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We have a dog who does much better at home then at someone else's house, so we welcome the opportunity for someone else to stay at our house while we are away. It's all about trust. Do you trust them? Then why not? I've heard of people not liking others sleep in your bed, so if that's the issue then I guess it isn't unreasonable just a personal preference. But, if it is in your house in general, then I don't really see what the big deal is.
I personally dont see anything wrong with it as long as you trust whoever is staying there. I'd wouldnt just let anybody those.. only family. And I'd leave a note on the counter "things to remember": LOCK DOOR WHEN YOU LEAVE!
Hmm, maybe thats the issue. I see how my SIL keeps maintains her place and I dont trust that she'll take care of my things. We live in different cities too, so I dont know her all that well- although I cant say Id be totally comfortable with my sister staying here either. Maybe Im just an uber private person?
My family is VERY nosey so I would worry about them poking around in my things. I am the 5th child of 7 and it wasn't until I was out on my own that I had my own room and didn't have to worry about sharing space/clothes/etc. with other people....as a result..I am territorial about my personal space...LOL.
They are welome to visit when I am at home though.
It depends on the person. My mom, sure. My sister? NO WAY. If your husband thinks it's okay, then you probably should go with it (it's his sister, right?). If you're afraid of them going through your things, etc. I'd do a thorough check through before and after they leave. ;-)
I get that you should trust the person but I think it has to be equal on all sides. It can't just be one side and not the other.
I don't think this has even been an issue with us as we have always been there from what I can remember, although they have been left alone during the day. I don't think DH would allow his brother there by himself but I could be wrong.
Depends on which family member--anyone in my family, sure! Almost everyone is my husbands family, yes...the only exception would be my FIL because I don't think he would really respect our space and our property and I don't trust that he wouldn't decide to fix something up and break it instead. We let him borrow my husband's car and it came back to us with a broken trailer hitch and a broken windshield. How does that happen?!
It depends on the person. All of our immediate family (parents and siblings) would be more than welcome to stay in our home no matter what the circumstances. But with extended family it would depend. Any of my cousins would be fine.. but some of hubs' cousins I probably wouldn't even want staying with me if I WAS home. Since it's your husband's sister and he trusts her I really think you should let them stay. I'll be honest with you if I was going to be visiting the city where my brother lived and their house was empty and available I would be REALLY annoyed if they made me go pay for a hotel.
I said only my family, because my dog is huge, and DH's family does not know who to handle him ...
It would make sense to have a family member stay in your house if they were housesitting or pet sitting, but just for the hell of it? Sorry, that's weird.
Oh- I didnt mention, they want to stay at our house in lieu of a hotel because my parents are having a reception for us this weekend. But, our house is in Canada, and the reception is in New York- its quite a drive + border traffic, so its not really ideal, just cheap. All family is welcome here when we're here.. maybe I just need to spend more time with them to gain more trust. But all of you are right, that if my hubs trusts her, I should trust his decision, but I dont know.. something still just isnt comfortable about the situation.
We have pets, so I welcome when my friends can stay over, and I wouldn't mind if my friend and family stayed at the house when I wasn't there. His family is a whole different story. I would be fine with his father, but not his mom and his sister. I don't trust them, and frankly don't feel like they are welcome in my home, and none the less to stay over when I am not there.
It would make me uncomfortable. Anyone can stay over if one of us is here, but if neither of us were home..I wouldn't go for it. I've actually had my cousins steal from my house and his friends break stuff so, it's sad to say I don't have alot of trust for people. I would let my mom, or a couple of his close friends we both trust, but thats about it.
I let just about anyone stay in my house. My dog is getting old and doesn't like to be bothered with going to anyone else's house. But I do hide certain things that I don't want people to see..just so it doesn't embarrass me later on in life!! If they see it after I hide it..thats their issue!
Has SIL has done anything to warrant you not to trust her? If not, then I say no biggie. Just make sure that change the sheets before you leave and after you come back.
I think it would be weird to have people in your house when you aren't there. Even if it was family, I would still feel weird about it. But, maybe you can limit them to certain areas of your home by locking doors if it makes you more comfortable. That way you are trusting your husband's judgement, but still have your guard up.
My bro and SIL had this problem. My SIL's mom stayed at their house for a night to take care of the dogs. They made up the spare bedroom for her to stay in and shut their bedroom door so she would know to stay out (they also told her not to go in their bedroom). When they got home, they found out not only did her mom go into their bedroom, but slept in their bed (they had not changed the sheets on their bed, just the guest room). My brother was totally weirded out knowing his MIL slept in his bed. He said if there is a next time, he's buying a lock for his bedroom door.
I would let anyone stay at our house if we knew them. Friends, family whoever!
There are only a few people I'd allow to spend the night in my house without us being there. It'd be my family, his and a few of our friends. I'm pretty trusting (which has bitten me in the ass but I am who I am!) about my space and having others in it. I trust that they respect us enough not to violate. We've never had our families there without us but I'd never hesistate to allow it. I've had my best friend there, which went just fine. I'd try to let my sister stay there while you're gone. Just set some ground rules, there's nothing wrong with that.
We have 2 cats and one is a kitten, so when we leave to go on our honeymoon, my brother will be staying in our place. I completely trust him and really have no worries about it.
Ok, so I had a conversation with Bakerella about this. And realized something really important- there needs to be transitive trust. So, if hubs trusts so-and-so, then I should trust his judgment to trust that person. I think Im able to do this- it may take a while for me to get over the level of discomfort- but all in all, I think it should work. Im just a really private person I suppose!!
I'm waaaay more laid back than most I think, but I kind of consider our house open to all. I'd let either of our families stay here if we weren't here, and I have already let (in fact, requested) a friend stay here for a week while we were on vacation to take care of the pets.
This reminds of a post by a bee about how her MIL came over to visit and straightened out their room when she (bee) was out of the house. Bee was ticked off. I personally don't care about stuff like that. I am 1 of 6. I shared a room with my sisters. Then I had roommates. I've lived alone for over 7 years but I am okay with folks staying at my place. I would even let a close friend who is not family stay at my place. I'm private but not that private. Eat, drink, be merry. Just don't dog-ear my books. I am very territorial about books :)
Well considering that my brother lives with us - my answer to this is YeS! But even if he didnt we would feel totally fine with friends or family staying there while we are out of town. We have a dog so we would rather someone stay at our house then have to take our dog somewhere. We just make sure to clean our house beforehand and put away anything that we wouldnt want someone else to see.
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My SIL and her boyfriend want to stay in our house this weekend, but we'll be out of town. My DH seems to think Im being rude by not allowing this, but its just something Im not comfortable with. Does anyone else allow overnight guests in their house when they arent there, or am I being unreasonable?