Do you say I love you to your in-laws?

posted 3 years ago in Family
  • poll: Do you say I love you to your in-laws?
    Yes, all the time since we started dating : (21 votes)
    10 %
    Yes, all the time since we got engaged : (14 votes)
    7 %
    Yes when I have to like when leaving their house or ending a phone conversation. Since engaged : (37 votes)
    18 %
    No but I hope that changes after the wedding : (8 votes)
    4 %
    No and I doubt it ever will change : (75 votes)
    37 %
    NO! I hate them! Hate them I tell you! The hill tops in hell will be covered in snow first : (12 votes)
    6 %
    No. I want to/wish I did but they haven't warmed to me : (3 votes)
    1 %
    No, they want it, but I don't : (8 votes)
    4 %
    They live so far that I never considered it. Hmm? : (11 votes)
    5 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    6812 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2014

    Same as you. Love my in laws too, but I don’t express it by saying “I love you.” And I’ve never really heard them say it, so there’s that.

    Post # 4
    Member
    1666 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2015

    @EncoreBridetoBe:  I do say that I love them and they say the same back. I said it a handful of times before we got engaged, but only within the past few years. Now that we’re engaged I say it more often. They’ve always been good at telling one another that they love each other – the boys even kiss their parents on the cheek before bed (seriously, its adorable) – so I think that just naturally translated to me when they got to know me. After 6 years I’m like one of the kids. Lol!

    Post # 5
    Member
    11772 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2013

    We do the “Love you! Drive safe! Bye!” thing when we’re leaving, But not like “Oh, MOM! I just LOVE you!”

     

    Post # 6
    Member
    3442 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    @EncoreBridetoBe:  My answer would be

    “Yes when I have to like when leaving their house or ending a phone conversation. Since we first started dating.

    But that wasn’t an option, so I voted “other”

     

    Post # 7
    Member
    1969 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    @EncoreBridetoBe:  My mom says it to my SO now and then, which I think is sweet but super wierd too.  She’s only seen him a handful of times over the years, but I know that she just loves him because I do, and he treats me right.  It still seems strange though everytime she says it.  

    @BrandNewBride:  Yeah we do the “Drive safe, love you, bye” thing with his mom too.  

    Post # 8
    Member
    560 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 2013

    They’re not an “I love you” family, but mine is. Like, my family says “Love you” on autopilot to end all phone conversations and everytime we’re leaving after a visit. His family never used to say it to us and he never says it on the phone with them (which I find super weird, but I guess that’s just not their dynamic). Lately though we’ve been getting the “love you guys!” as we’re leaving after a visit from them, and I think it’s a great sentiment. I’m pretty sure this will increase overall in his family once there are grandkids around (they don’t have any yet).

    Post # 9
    Member
    6503 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2013

    MIL says “I love you” at the end of conversations so I always say it back. I probably wouldn’t ever say it if she didn’t say it first.

    Post # 10
    Member
    42453 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    “Love you” at the end of a conversation or when leaving each other’s company.

    Started at no particular point.

    Saying it when we just started dating would seem a little phony to me. I didn’t even love him when we just started dating!

    Post # 11
    Member
    865 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2015

    Hell would freeze over first.

    I’ve never said it to my own parents – and they’ve never said it to me, so to people I’m not related to who I don’t even like? 

    There’s more chance of me going to Mars.

    Post # 12
    Member
    309 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    @EncoreBridetoBe:  this is a good thread.  I like my future in laws very much But I am not comfortable exchanging I love yous with them at all.  That was never said once in my house growing up by anyone or to anyone.  I tell my FI and my pup that I love them and that’s it.  My FMIL has said it a few times in text to me & I just respond with some xoxos or something, it’s a little awkward.  If/when she says it in person I have my FI with me to handle the response.

    Post # 13
    Hostess
    8680 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2014

    It’s more of an, “much love & hugs” kind of thing, we say it at the end of convos, be it on the phone, in person, texting or emails.

    Post # 14
    Member
    309 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    @Baal:  + 1.  Except I do like my FIL’s.  I’m still not about to say it to them when I don’t say it to my own mother!  

    Post # 15
    Member
    2125 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    No. I never even thought about this, honestly. I say I love you to my family, but not his.

    Post # 16
    Member
    8518 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2014

    I couldnt imagine telling them that, ever. I cant see them ever telling me that either.

    My FI has told my mom he loves her before though. Haha.

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