Post # 1
If I watch one more holiday commercial or special with the happy, perfect family at the most wonderful time of the year, I am going to scream. Anybody else feel this way?
I am finally happily married at the age of 57. My entire family including my two adult sons are in my hometown. We live an hour away in an in law apartment. I am enjoying getting ready for Christmas but I don’t know that we will be with any of my family. My one sister is in poor health and lives with my Dad. Her teenage kids live with my other sister as does my younger son. The “other” sister takes care of the family but everything and everybody has to do things her way or she writes them out of her life. I’ve been on her list for several years.
I sent her an email this week to try and make plans for the holiday. She vetoed getting together at my Dad’s. She said my sons should work it out and bring my niece and nephew with them. In other words she will not have us at her house or participate in any way. I’m just sad. Our apartment is very small and I don’t have space for six people much less gifts. Our weekend home is four hours away. My sons are upset. We have talked through various options including renting a hotel suite. The other option is McDonald’s! We haven’t come up with a plan. Meanwhile my sister has a 3000 foot house and we aren’t allowed to meet as a family. I know on Christmas Day, they all will end up there but we won’t be included.
So…….I’m not feeling the HO HO HO! We just want to spend a day, any day around Christmas with my kids, niece and nephew and visit my Dad. My sister almost died this year and our family is more fractured now than ever. Why can’t we all just get along?
Post # 3
Oh and my older son lives with my ex, his Dad. That’s certainly not an option.
Post # 4
I’ve never celebrated Christmas before, for religious reasons, so holidays are just bleh-normal for me. I love all the after-Christmas sales, though!
Post # 6
Really! Everyone loves the holidays?
Post # 8
I love the holidays espeicially the sales.
Post # 10
I hate the holidays, I feel your pain!
Could you meet up at a restaurant or diner? Many restaurants have side rooms and wouldn’t mind you staying for a bit. Or maybe you could do dinner and a show somewhere (dinner theatre)? Or go ice skating, visit any local attraction, etc.
Post # 11
I do not like the holidays. I do not decorate, I have never put a tree up in all my adult years (I’m 36). I hate buying presents for people I see once a year. I hate having to fly every year (we live far from any family so we must always return, because I sure as hell am not hosting!). I am certainly not flying to see my family, they didn’t even go to my wedding! We are flying to the ILs.
I am a big Scrooge.
Post # 12
As long as everyone is getting along I do. SO’s brother and sister were going at it all of last years Thanksgiving.
Post # 13
I love the holidays! It does get harder as you get older to try to make plans with everyone. My FI and I currently live about 4 1/2 hours away from our hometown. He works in retail so we will likely get to go home Christmas Eve night and come back Christmas night. It definitely sucks, but we are still trying to enjoy the holidays as best as we can. 🙂
Post # 14
I do love the holidays, but I get that family dynamics can complicate everything!
Post # 15
Glad I’m not the only one. I worked in health care and this is a very hard time of year for many people. Some people are truly alone and have no one. I always worried about those patients, especially the emotionally fragile ones.
I think we have come up with a plan for the weekend after. This will be the first year in my life I will not be with my kids on Christmas. We will just make the best of the time we do have together.
I think the bigger part of this is that my sister has truly written me out of her life and its sad.
Post # 16
I love love love the holidays! Although I know it can be hard organising family events.