(Closed) Do you have a "best friend"?

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Other than your SO, do you have a Best Friend?
    Yes I do : (219 votes)
    52 %
    No, I have a close group of girlfriends, but not a "best" friend : (68 votes)
    16 %
    No, I don't have many close girlfriends : (118 votes)
    28 %
    Other, please explain : (14 votes)
    3 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    5221 posts
    Bee Keeper

    I have a group of girlfriends that I consider ” best friends”. There is not one that is more important than the other. Sometimes one is closer to me for a time or I am closer to one for a time, depending on life.

    Hands down- my sister is my true best girl friend. There is no breaking up with her, though πŸ™‚

     

    I don’t think your situation is all the different than a lot of peoples. The older I get the more I realize how HARD it can be to find a good friend– much less a GREAT or BEST friend! I have had friendships blossom fast and then fade out, and I have had some that have really weathered the test of time! Losing friends is always tough, and I lost a good one in the midst of a bad break up about 5 years ago. 

    We have since ” sort of” reconciled, but the break up with the boyfriend was harder. In hindsight, I missed the friendship more than the relationship and reached out to her, if that makes sense. So I do see where the friend/boyfriend comparison can come from to a degree.

    Post # 4
    Member
    4479 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    It sounds like you do have a best friend – your FI.

    Post # 5
    Hostess
    11174 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper

    I didn’t have a best friend for most of my life until 2010. Although we have only known each other for a little over two years we are most definitely best friends and have proven time and time again that we are there for each other.  It is quite possible that you haven’t met that person that will be your bestie as of yet, took me 27 years.

    Post # 8
    Member
    4465 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: February 2012

    I don’t have a best girlfriend right now. I’m in a period of transition in my life, as are most of my close friends, and I know we’re growing into different stages.

    My husband is my best friend and my sister is my best girlfriend (but that’s family, hence my above statement). My sister and I are so close we practically finish each other’s senstences. I feel that women always need other women to lean on, and for that right now I have my sister.

    My mom had a best friend all throughout high school, college, marriage and children and something happened in 2001 and they stopped speaking. She actually passed away a few years ago. In 1996 (after my mother was married and already had children), she met the woman who became her best friend above all other people, I was 6 and this woman and her family became our family, and that woman is still my mom’s best friend (like a sister) and she is like my second mother. I feel lucky that I actually have a sister that I am this close with and I know I will make bonds with other women as I grow older and into other stages of life. Perhaps we’ll even meet because we have children in the same class – as my mother did with her best friend. Unfortunately, sometimes relationships end or fade away, but I feel truly blessed that the ones I have in my life now are pretty premanent. 

    Post # 9
    Member
    5221 posts
    Bee Keeper

    @Kings7911:  I totally get that. I moved in 2010 to a new city/state and knew NO ONE. Ugh– crying was my hobby.

    It has taken me two years to get to the  stage with some women that we hang out alone without our SO’s ( most of them are girlfriends or wives of my husbands friends). It is tough, and I think I took for granted how easy it is to make friends in college or in a setting where everyone is experiencing something new and exciting. Once you’re into adulthood, a lot of groups have already formed so nudging your way in there can be difficult!

    I agree with @Treejewel19: … maybe you just haven’t met ” the one” yet πŸ™‚

    Sounds like you have an awesome SO, though! 

    Post # 10
    Member
    1460 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I have a best friend that I’ve known for over 30 years.  I had another that I met in college but in April of last year after about 20 years that friendship ended.  I did email her a few months later when I heard that her father had cancer and she told me that she had missed me.  That’s when it occurred to me that I hadn’t missed her at all so I knew that I had made the right decision.  I know that sounds cold bit it’s not that I dislike her.  I want her to be happy and have a happy life…I just don’t want to be part of it. 

    Post # 11
    Member
    119 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    My FI is my best friend hands-down, but outside of our relationship, I do have 1 person I consider my “best friend” but he is a man and not a “girlfriend” lol. I have never really gotten along with other women…guess I’m too much of tomboy lol. I don’t enjoy shopping, make-up or getting manicures lol. I do have close girlfriends and we get together every so often for wing nights at a local pub but I wouldn’t consider any of them “best friends”, since none are more special to me than the others. I care for them equally but my best friend I know I can talk to about anything and he is the only one (besides FI) who has seen me cry…family doesn’t even see that lol.

    Post # 14
    Member
    2224 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    I definitely have a best girl friend. She is a soul mate to me, like a sister. For a long time I was like you guys, closed off and walled up to girls. Then I met her and she just warmed my heart. She provides so much support and comfort as well as frustration sometimes, and I her. We’ve been through many hardships and boys and deaths and family drama together. We were meant to be. Like Jay n Silent Bob, we’re hetero lifemates lol. 

    Post # 16
    Member
    2224 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    @Kings7911:  They’re just as up to fate as our SO/FI/DH’s! I think I got lucky with her lol. She drives me crazy sometimes but she’s like family! I love her anyway.

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