Post # 1
We are doing a seating chart and I’m designing the placecards myself. I have no idea what the answer to this is, so I’m hoping you ladies can help me out!
When you invite someone plus one, do you badger that person about who they are bringing, or do you write Guest on their placecard. Say your friends name is Samantha and she gets a plus one. Do you ask Sam her friends full name, or just simply write “Samantha’s Guest”? Is that rude?
Help! And thanks!!
Post # 3
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
You should get the name of the guest and invite him/her by name. Then you have the name for the escort card.
If someone doesn’t know the name and address of their date when you send the invitaitons (6-8 weeks out), then the relationship isnt serious enough that this stranger warrants an invitation.
Post # 4
Yes, you need to get the name of the guest.
Post # 5
@Bunny82: For me, personally, I’d like to ask what the Guest’s name is so that person will feel included. i know that made me feel pretty special when I went to a wedding (where I knew absolutely NO ONE), so I’d like to do the same for someone else. That said, we don’t have a lot of mystery guests to keep track of… maybe 3 people got a guest who we didn’t already know or at least knew the name. It might be a lot to keep track of if you have more mystery guests coming to your wedding.
Either way, I’m not really hung up on conventions and I’m not so into the etiquette snobbery either. I would go with what your heart feels is right and you’ll be fine. 🙂 Don’t stress!
Post # 6
definitely get the guests +1 name , if they won’t or can’t provide it by time you sneed to send in for cards to be printed, I would do only one card and put ‘ms Minnie Mouse and guest.’ I would that person an escort card (if you are doing them, I didn’t!)
Post # 7
We only have 3 mystery guests, I think. I am fairly certain I can print the rest of them, and then do a last minute print for the Plus Ones a week or two before the wedding.
@mrsSonthebeach: The people I invited who get the mystery plus ones don’t know anyone else at the wedding. I would rather them bring a friend that they enjoy spending time with than have them travel across the country to sit awkwardly by themselves for four hours. I’ve been to weddings where the only people I knew were the bride and the groom and they are painful.
Post # 8
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
@Bunny82: They can choose a friend 8 weeks in advance. That person will need the same courtesy of time to arrange their schedule for travel as any other guest.
Post # 9
If you know their name, yah I’d write them out. I’m going to aim to get all the guest names but if I don’t know one, I don’t mind putting “guest” on a couple cards. I do have a couple guy friends who most likely won’t know until last minute who they might bring.
Post # 10
You really need to get the name. I’d be pretty offended if I showed up and it just said “guest.” I know it may not be your fault, but I’d absolutely demand a name.
Post # 11
@Bunny82: If you can get the guest’s name, that is best. If you can’t get a name, I would write “Samantha LastName Guest.” I know people who have found a guest for a wedding the day before the wedding, so I can’t imagine what the bride & groom did there!
Post # 12
For serious couples, married couples, or engaged couples, or if someone put the name of their date on the RSVP, then I put it on the place cards. If they don’t qualify for any of those then they get an “& Guest”. I am doing escort cards, so the name of the invited person plus their guest will go on one card.
Post # 13
Make an attempt or two to get the name of their guest. I did have one person who’s last name I didn’t know (how hard is it to answer a text?! Do you not know your live-in “girlfriend’s” last name”?!), but everyone else was named.
Also then people realize they’ve comitted to being there BY NAME. 🙂 And it sucks to show up to a wedding with your long-term boyfriend and go pick up your placecard for “Asshole & Guest.” Thanks…. dick.
Post # 14
@Bunny82: Definitely get the name if at all possible. i went to a wedding recently of a college friend. Our invitation came addressed to my FI and I, but the seating chart said “my name and guest.” The bride knows my FI well, so I’m not sure why he was addressed this way (maybe her mom made the seating chart?) but it was a little offensive!
Going the extra mile to get the guest’s name will make them feel special and included.
Post # 15
The highest principle of good taste is “form follows function”. The purpose of a place-card is to show each guest where his or her place is. A place-card with “Guest” written on it does not show anyone anything that a blank place-setting does not show.
Of course, the proper thing to have done is to have asked those three lonely guests for the name and address of someone whom they wish you to invite, and then invite that person directly. Then you would already know the name of all your guests. But that boat has sailed. A nice personal note asking “whom will you be bringing to the wedding? I am so looking forward to meeting your friend,” is just that — nice, and personal. Unfortunately in this day and age when people do not reply to nore reciprocate invitations nor reciprocate invitations, you are not guaranteed of a response.
The last-minute solution, is to choose a guest-book attendant with impeccable social sense and good handwriting, and leave a guest-list, table chart, and stack of blank place-cards with her. It will be her job, when one of the mystery-guests arrive or when someone brings a last-minute change-out or when unexpected guests arrive, to hand-write the place cards and quickly and unobtrusively swap them into place . And you thought that “guest-book attendant” was a meaningless job.
Post # 16
- Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY
I would try your best to find out their name.