- 4 years ago
- Wedding: October 2015
So BF and I went to his best friend’s wedding in Raleigh over the weekend. After the reception, there was an afterparty being held at the bride and groom’s hotel. The bride and groom themselves were attending.
I was really surprised by this because all of the weddings I’ve been to (admittedly, I’ve only been to four weddings before this one and they were all Baptist weddings, so I don’t know if that makes a difference) there was never an afterparty. Wait, I take that back. I did go to one Baptist wedding that had an afterparty. Anyway. This weekend, I declined to go to the afterparty because honestly, I am an introvert. After several hours of parties, loud noise and lots of people, I’ve had enough and I need a break.
I was talking to BF about this on the way home and we started discussing our future wedding. I said that I did not want an afterparty.
I was surprised that the bride and groom did not leave immediately after the reception to begin enjoying their new life as newlyweds! To me, the reception is the time that you spend with your guests. Why wouldn’t you want private time with your new husband after the reception? I don’t really understand why some brides want an afterparty to hang even more with their guests and wedding party. If it were me, I would be so excited about my new husband that I would want to immediately begin our married life together and privately.
However, I know that my opinion is not the norm. If you want to have an afterparty, that’s totally cool and more power to you. I mean no disrespect to those that choose to have an afterparty. It’s just not for me.
I told BF that when our time comes, I don’t want an afterparty. He was taken aback by this. He wanted an afterparty. He thought it would be fun to go hang out with the groomsmen for an hour after the reception, just to chill and relax. Then after his time with the boys, then he would come to me and we could leave for our hotel room/honeymoon.
I was shocked by this. I don’t want to hang out with just my bridesmaids for an hour after the reception! I want to spend time with my new husband. When the day comes, I’ll have spent almost the entire day with my bridesmaids as well as the previous night. BF would be spending the night and day with the groomsmen before the wedding. Why does he need an hour after the reception to hang out with them when he could be enjoying wedded bliss with his new wife??
Lol, anyway. We actually got into a brief argument about this yesterday. Don’t worry though, we’ve resolved it and made up since then. If you’ve read my post today on the Waiting board, you’ll see just how well we made up 🙂 And yes, I’m aware how stupid it was to argue about this given that we are not even engaged yet and our wedding will not be for at least two years. Lol but sometimes, you just get into stupid arguments.
Anyway. BF realized how unhappy I would be if we had an afterparty. Mainly because I am such an introvert and I can’t handle having that many parties in one day. And also because I can’t imagine not being with my new husband right after the reception. So he said “I want you to be happy, so don’t worry. We will not have an afterparty when we get married.”
So what is the tradition in your area? Do you frequently attend afterparties after the reception? If you’re married, did you have an afterparty? Why or why not?