Do you need mutual agreement to break up?

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Do you need mutual agreement to break up?
    No. : (141 votes)
    65 %
    Yes. : (4 votes)
    2 %
    I would prefer it, but don't need it. : (67 votes)
    31 %
    Psh! I prefer my break ups to be as messy and emotionally devastating as possible! : (5 votes)
    2 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2973 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    @MrsRevolutionize:  I broke up with FH once…and he rejected it. I really didn’t know what to say to him. I was like “uh…you…can’t….say no. I didn’t give you a choice.”

    But he wasn’t having it lol. Turns out, he was right & we worked through it…. but he put me through some serious childish sh:t and I wanted out. 

    Needless to say, I think once someone wants to break up other than asking for the why & what I did wrong…I wouldn’t say anything else. It’s a break up, not a divorce. 

    Post # 4
    Member
    10986 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2009

    @MrsRevolutionize:  You absolutely do not need the other person’s concurrence to end a dating relationship or to break an engagement. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    3866 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Take this with a grain of salt, since I’ve never had a relationship end (DH was my first boyfriend), but I feel like it would be easier if it’s mutual.

    However, it never NEEDS to be, imho. If one person decides the relationshp is over, it’s over. I think people can only be convinced to stay if they’re unsure about breaking up or if it’s over an issue that they truly think can be fixed.

    Post # 7
    Member
    4639 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    I think its easier if its mutual, but I know of very few breakups where this is actually the case. I’ve not dumped a lot of guys but in my experience, when I’ve reached the point (emotionally) of wanting you out of my life, you can’t change my mind.

    Post # 8
    Member
    1327 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    It would be nice, but someone can’t actually stop you from dumping them.  When you break up with somone and they “refuse” that basically just means that your ex is stalking you.

    Post # 9
    Member
    2565 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    If you are dating or engaged it does not need to be a mutual decision.  If one person wants to leave, the other can’t force them to stay because they don’t want to break up.  Who wants to stay with someone that doesn’t want to be with you anymore anyway?

    There are also some situations where I don’t think divorce should have to be mutual, as certain people will refuse to sign papers for whatever reason.  My great aunt had a partner and his wife left him and joined a convent.  But because she was catholic she wouldn’t divorce him so he was never able to marry my great aunt.  I think he should have been able to file for divorce without her signing and site “abandoment” or something.

    Post # 10
    Member
    1302 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I think it depends on where you are at in your relationship. A boyfriend? No, no mutual agreement needed. But ending it with your husband or even your fiance? I think it would be more mutual – like this is how I am feeling, I don’t think our relationship is going to work out, etc. and then at least giving the other person an opportunity to respond. I wouldn’t just end it with my husband if he wanted to try to make it work

    Post # 11
    Member
    863 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    @MrsRevolutionize:  What? Of course you don’t need the other person’s permission to break up. Ideally all break ups would be mutual and amicable, but obviously things don’t always hapen like that and if one person ends the relationship then it’s over. Nobody has the authority to force another person to stay with them – if that happens then the relationship is obviously very messed up and/or abusive. 

    Post # 12
    Member
    9219 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Nope, you can break up with someone without their permission.

    Post # 13
    Member
    6503 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @Brielle:  +1

    If I didn’t want to be on a relationship I would leave. I would wait for their mutual consent to the breakup.

    Post # 16
    Member
    1249 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    @MrsRevolutionize:  My FI and I were arguing one day, and he said something along the lines of “Maybe we should just break up”. To which I replied, “I don’t accept”. We both had a good laugh.

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