Do you have a friend that brings out the worst in you?

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
3016 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014 - Prague

Yes. She + alcohol = Bad Prahajess.

Post # 5
Member
1287 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@sheepandbear:  I have friends that I call upon whom I know will ‘force’ me to drink too much, when I feel like having a good bender, or whom will jump on my ‘bitching bandwagon’, because they chronically ‘bitch’ about all things in life.  Or, friends whom are the BEST at gossiping when I need a good dose of shamelessness.

 

From that standpoint, then yes, I have friends that bring out the ‘worst’ in me, but they always have my back, or better yet, have my best intention at heart, thus making them great friends.  It is what makes various friendships all so special!! 🙂

 

Post # 6
Member
2571 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

I had, emphasis on the “had”. 😉

Post # 8
Member
3016 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014 - Prague

My “bad” friend and I have NOT had each other’s backs. In fact, I “broke up with her” as a friend. Twice. I can’t really say I trust her. These days I try and hold her at arm’s length. But we’re sort of like very dysfunctional sisters.

Post # 9
Member
2368 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I do, though I’ve been distancing myself from her a lot. She’s negative and wants people to be miserable with her. I love her to death for her good qualities (she’s a great listener,  she can be fun to be around, and she stuck with me when my life turned crazy).  The problem is that she’s unhappy, and wants everyone else to be unhappy too. So anything positive gets turned into a negative. Like we bought a house, and her response was ‘that’s going to suck when something breaks’, or when I announced my engagement, her response was ‘well, I suppose you’ll be happy for a while’. I’ve been patient with her and tried to reinforce the positives in her life, but I can’t handle the constant negativity. So I’ve been keeping my distance. 

Post # 10
Member
6407 posts
Bee Keeper

No. I make efforts to avoid having that in my life. I prefer to have fewer people in my life, each worth their weight in gold, than more people, some of them stirring up sh!t when I least need it (and, I’ve found, I really never need it). People like that are just a drain on your time and your good mood. Aren’t those high prices to pay for the meagre benefits they offer? They can also make things messy with your “golden” friends if they’re really manipulative. It’s like gangrene, when you find those crappy people in your life, don’t be shy: Cut, cut, cut!

As they say: You are who you associate with! I can say this and be very proud to have such a statement to live up to!

Post # 11
Member
643 posts
Busy bee

@joya_aspera:  +1. I agree with this – quality over quantity. If I had relationships that added no value to my life (or worse, we’re toxic) then I’d rather not associate with those people. 

However, if by “the worst” you mean can emphasize some of your less than stellar traits in a non-serious way, then I do have a friend who brings out my competitive nature when we play games, participate in sports, etc. 

Post # 12
Member
4641 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@sheepandbear:  No because anyone who brings out the worst in you is not your friend.  I cut toxic people out of my life in my early 20s. I agree with @joya_aspera: in that you are who you associate with.

My parents instilled that in me at an early age and I’ve always been a quality over quantity type person when it comes to my friends. I don’t need people in my life who don’t add something positive to my existence.

Post # 13
Member
2092 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@KC-2722:  +100. I don’t keep any friends in my life unless they significantly add to it in a positive way. Anybody who creates chaos or negativity in my life is not in my life for very long. It was amazing how many “friends” disappeared from my life after I quit drinking two years ago.

Post # 16
Member
2092 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@sheepandbear:  Ya nip it in the bud and don’t let her back in. We only live once and there is really no sense in keeping people around and allowing them to be close to us unless there is positive value in it for us.

Thanks for your congratulations! It will be exactly two years on Friday actually. My life has never been more amazing or my future more promising. Getting sober has been the hardest but single most rewarding thing I have ever done for myself.

Leave a comment


Sent weekly. You may unsubscribe at any time.

Find Amazing Vendors