(Closed) Do you have one of these where you work?

posted 5 years ago in Career
Post # 3
Member
3771 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Brookfield Zoo

LoL love the way you tell stories.  ENTER THE DRAGON!!  Umm no I really don’t work with any monsters!  Well, to be honest, I do and have, but I act so nice and sweet to everyone they can’t help but be slightly-nicer-than-they-are-to-everyone-else 😉

 

 

 

Post # 4
Member
2759 posts
Sugar bee

Muahahahahaha!

We have a crusty curmudgeon who spents 90% of his time writing/reading gay elf Lord of the Rings fanfic and the other 10% of his time muttering/cursing to himself, screaming at machines, sneering at the answers to daily trivia questions if they involve anything that happened in the last century and scolding people for using the microwave when he wants it.

Fortunately, I’m on the other side of the office from him so we rarely interact.

Post # 5
Member
9631 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@Nona99:   Bahahahahaha!!!!   Thank you for the laugh!

Um, yes, I’ve worked with her.  She used to hover over my desk, scowling, and yell very loudly at me.  Her breath smelled like a rotted corpse who smoked and had garlic salad for lunch. 

And another one at a different office, battleax from hell, bragged to me about feeding her neighbor’s annoying dog glass to get rid of it.  And another neighbor’s dog who got loose she put into her car and drove it miles out into the country so it could never find it’s way home.  She said, “It was so funny to hear them out there calling and calling that dog’s name.  That dog ain’t never gonna find it’s way home, haha.”  She was the epitome of EVIL.

Post # 6
Member
3553 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I’d have to have co-workers to have a monster, but I work alone for the most part. At my last lab we had a nosey neighbor who managed the lab down the hall. She loved to gossip and was in and out of our lab all of the time. My first introduction to this lady was when she cornered one of my co-workers in a stairwell to tell him how she was picking up her psychic from the airport later that day.

 

One day she threw a fit because we had about 7 bags of waste sitting on the floor waiting to be sterilized (we could only do 2 at a time, about 4 bags a day). She demanded that we cart it all up to the shared autoclave room which she gave us access to and sterilized all of our waste for us. Later my boss was like ‘why does she even care, it’s not her transgenic waste’. ehh don’t know why she made such a fuss, but it saved us from having to smell cooked moldy swamp for a week.

 

 

 

Post # 8
Member
3771 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Brookfield Zoo

@Sunfire:  hoooooly crapola there must be some kind of crime you can report that for…

Post # 9
Member
2213 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@Nona99:  LOL.  Love it.

Everywhere I’ve ever worked has had THE DARGON. (as the man likes to call those mystical, winged terrors)

Everywhere…except for my current job.

Which now leads me to wonder – am I the dragon?!

I don’t think so, though.  We’re all pretty chill here.  And I typically just do shit when it has to be done, and don’t make a big deal out of it.  That’s what the dolla bills are for!

@Sunfire: Whoa.  That’s so completely awful.  Poor puppy and her poor neighbors.  🙁  Epitome of evil seems accurate…

Post # 10
Member
9631 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@Nona99:   I know.  I hated that woman with a passion.  Know what happened to her?  This was all years ago, she was close to retirement age and I was around 21.  The company to which she’d been loyal for almost 30 years got bought out and liquidated all retirement accounts immediately.  She only got about 1/4 of what she should have gotten.  Ha!  So, what comes around goes around.  I used to plot ways of getting to her.  She was proud of the fact that she was so evil.  She made one of our co-workers cry on a daily basis, a really shy and sweet lady who was very timid.  *  shudder *  That was long ago.  I may have slipped a little something yucky into her coffee cup a time or two, don’t exactly recall.  Innocent

Wort!!  Yes.   I had a vision of him becoming your little one when I first saw that picture.  🙂

Post # 11
Member
8487 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2014

@Nona99:  Lmao. I’ve worked with monsters, but I cant write about it nearly as good as you. And honestly by this point, my stories about them all seem to just run into being the same story. XD

 

@Sunfire:  WOW. I would have been fired, because I’d have been the crap out of her. 

Post # 12
Member
9631 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@elysion:  It was twenty years ago, I hope she’s in H*LL where she belongs, lol, she was old then.  I had no way of doing anything about it because I didn’t even know where she lived or anything about her.  She was disgusting, I had nightmares about my puppy because of that b*tch.

Post # 13
Member
1607 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@Nona99:  I once had a Commander in the Army. We called her the dragon-lady. She was very good at being terrible to everyone she encountered. We might have been forwarding around one of her emails in which I actually said this. Then some idiot private replied all…and she was the original sender. Dufus.

Needless to say I was called in and got to rejoice in the satisfaction of her confusion. ‘What does Dragon-Lady mean?! Is this an insult?!’

‘Ma’am *aghast* – it’s a term of highest respect. We appreciate the way you handle situations without worrying about such non-sense like political ettiquete and social normalcy.’

She believed my sincere attempt and didn’t even catch the back-handedness of the statement.

AND 300 push-ups later that private figured out what a reply all button looks like and why he should never use it again.

Post # 15
Member
9631 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@Nona99:   Whoa, she sounds a little kinky with that decor theme.

What an awesome side effect that your puppy will piss her off.  Sweet!!

Post # 16
Member
9631 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@Nona99:  Wait, her name isn’t Gretchen is it?  I used to work with a hideous creature named Gretchen, whom we called Gretch the Wretch.  She decorated her office with lots of horsy-themed stuff, and was a barrel rider, whatever the heck that is. 

She put up a phony college diploma on her office wall and got busted for it, haha! 

She was so mean, she screeched at me all the time.  One time I put my hand up between us and told her, “When you can talk to me in a normal tone of voice like a professional I will listen to you.  But the moment you raise your voice at me and start screeching like this you turn invisible.  Poof – you’re gone.”  And I ignored like she was invisible for the rest of the day.

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