Post # 1
This is always an interesting topic. Do you know your FI/SO/DH’s passwords to his phone? Social media? Banking?
Some say that everything being completely out in the open and all the passwords known is best because it breeds honesty. Some argue that you shouldnt need any passwords if you really trust your guy?
Bees, what are your thoughts?
Post # 2
My FI is completely open about his passwords. Probably too open – I’m sure his family knows what they are too, which I’m not entirely comfortable with. I’m much more private about mine but have slowly told him some of them on a case by case basis as they came up. He still doesn’t know my banking and gmail password though.
Post # 3
FutureMrsHodgy: Yes and no. For years I didnt know any of it and it used to bother me. He’s a pretty private guy and did have some slightly shady behavior early on in our relationship. I threathened to pack my bags and he showed me whatever I wanted to see, shaped up and gained my trust back. The longer we’re together, the more we have to find shared passwords (wifi, safe, netflix, etc.) so I’m pretty sure I know all his passwords now, but I have never tried and dont really care to. He knows my phone password, but I dont know if he knows my other passwords… he doesnt really care to have access to my stuff.
Post # 4
No I don’t. His passwords are too complicated go memorize. His phone doesn’t have a password and all his accounts have the “remember my password” feature on so I could snoop if a wanted. But I have no reason to.
Post # 5
FutureMrsHodgy: My response is probably against the norm, because SO (now DH) is VERY ‘old school’ in so many ways, making any desire to snoop non-existant, etc 🙂
DH has an old flip phone, so no accessibility to social media/apps/email. DH has an email account, but is not exactly tech-saavy, so pretty early on, started using mine (that I check every day) for any online stuff. Until we were married, and joined bank accounts, he never had an online profile, or paid any bills online, etc. Now, since I manage everything, we do, and I check it daily. I only question a charge IF it is seems out of the ordinary?! And lastly, he has a FB profile. He maybe checks it weekly, maybe. We have two IPads in the house, and so I am signed into one, and he is signed into one – meaning full disclosure all the time, but definitely is full disclosure ever taken. Chances are, we are reading our newsfeeds right next to each other. I am not even sure he knows how to use Messanger on it, to be honest, and I pray he never wants to check mine, because I am in the works of throwing him a surprise party!!!
I do not think knowing PW’s is a sign of lack of trust, or a way to keep each other honest. Then again, I have a unique situation (I think), so it makes me really easy to say that?!
Post # 6
We know each others passwords because we’ve needed to login to each others things for various reasons.. Do I remember them? No..
He’s more likely to rememeber mine because he has a better memory, like knows his credit card number off by heart kind of memory. I don’t remember shit like that.
Post # 7
I have his phone password and he has mine. We use eachothers phones all the time. I am weird that I don’t have facebook. (longstory) But he does and I don’t know that password. I honestly trust him. So I never even think to get on it and check, or ask him to have his password. I really just don’t care. He just put me on his banking accounts, but I feel super guilty looking into them. So I never do. This may not be normal but, I feel like he is doing something wrong Ill eventually find out. No reason to stress myself out about something I can’t control. So yes I think its fine not to have passwords and not to be so nosey.
Post # 8
Yes, but mostly because it’s a word having to do with the site/service and then the same combination of numbers afterward — and he told me this, so I don’t feel weird knowing. I don’t ever log into his accounts without his express permission/request.
Post # 9
FutureMrsHodgy: His are too complicated, but I don’t need them. Sometimes he leaves his email open, I never look. I always leave my email and FB open and I assume he never looks. I had an untrusting relationship once and man was that a bad way to live. This is much, much better! So relaxed!
Post # 10
Yup…I know all his passwords. But I have a horrible short term memory…I’m constantly asking him to remind me, like if I need to log into his email to find something. I always remember his credit card pin though 😉
His personal phone doesn’t have a password, he always leaves his facebook logged in (as do I) his work phone I know the password to. I’ve never felt the need to snoop through his stuff though, so that’s probably why I forget his passwords.
Post # 11
FutureMrsHodgy: No I don’t but he doesn’t make them hard. He doesn’t keep them from me either. For example I can ask for his email password to look at “that thing his mom sent” or whatever and he’ll give it to me, I use it, and promptly forget it lol.
It’s the same with my passwords. He doesn’t know them, but if he asks he gets them. I wish he’d remember the password to my computer. He asks every. single. time.
Post # 12
My FIs phone isn’t password protected and neither is his computer. He uses the same password most everything so I know that one, but if he has a different password on something I don’t know it because I don’t check or ask.
Post # 13
Some of them. We are definitely open with one another, we leave FB and other stuff logged in on our laptops/ipad..I barely can remember mine so I would for sure forget his!
Honestly, it really depends in the relationship. I trust him very much. Plus, he is very open and never secretive about stuff. And he is brutally honest at all times.
Now, my ex-DH was awful. He was sneaky, flew a girl to our place when I was away overseas, hid pictures and convos of said girl, was overly flirtatious..I never trusted him so yeah, I had his passwords. I admit that I should have walked away sooner, because being in a relationship where there is zero trust it’s unhealthy and draining.
Post # 14
- Wedding: October 2014 - Brussels, Belgium
I know his email, social media, and select other ones. Email and social media I only know because he’s had be check things when he was away and didn’t have Internet access. I also know his Amazon info because he has Prime and I want to take advantage of the shipping and movies. As for banking, we have a joint account so I don’t need his info to access it. I’m not sure if he knows my passwords or not, he might, but I don’t really care.
Post # 15
Yes, I know most of them, just from acquiring things to do under his accounts over time. I never snoop on him.