Do you ever feel guilty about switching jobs?

posted 3 years ago in Career
Post # 2
Member
2455 posts
Buzzing bee

HoneysHoney:  I felt totally guilty leaving my last job. They were so good to me, I learned a lot, had great benefits and pay (my new job is great too).

They promoted me and mentored me and gave me plenty of responsibility. I was dreading telling my sweet boss I had to leave (moving with FI). They do understand it’s nothing personal and it’s really just business.

I just made sure to thank them profusely and let them know what a great impact they had on my career.

Post # 3
Member
1566 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

HoneysHoney:  Is there a position in the company you’d prefer over what you have? Maybe you can make a lateral move?

Post # 4
Member
5204 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

HoneysHoney:  I feel exactly like this right now.  I’m going to talk to someone about another job this afternoon and I feel so bad.  My boss has been so good to me and so supportive and I do love the company, but I’m a little bored of my work and want something new.  

Post # 5
Member
9137 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

HoneysHoney:  I had the same concern when I resigned from my last position to take my current one.  I loved my job, my boos, my co-workers, etc…. But I wanted more money and I was interested in another related field.  I typed up a very polite letter explaining how much I had learned and appreciated working for them but I was resigning to pursue other endeavors.  When I met with my boss to resign I gave her the letter.  I work in a tight knit community so they were disappointed that I had been lured away but we were able to maintain a great working relationship so that I can still work with them at my new job.

Post # 6
Member
4483 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

As a nanny, yes, very much so. But I can’t not leave either.

Post # 7
Member
1179 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

HoneysHoney:  I’m going through the same thing right now — DH and I are relocating, and I found a job in the new city that I’m excited about. But my current job has just been so, SO wonderful, and my boss so supportive and awesome, that it is an absolute wrench to leave. Not to mention that it’s something of a change in direction, career-wise, and I always worry (irrationally) about dissappointing/betraying my mentors when I follow a different path from theirs.

Ultimately I think you should not have to feel apologetic about making career choices that are best for you/your family. In the long run, it is not in your employer’s best interest for you to stay there out of guilt when you need to move on, and it’s certainly not in your best interest. This is what’s getting me through my current bout of guilt, but I feel you, OP, it is rough.

Post # 8
Member
1802 posts
Buzzing bee

I’m a nanny, and I haven’t encountered this yet, but I know that I’ll definitely feel guilty when the time comes for me to find a new position. The only real reason i will leave my current family is when I transition from part to full time, but I know that in a personal relationship like that some families would view it as betrayal. Some people don’t realize that as much as I would love to work for nothing and stay with my current family I just can’t, so money is a driving factor. 

Post # 9
Member
9949 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

I left one teaching job for another in late November of last year, and it was SO hard.  The charter school where I worked was told to close by January, and so we all applied for new jobs.  Then the school was allowed to stay open till June…which we found out the day after I accepted the new position.  The kids felt so betrayed and I felt awful, but in the end I made the best decision professionally for myself.  I have stability at my new job and I love it.  I keep in touch with some of the students from the other school and am going to their  graduation.  I feel like I’m more in my element now, too, because I work with 3rd to 5th graders instead of middle/high school.  

So.  Do what you gotta do for you!  Good luck.

Post # 10
Member
2225 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

Yes. 3 weeks ago I left my job in the ER and moved to L&D at a different hospital that’s within the same health system. There was a lot of turnover in the ER and I feel bad because they were relying on me as one of the more experienced nurses- they have been hiring a lot of new grads that just don’t have enough experience yet. The ER just wasn’t for me and my contract was up, and a position in L&D- my dream job- was open, so I went for it. I could tell my boss was disappointed that I was leaving, and I miss my coworkers terribly, and I hate feeling stupid like I don’t know anything in this new position, but… it is worth it for me in the end.

Post # 11
Member
191 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

I also felt guilty when I left my job working with high school students but I knew I wanted to try out the college level. I think I would just approach it by saying that while you sincerely appreciate the opportunity to have worked there, you would like to expand on your skills and experiences through a different environment. Not a pro here though, just some friendly advice! 🙂 

Post # 12
Member
2092 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

 

HoneysHoney:  Never. There is usually a good reason why I am leaving a job for another one. Even if it’s just a money thing, well…money talks. Moving on is a part of life for us all.

Post # 13
Member
2065 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

HoneysHoney:  every single time!!! in fact ive moved 3 times to different departments in this hospital so i run into them eventually. and some call me a traitor! but in a fun way. its always been moving up. i couldnt afford not to take the next position

Post # 14
Member
167 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

I’m glad I’m not the only own who feels like this!! I am also going through this right now! I will be relocating next week to be with FI, but wasn’t planning to look for jobs there until probably the fall. A previous clinical site of mine (from school) reached out to me with a good job opportunity, so I took it. As excited as I am to be closer to FI and to work with what I know is a good group of people at the new place, I was very upset and felt guilty about the decision to leave my current job. This is my first job out of school, it is a great setting (exactly what I wanted), good people, great facilities, learning experiences, etc. I immediately felt as if I was letting down my boss and coworkers in my department. FI did not understand at all, as it is all business to him.

Now, as things get closer, all of my coworkers are supportive and wish me well. They all understand and it is easier to feel excited about the new place. Of course I’m still terribly sad to say goodbye…if only I weren’t such an emotional person! lol

Post # 15
Member
4483 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

I just stumbled upon this thread to find out I already posted on it. I’m in the leaving boat again, and hopefully soon. This time I went back to adult psychiatric case management, but many of our clients are childlike and can get attached quickly. Unlike my previous nanny position, I can’t keep in touch either. The girl I took care of for 3 years is still very much in my life and will be in my wedding, but it’s never appropriate to have a relationship if any kind outside if the case manager/consumer one in my professional job, so once I leave I say goodbye to 30+ people that have become part of my life. 

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