Post # 1
The present buying season is here and with that comes the massive amount of spending I’m trying to avoid. We are not doing well financially so I really limited our spending to our parents. I have worked all year to find little gifts and thought I was all set until now my husband wants us to buy for 5 more people, including 2 teenagers from his side of the family that we don’t see. I would love to buy everyone presents but since we have no holiday plans to see them, I feel like it won’t be as big of a deal if we don’t give them presents and we have never exchanged presents in the past. Hubby is now mad because we picked up gifts for my parents and grandma as well and not his entire family as well. I only ended up picking up a few extra things since my parents told us they are giving us money for a new bedroom set, that’s almost $1,000. I know its not about the money but I feel like my parents are always providing us with stuff and I wish I was able to repay them. We got his parents gifts and we are only missing out on his brother’s family but we can’t afford anything extra. What do I do?
Post # 3
I am the same way! My mom to do this day will do whatever for me and I love her dearly but she does not take no. She’s very sneaky. So I want to really splurge on her this year. FI does not care, because I am spending it.
This year he buys for his family, and I buy for mine and its from both of us.
Post # 4
We spend more on my nephew and niece at Christmas because DH’s nephew and niece have an extra gift day in the year. They have a gift on their birthday and name day, and something small at Christmas, whereas mine get birthday and a large gift to share at Christmas. As for parents, we spend the same-ish.
Post # 5
Hmm… good question! I spend around $150 on each one of my siblings (I have 3), around $75 on their SO’s (only one this year), around $300 on my parents. We spend around $150/each on his neice and nephew, about $100 on his sister and her husband and $200 on his parents.
So I guess it’s kind of close.
Post # 6
Remember fair is not always even.
No. We buy for more people in my family in the number of people and I try to buy the same value each year for each level. IE parents vs siblings vs cousins.
I shop year round for sales and sometimes someone gets only $30-40 spent on them and another year it may be $90. However to the person opening it it will appear to be worth about the same. Over the years it will even out.
Some years we give a bigger gift to his mom or my mom because of the item they want/or needs is more expensive.
Post # 7
No. We do for each person what we did for them before we met. For me that means gifts for my parents, brother, sister in law, and grandma. For my husband that means he dad/step mom, mom/step dad, sister and boyfriend, and this year a new nephew!
So we have more people to buy for on his side, but he does NOT buy for his grandparents and I do buy for mine. Also, I always tended to spend more on my parents than he spends on his. We just go by the rule of letting the person whose family it is set the “who and how much” guideline.