Do you regret eloping?

posted 4 years ago in Elopement
Post # 3
Member
6073 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

@mrsedwardslpn: 

You’re a month away! Is it possible?  Will you be out any money?  What has been the hardest with planning the wedding so far?

 

I will say that eloping is easier, less stressful.  You can focus on each other and not worry about anyone else’s needs.  I do not have any regrets with our elopement.

 

I have eloped twice now (in 2000 and in 2012).  The first one was REALLY uneventful.  As in we barely dressed up (nothing fancy), had no rings, and went to the county clerk’s office.  She stood up from her desk.  When she asked (in the middle of the ceremony) if there were rings to exchange, we said no.  Awkward!  We were so poor we could only afford to take two friends (the witnesses) to lunch.  We had another two friends who could have come, but really we were that poor. Then after lunch we went back to work.  It just came and went and nothing was special about it. 

 

So that method I really regretted.  I wanted to do it over for family, but there was just not enough money and a complete lack of interest from family.  I was going to do it 6 months later in the summertime, and they were all like, “Hmm well I don’t know what we’re doing then..” Duh!  You’re coming to my party and meeting my ILs!”   Sadly they did the same thing to me this time around.  So I am miffed at them again, but alas, I am the one that is different now, they have remained the same sadly.

 

This time around… I vowed to make this wedding special!  It did not require a lot of money.  We almost got married here in our town but up in the mountains, but we decided to make a big trip out of it (to Canada).  I have no regrets on how that went down.  It was perfection!  I’m sure it’s 100% due to the fact that I married someone who is a MUCH better fit for me in every sense.  As long as it reflects you both and it feels special, I don’t think there will be regrets.

 

PS – how kind that a bee gave you a dress!  Do you have it already?

 

Post # 5
Member
6073 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

@mrsedwardslpn:  Is your FI up for eloping?  Would you do it at the park with the flowers you have paid for (or downgrade to just a bouquet and boutonierre?)?

 

If this wedding is going to put you into any debt – that would be my first clue that eloping is a better decision.  No one should go into debt for a wedding in my opinion.

 

How many people are originally invited to the wedding and did you sent out invitations already?

 

What if they all saw you get married in the park and then you went to a restauarnt in town that had a private room for parties?  Just eat dinner there?

 

I worked and went to school full time and yes, it makes you a crazy person.  I wanted to wait until I was all done with school before we got engaged, becaus frankly it’s just too much – so I totally understand how stressed you are!

 

Post # 7
Member
6073 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

@mrsedwardslpn:  I think eloping sounds like perfect sense for your situation!  You both want it, it would make life easier.  Maybe in one year you can throw an anniversary party and have people over for a cookout, etc (something cheaper but celebratory).

 

 

 

I say have the park elopement, then take yourselves out to a fancy wedding dinner and maybe a night in a hotel.  Maybe even hire a photographer for the wedding and some photos afterwards.  That will most likely save you tons compared to a sit down 20 person restaurant dinner with a chef.  And less stress!!!

 

I do think you can make that free dress into a mermaid dress with a lovely sash by the way.  You’ll probably need to get a slip like this for it too:  http://www.davidsbridal.com/Product_Fit-and-Flare-Slip-550_Accessories-Lingerie-Slips

 

 

 

Post # 11
Member
6073 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

@mrsedwardslpn:  LOL!  Perhaps you can pretend for a whole day that you two are eloping in the park.  Just sit on it for 24 hours and think about how it feels.  If you’re sleeping better, you have a smile on your face, it feels right, etc. – then that’s the answer!

 

Post # 13
Member
46 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Nope!  Best decision ever.  Went away just the 2 of us and had a completely romantic and stress free time worrying about no one but ourselves!  Loved it.  We had a party about a month after we got back and it was a blast.  All the pressure of a wedding was off, so we just had fun!  Good luck!

Post # 15
Member
6073 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

@mrsedwardslpn:  What are you guys thinking today about the elopement idea?

Post # 16
Member
712 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

If you feel like you need to have your family with you, you may regret eloping. I regretted mine because my parents were so hurt. Also, my few guests were late for my wedding which ruined some plans. Elopement is cheaper but sometimes it isn’t worth the headache and pain it will cause.

Have you thought of postponing your wedding until you are finished school and moved into your new place? Maybe then it would be easier for you to plan a wedding.

A lunchtime reception should be far cheaper. If you cannot afford that, a cocktail reception is another option.

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