Do you feel badly showing your big/expensive ring?

posted 3 years ago in Rings
Post # 3
Member
855 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2008

No. I don’t feel bad at all. As to how I respond? I say thank you and move on.

Post # 4
Member
600 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@aprilbride26:  If someone is being uncomfortably over the top I usually say thank you and change the subject.

 

Post # 5
Member
1599 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@aprilbride26:  I don’t feel bad. If people want to ooh and ahh and want to know the price, I’ll tell them.

I think most people think mine is fake, anyway. I’m a super budget kind of person (and very low-maintenance, I actually got my first ever pedicure today at the age of 29) so I imagine people assume it’s either not diamonds or is fake given it’s size and quality. Someone actually asked me if it was fake because it looked “too perfect.”

so who cares? rock it out.

Post # 6
Member
293 posts
Helper bee

No. People never feel bad about their BMWs, Mercedes, tiny expensive puppies, or luxury brand purses. Why should you feel bad about your ring? Everyone has difffinances pending preferences. 

Post # 7
Member
1599 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@madelise:  omg I love tiny expensive puppies 😉 

Post # 8
Member
1773 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Yes! I have a 2ct ring w/ halo and diamonds along the sides, which I thought was average, but it seems like friends, strangers, whoever, seem to “compare rings” and there’s is smaller. I had a friend of mine actually hurt really upset at her fiancé for not having as big of a ring and she changed her setting to “match mine” (her words). I find it awkward and uncomfortable, but I still LOVE my ring.

Post # 9
Member
1662 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Nope! I feel happy/proud when someone notices it. Mine is pretty average or slightly small for my social circle but large for my family. Never thought I would be so attached to a piece of jewellery!

Post # 10
Member
293 posts
Helper bee

@Chelwilly:  LOL, I’m sorry, that’s a bit creepy that she changed hers to match yours!!

 

@bkrocks13:  oh girl, if you only knew 😉 hehe. Tiny ANYTHING is heart-melting. Add fur and wagging tails? Eeeee!

@aprilbride26:  honey, if you aren’t showing your friends your ring and out flat showing it’s size and worth off, saying crap like, “don’t you wish yours is as big as mine?!,” you’re FINE! I wear a larger ring than all my friends, and I’m not even engaged. I never shove it in anyone’s face, and only show people when they themselves ask to see it. If someone ASKS to see it, then gets pissed off, that’s their problem! You rock it, and don’t feel negatively towards the symbol of your new commitment to your FI! 

Post # 11
Member
10219 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

Etiquette Snob here… lol

Reply with gracious class.

A simple “Thank You” … and then move on.

IF you know the person well… and they your relationship / Fiance then it is ok in the early days of your Engagement to smile and add something like… “Ya he did good, I think I’ll keep him”

But the general rule of thumb when it comes to ERings (or other possessions) … no matter their size / cost is not to bring attention to them.  And NEVER talk cost, dollars, etc with anyone.  Money is a private matter.  To do so is considered gauche.

Accepting a compliment about “a thing” is an art form… one that should be learned when one is young so it can be carried off artfully one’s whole life.

Hope this helps,

 

Post # 12
Member
7997 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

Not so far.

Post # 13
Member
3368 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 1997

@This Time Round:  You put things perfectly. This is exactly what I would have said, although probably not as eloquently.

Post # 14
Member
1106 posts
Bumble bee

@madelise:  haha! I have all of these and I don’t feel bad at all except sometimes I feel like people judge me for driving a BMW since I’m pretty young but I bought it & pay for it!

but no I usually don’t feel bad about my ring bc it is modest sized but if I know someone elsts ring is of lesser quality or smaller I do feel a little bad. But why should we feel guilty? 

Post # 15
Member
681 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@aprilbride26:  I can relate to feeling awkward in terms of not wanting someone else to feel bad. I don’t like the thought of other people feeling sad or down. 

I find myself hiding my ring, tilting my hand (especially if I think someone really is too interested, I get uncomfortable) .. rather than the way some people tend to enter the room with their left hand.

I get my ‘need’ for staring and admiring my own ring out on wedding bee.  Since I do really love the way it looks 🙂 but I would never want it to be a point of making someone feel bad.  I do however enjoy my shiny things, I have a LV never full tote, chanel sunglasses and cashmere sweaters.  I just like expensive things lol.  Hell… The sheets I’m laying on are 500 thread count.  But to each their own of course. It’s not about other ppl. It’s about what I like.  It’s funny how I’m not connected to other ppls emotions if they feel jealous/envy. But I get attached to if they feel bad/sad. Probably because I don’t like feeling sad and I don’t wish that on ppl. 

 

.. I’m rambling.  

Post # 16
Member
1261 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

yes, I do at times.  Before my dh and I met I worked at a jewelry store and everyone I worked with had large diamond rings….so….when I met my dh I already had my ring picked out, he was financially secure and while my ring isn’t over the top (center stone is 1.12ct twt…smaller pave diamonds on the band) it’s ALOT smaller then a lot of the women I’m around now. I no longer work in a jewelry store (stay at home mom) and I’m really involved with my church now…which I wasn’t before. At church pretty much everyone has a modest wedding set (ring) or just a plain band. I feel out of place with my e-ring and at one point I stopped wearing my e-ring and just wore my plain band.

My dh was upset about that, so I make sure to wear both, but I still feel odd wearing it. He recently bought me a diamond RHR which I LOVE, but don’t wear it to church or other church functions.

So yeah…I know how you feel…:(

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