Do you sometimes feel you just don't understand your DH?

posted 3 years ago in Married Life
Post # 3
Member
2062 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@becca83:  I’m so sorry about the fire! Getting practical items during hard times might be a bit of a dissapointment. I’m sorry he didn’t like your gift!

Post # 4
Member
7410 posts
Busy Beekeeper

@becca83:  Sorry to hear about the house fire.

I am not a big fan of practical gifts for birthday/holiday presents. I think presents should be about spoiling the person and getting them something they desire but wouldn’t buy as an everyday item. So I can definately understand being disappointed. However I think he should have hid his disappointment a bit better.

Post # 5
Member
2299 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I’m ALL about receiving practical gifts, so I’m definitely with you on this one!! Sorry he was disappointed… that’s a bummer.

I did want to say that oh lawd, I don’t understand FI most of the time. He has man-brain… I just can’t figure out where his head is at. I love him anyways 😉

 

Post # 9
Member
1887 posts
Buzzing bee

@becca83:  Practical gifts can make some people feel let down, because they feel like they are things that they would get anyway.  You can’t get through winter without a coat in many places, so my guess is that he expected to buy one of his own choosing anyway, and in a style he liked and selected himself.  People who have gift giving as a love language often feel appreciated and spoiled when given something they would not otherwise be able to get for themselves.  He may have hoped for something romantic or sexy like you in lingerie or a fancy dinner, or something extravagant like the cologne.  Your heart was in the right place for sure, but a coat doesn’t really generate a feeling that is romantic, sexy, or extravagant.  It seems like a gift mom or grandma would purchase. Hang in there- I am sure he will love the cologne tomorrow and I am sure he loves you. You’ll feel better soon!

Post # 10
Member
884 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

When DH graduated college, he really wanted a new laptop. So his parents bought him a new laptop! YAY, right? Wrong. It’s not that he didn’t appreciate the gift and what not – but it wasn’t the EXACT laptop he wanted… and it definitely didn’t have all the specs he “needed”. Plus he felt his parents over paid and that he could have found a better laptop for the same price. 

Maybe your DH is experiencing something similar? Yes, he knows he needs a new winter coat and maybe he even had a specific one in mind but then you bought him a different one? Also, maybe he was expecting the cologne and since he doesn’t know that he’s getting that tomorrow, was disappointed that he got the coat instead.

Post # 11
Member
1373 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

Men are confusing sometimes.

Tomorrow, put the cologne in the jacket pocket and make him try it on again 😉 it’ll dissolve all the frustration, he can enjoy both and you can silently chuckle at how silly boys can be!

@becca83:  

Post # 12
Member
2330 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Men!!!

I am someone who loves receiving practical gifts – means I don’t have to buy them myself! – and, to me, an expensive coat is NOT a practicial gift but a bog standard cheap one would be. 

Its a pity he didn’t like your gift and if he wants you to return it still then maybe you should – but, if it were me, I would tell DH that this means he is not allowed to moan or whine or complain about not having a winter coat. After all, he did have one…he just didn’t want it!

Post # 14
Member
2330 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@becca83:  ha ha! I knew he would. Boys are all the same…you offer them something and they don’t want it but as soon as you take it away…I want it, I want it!

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