and just kind of get my things together so I could leave. I found an amazing job that I am totally in love with, and off I went, and the relationship came to it’s end quite effortlessly and mutually. It absolutely felt like the closing of a chapter and as if everything worked out just as it should. 

Then after a few months of dating, and having a short fling come to an end that left me feeling a bit wounded, I just made a wish for the type of person I’ve wanted all along. The next day, there he was. Literally exactly what I’ve been searching for and wishing my ex would have been. 

When I look back to where I was a year ago, it just blows my mind. I wrote a journal entry this time last year, wishing that I could be out of that relationship, out of that job, and back near my family and getting into a healthy relationship with someone I could see myself marrying… and, here I am. 

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