I am a regular bee, posting anonymously...I LOVE my FI and cannot wait to marry him, but sometimes I miss being single...I miss the excitement and rush of meeting someone new...that high feeling you get...the butterflies....I met my FI fairly young at 23 and was so caught up at the time in meeting someone that I sometimes wish I just enjoyed the dating phase more...ugh I dunno :(
Meh. The dating scene isn't for me. I never knew how to meet people. I'm thrilled I don't have to worry about it!
Nope. And honestly FI gives me butterflies. It's been 11 years. He's so dang fine and romantic and surprises me all the time. I am still smitten!
No, but sometimes it feels weird to think that's over for good. But I'm happy to move on to the new phases of my life. I see it like this: sometimes I might get nostalgic for my teen years, but when I honestly think about it, I don't want to go back to highschool either :)
I met my FI when I was 23 as well (4 years ago) and I've never missed being single.
@bowsergirl: yea I understand a ton of people HATE dating and probably more people than not will agree with you lol
@OEC: definitely...I think it's all in your mindset and approach to dating....if you go into it with limited expectations and dont put pressure on yourself I think you would enjoy it more
I'm so glad I don't have to be a part of the singles scene! I love having someone that completely understands me and makes me feel safe and comforted. The whole dating scene was too much for me. I'm more reserved and quiet and I just hated dealing with creepy guys and guys who only wanted to hook up:(!
Not even a little! I met my FI when I was 18. When I turned 22, I had an identity crisis, and questioned all my choices. I was worried I was with him because I had always been with him, and was afraid I had missed out on my college years. I had never even had a one night stand!
We broke up for 9 months and I... did nothing. Went out on a few dates, didn't like any of them, and didn't do any of the crazy things I set out to. It turned out that I had dated FI for 4 years because I was madly in love with him. I had never had a one night stand because, well, I just wasn't very interested in guys without an emotional conection.
FI took the time to date too, and he came to the same conclusion as I did at the same time. When we got back together (a year later), we both knew we wanted to marry the other person (even though we wanted another 3 years before we got engaged).
I just really like being in a relationship and I was HORRIBLE at being single.
Eh sometimes I do miss it a little TBH. I love my FI and am really thankful that I have him, especially since I did date a lot of people before we started dating (we were friends first). I mainly miss the complete freedom more than dating. Not that my FI controls what I do-he is so supportive of me doing new things and exploring life as much as possible... I just hold back a little without realizing it because I want to spend as much time with him as possible. :)
I said sometimes, but I don't miss the dating scene or anything like that. I just miss the "freedom" to do whatever I want, whenever I want. But SO gives me that too, so I'm really just being silly during the small amount of time I think about it :]
Sometimes! For sure! I adore and love my fiance and can't wait to marry him, but sometimes I think about how I'll never have the excitement of the chase or the total independence etc. I think it's totally normal :)
I don't miss being single and looking for love, no way. Sometimes I miss being single, and being content with self-discovery, and having personal adventures. I suppose I could do those now, but I always have to think about them in the context of what our weekend will be like, because we see each other so little as it is, I don't want to miss him! That in and of itself is annoying, but it has nothing to do with my husband so much as it has to do with the crappy work hours his job gave him for the time being.
I don't miss being single in terms of dating at all, but the other day I was talking with someone about an idea I had about a book to write (would require moving across country and enrolling in an interesting program), and I realized - yeah, that's not something that's likely to happen now! And I can't just make that decision on my own anymore.
The reality is, I was unlikely to do it anyway. And I'd way rather have a life with FI over that. But it was just a sort of "Whoa... this is real, I have to make major life decisions with another person" moment. I knew it intellectually but hadn't had that emotional moment yet.
I actually liked being single, but I still never miss it. I have just never been happier than I am with my husband. I did miss it in previous relationships, though.
I feel like it sometimes, and then my lover does something amazing and it's like..nope, he's perfect. Everyone else is no bueno! I met him at 20.
The only real regret I have is that I was just starting to gain my confidence as an adult, growing out of a lot of younger insecurities, when I met FI. So I wonder what dating would have been like for the 'new and improved me'.
That said... I think FI has played a major part in helping me to see how awesome I am (his words! lol), so in the end... I don't really miss it. I had some good times the year before I met FI and I was pretty much done with that scene.
Nope! I guess I know what you mean about the butterflies because the feeling of being pursued is nice, but good lord I am so glad I never have to be single again. FH is the most amazing guy I've ever met and the thought of not being with him makes me sick. I don't know that your thoughts are necessarily bad but.....I can't relate.
okay he just walked in the room randomly, looked at me and said "you're gorgeous" and walked out...now I feel terrible for posting this!!! It's not that I think I would want to be married to anyone else in the world...it's just that I wish I didn't put so much pressure on myself to meet someone at that point in my life. I went out with a group of single girlfriends last night for the first time in a long time...and I know it sounds dumb but I kind of just missed having guys approach me without feeling guilty about it...I agree with what many of you have said also - pretty spot on - about sometimes wanting some time to yourself to do "whatever the hell you want to do" without having to worry about someone else as well, but mostly I just miss being able to go out and be a flirt!
i do not miss being single at all... i love my fiance and can't imagine myself marrying anyone else... we got a dog 6 months after dating, moved in together at 8 months, got engaged at 1 year and 6 months together and we still talk about random sutff and laugh together... i can't imagine marrying anyone else..
Nope. I sowed my wild oats before him and he did the same. I had actually met him at a point where I had just given up on men. We have been dating since we were both 22 but since we both dated a fair amount and he had even been married before it didn't feel like we were missing out on anything. In fact for me at least it felt refreshing to met someone who wasn't full of bullsh*t and always playing games, and I he felt the same way about me.
I guess sometimes its trippy to think this is it this is the guy unless something bad happens but when I think back at my experiences in the past, I remember that the grass is not greener on the other side.
ETA: I do get the freedom thing but on the other hand I made this choice and I did it with my heart. I know that my heart is much happier planning things with him than without him. If it wasn't the case I would be single. He doesn't limit me or prevent me from doing things in fact he encorages me to. I once told him that I would love to go work in Antartica (I was only half kidding) but I would need to be there for months. He said well if that's what you wanna do that's fine when you get back we'd have a lot of fun! I don't know if its because we were long distance for a while too that maybe its like that. If he had to move somewhere temporarily and make a bunch of money it would be fine with me too. Now if we have kids it would totally be a different story. Kids are really when you can't just get up and go.
I voted "sometimes" and only because I enjoyed being able to be completely free, plan any events without the possibility of having competing plans with my SO.
eta: I also miss free drinks at bars- so much more difficult when you're with someone- unless someone buys you drinks platonically- hah.
@lstyle25: I think you may have missed my point a little based on your explanation but that's okay :)
@h0ney: Haha yeah- and I get mad at my SO when he buys me too many drinks at the bar- I say, "Save it for vacation!"
@nineteen87: That's why we love happy hour!! Otherwise we just stay at home and make drinks.
I don't go out to bars very much without him here. I'm still new to the area and haven't met a whole bunch of people yet.
Sometimes but I think that is because I haven't ever really been single. DH and I have been dating since we were 14. I love him with all my heart and I know I would be miserable without him but occasionally I wonder. I think I would be bad at dating though so I am thankful I don't have to do it! :p
I'm 34 and getting married for the first time in 6 months. So, I was single for a long time.... and I don't miss it. :)
Nope. I hated dating, I hated being alone, I hated being unsure. I dated soooo many guys too and it was always stressful. I love having the comfort of knowing my DH is always here and that I get to spend everyday with my best friend, I love never having to be alone the most.
Occasionally, because I totally get a rush from flirting and stuff, and new flings are always so hot...
Then I remember that every time I've tried to go on a real official date with someone I don't already know well, it's been horrible, and it takes me ages to really trust someone, etc. and most of the time I'm honestly relieved to be off the market.
Like others have said, I don't miss being single - I miss being able to go on a holiday without having to plan it around his work. I miss that if I do go on a holiday on my own, then I miss him heaps, so even that little freedom is gone. I also miss the 'alone time' where I could have a day off and just veg out or go off and do something, rather than have someone else's plans to fit in with.
Having said that, though, I absolutely love my fiance and cannot imagine my life without him. I don't miss being single/dating. I never dated before meeting fiance - we didn't even date all that much! We were friends for years, then fell in love that way, and I can honestly say I'm quite glad to have missed all that dating 'getting to know you' stuff that I see other friends go through.
I said never because I've never really thought about it until this post lol
I had a fun life as a single gal. Even though I didn't date much (I only had 2 "official" relationships before FI), being out there mingling/unofficially dating with other men trying to find the right guy just didn't feel right. It felt awkward for me lol. However, as soon as FI and I started "talking" I was done, he was the one for me.
I was just having this coversation with my fiance. I am 35 and about to enter my first marriage. I was single for a long time, meaning no boyfriend, but I dated a lot. I must say, dating was so much fun! I truly enjoyed the socialization, company and fun activites with the opposite sex. But then again, I am a social butterfly. I used to tell my mom I wish I could take all my favorite qualities of each date and create my one perfect man. I still remember the rush of getting ready to go out at night and not knowing how the evening would end. Good or bad - the unknown was always exciting for me. Weird, I know.
I believe this feeling is normal. I love my fiance and know for a fact he's my Mr. Right. However, it's like Monica and Rachel said: "It's the end of an era!" so of course we are going to reminisce and miss things once in a long while. My fiance thinks it's absolutely hilarious. It's actually fun to walk down memory lane together and share what our single days were like before we met each other. Add some wine and we always have a good laugh at the people we used to be.
In the end, we both agree that from now on, it's our job to keep things fun and exciting for each other.
I'm 21 and I'm so happy to be married. I hate being single. I just don't find meeting strangers fun. I can see how it could be, but it's just not for me. I love haivng my husband by my side all the time and knowing he'll always be there.
for me it isnt even wanting to date others, its just wanting to do my own thing and learn who i am by myself. i love dh to pieces and wouldnt change a thing. but i got with dh when i was 15 so i have grown with him, and havent grown on my own and become my own person, its wierd and hard to explain.
i don't miss dating at all. it is exhausting and my fiance treats me better than anyone else ever has. i have my days where i miss my "independence" persay, but then i come home to my best friend and realize i wouldn't have it any other way.
I don't miss being single, but I do miss that exciting buzz/build up that you feel when you kiss someone that you've admired for a while.
I was also offered a very good teaching job in London and in the bottom of my heart I would have loved to have taken it - but it doesn't match what we have planned so I'll shelve that dream for now :)
Just wanted to add, it's usually at about 1am on a girls night out when my single friends are depressed they didn't meet anyone, or are sad because 'he promised he'd come out to meet my friends but didn't!' that I feel so so so relived and thankful to have my fiancé.
I voted 'sometimes'; I had a lot of ONS's when younger, and they were a lot of fun, and sometimes I do miss that. I love my OH, love sex with him, and still get butterflies when I look at him; but you simply cannot get the 'buzz' of a one night stand in a long-term relationship, the thrill of seeing what someone is like in bed, the excitement of hooking up with a stranger. So yeah, sometimes I do miss it.
I'd be open to an 'open' relationship/swinging for that reason; but my OH isn't keen on the idea at all.
You must log in to post.
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| hedgehogcatcher | 8 |
| fzesguer | 6 |
 MsChandler |
6 |
| LovesBeingAMrs | 6 |
| abirdword | 5 |
| memo | 5 |
| Cynderbug | 5 |
| misschickpea | 4 |
| Rachel631 | 4 |
| chouette | 4 |
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| kait_anne | 4 |
| ButterflyKisses13 | 2 |
| allyouneedislove | 2 |
| YUNO1 | 2 |
| lettuce | 2 |
| lovelyMsValentine | 2 |
| calendula | 2 |
| abirdword | 1 |
| StephieBee | 1 |
| janetsnakehole | 1 |
