Post # 1
I’ve noticed a lot of comments like “I know I’m going to get flamed for this…” or “I know this will get taken down…” before saying a statement/opinion.
Do you actively censor what you say on WB as to not have a hive of angry bees sting you? Do you do it more than IRL?
I don’t – I just assume everyone is open-minded and can entertain an idea/thought that they disagree with, but I know sometimes that assumption can be dead wrong.
What about you?
Post # 3
@MrsBluth: Most of the time I don’t care if it offends, but sometimes I’ll start a post or comment and just be like…no point making a fuss.
Post # 4
If it’s someone engagement ring that they’re sharing and clearly so excited/proud of it, and I hate it, I’m not going to tell them that. There is absolutely no reason for that.
If someone is being an asshole, yeah I’ll call them out.
Post # 5
It depends. If someone wants to show off their ring or dress, and I have nothing good to say, I don’t comment on the thread. I don’t give false compliments; I just refrain from saying anything.
If someone wants help deciding on a ring or dress or wants to discuss a particular style, then I’m going to say exactly what I think.
Of course, this applies to things besides dresses or rings, but it’s an example.
ETA: I don’t generally use personal attacks in my posts. They’re just not necessary and don’t appeal to me. It’s not so much about the individual poster as it is the idea behind the post. I can think of one exception where I was actually mad.
Post # 6
I kind of have to if I don’t want to get banned. There have been many times where I would have loved to just flat out tell someone they’e an asshole or too stupid to live.
Post # 7
Yes because I’ve been warned that I will get banned if I don’t play nice.
Post # 8
I don’t censor my thoughts or feelings unless I’m worried someone is going to be offended by it.
So I don’t jump on a dress thread and go “It’s okay, that dress would be hideous on anyone! Don’t feel bad about your small boobs and HUGE hips! Lay off the Doritos and get some basic taste! Then find a new dress!”
Because that would make me a fucking awful human!
But if someone asks “Hey, I’m thinking of putting my registry information inside my wedding invite”, I’m DEFINITELY going to say “Well, that’s frowned on where I’m from. I hear it’s acceptable in the South/Canada/Australia, though!”, despite that some people are going to be like “You’re such an Emily Post reading slattern! Chill down, Miss 1950 Etiquette Book!”
Post # 9
@MrsBluth: I do sometimes. I’ve had flurries of angry responses and mean-spirited PMs that made me realize I don’t care enough to deal with the vitriol that’s spewed my way when I’m frank. If I know a response will be controversial, I just click the back button and don’t contribute.
In real life, I’m blunt, but diplomatic. On the internet, tone doesn’t translate well. I’ve been accused of being catty on here and I’ve literally thought “wut? lol” and moved on. People on the internet can be sensitive about the stupidest things, and they will whiteknight a topic to death. I can dish it and I can take it, but I generally choose to ignore drama since I come on the Bee for distraction.
Post # 10
If someone is looking for an opinion on dresses and I hate the dress I’m not going to tell they it looks terrible, I will just tell them it isn’t my style (or just not comment).
However, if someone is being a jerk I’m not going to candy coat things for them.
Post # 11
@strawbabies: LOL! Best response.
Post # 12
It just depends. If someone is showing off the engagement ring or wedding dress that they have already bought then I will compliment them no matter what because it’s obvious that they love it, and there’s no reason to diminish their self esteem and confidence in what they chose. If someone is asking for an opinion on something I definitely tell the truth. I generally don’t try to get snarky or post things that I think could start an argument because internet arguments are stupid IMO.
Post # 13
@BrandNewBride: +1 for use of slattern! 🙂
Post # 14
I definitely censor my thoughts. I try and remind myself that there are real people on here. I admit I like to dish stuff out but can’t take it hahaha. So I try to be nice (mostly).
This is also a heavily moderated forum and threads get shut down fast so there isn’t really much point in being super bitchy.
Post # 15
I don’t feel WB is as open-minded as you may think. I have some very strong opinions against some things I’ve seen on here and I just keep them to myself. Not because I am non-confrontational, but because I have seen people be “ganged up on” for silly things like termanology, honest opinions (NOT BASHING), etc.
I think there are a LOT of truly well-spoken, well-educated, polite, kind women on here. I have gotten some EXCELLENT advice on a few things 🙂 But there are also a lot catty snots with nothing better to do than start drama….
Post # 16
Very. It does feel very stifling and it took me a while to get used to the rules here (very different than other forums I’ve been on) but on the plus side, they are usually evenly applied to everyone so even though they’re not the kind of rules I would like best, they’re pretty fair.