Post # 1
So I have a group of friends that are all really close. We have 1 friend that is just a moron and is just getting worse as the years pass. She is a compulsive shopaholic, racks up her credit cards, but doesn’t have 2 dimes to rub together. She has probably got fired from at least 6 jobs in the past 4 years. Everytime I see her, she has had her hair colored, is wearing the lastest outfit displayed at Express and has a new Coach bag. ( A bag that is supposed to carry money yet she doesn’t have any)So a friend of mine is getting married in June; the moron friend, another friend and I will be bridesmaids. My FI and I decided to have a small wedding party, so I didn’t ask her to be a bridesmaid. She couldn’t afford the dress anyways. I know she is a little upset that I didn’t ask her, but I don’t need the aggravation. Plus, I didn’t ask all my close friends, just 1 and another friend of mine who is not part of that group. I know she is giving my bride-to-be friend a hard time about payments on her dress and the trip to Vegas they are supposed to take. I was thinking about just asking her to do a reading at the ceremony. I haven’t asked her yet, but I think she will feel more included in the situation.
How do you deal with your one friend that just a dope?
Post # 3
If she’s that bad, do you want her doing the reading? maybe she could hand out programs to people when they come in. She sounds very irresponsible, will she show if she’s a reader?
Post # 4
I think we all know someone, friend or not, that does things that we don’t necessarily agree with. Does that make them an “idiot”? I dont think so…
I have a friend who is in a pretty bad situation (i.e. 2 kids, no money, hours cut at work, the list goes on…). She’s made a number of choices that I don’t agree with but I would NEVER call her an idiot because she’s one of my best friends and I love her. This friend is a bridesmaid in my wedding even though I know it will probably be difficult for her to afford her dress. I’m fully prepared to cover the costs for her if need be because having her stand up there with me is far more important than the cost of a $150 bridesmaids dress.
Post # 5
@HisIrishPrincess: I think that I woud be able to rely on her for the reading. It would give her a few minutes of attention which she would love. It would also give her a reason to get dolled up.
@UpstateCait:I know calling her an “idiot” isn’t a nice thing to say but when she has put herself in a majority of her messes you can’t help but blame her.
Post # 6
You sound frustrated by her. You need to let go and let her do her own thing.
If you genuinely want her to do a reading and trust that she will be reliable, then allow her to do it. If not, don’t ask her and choose someone else. If she has a problem with not being a part of anything, let it be her problem and not yours.
Post # 7
I know what you mean– I have one that I love to death, but want to ask her what the hell she is thinking on an almost daily basis. I didn’t originally ask her to be a bridesmaid, but when I lost one she offered to fill in. I didn’t say yes or no either way but started to get the whiney “how much is this going to cost me” almost the very next day. If she is repsonsible enough to do a reading or to be in charge of something for the wedding like setting something up, I would explain that you are keeping it small and let her do that.
Post # 8
I have a friend who is a wonderful person and has a lot going on for her but doesn’t have a lot going on upstairs. We’ll call her “Joan”.
One day, Joan wondered what it would be like if you were blind and drove a car. So, on this dirt road leading to the beach near our houses, she tried it and crashed her car into a tree. She learned why they don’t let blind people drive the hard way. I’m going to guess the majority of us could figure it out without actually attempting to do it.
Another time, we were at “Joan’s” house for a BBQ. She decided to make beer can chicken. However, she didn’t know that you had to open the can of beer before shoving it into the chicken. One word – KABOOM.
Post # 9
@BanditGirl: Is her picture in the dictionary next to the word idiot?
Post # 10
Why are you friends with someone who you can’t stop insulting? You don’t sound like you’re a good friend to her, either. If she isn’t someone you want to support and stand up for, why would you have her stand up for you in your wedding?
Post # 11
@crayfish: My thoughts exactly.