Do you tell his family you love them?

posted 2 years ago in Family
  • poll:
  • Post # 3
    3344 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2013 - Rhode Island

    We’re the same way.  Been together for 7 years and as soon as we got married, his family started saying “I love you” to me.  I think marriage just makes things different for people.  My mom was a little different; she had told my husband that she loved him like a son when we were only engaged.

    I think you should only say it if you mean it.  I tell my stepmother that I love her because I do.  I tell his family I love them because I do.  That has more to do with it for me than legally marrying my husband.

    Post # 4
    2428 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    My husband’s family and I said “I love you” to each other long before we got married. I even lived with his mom for a brief time in school due to roommate drama. We were together for 7 years when he proposed and 9 years when we got married.

    As for your mom’s husband, don’t feel pressured to say it if you don’t mean it. Does he say it to you? And that’s why you feel guilty? They should understand that you don’t feel ready.

    Post # 5
    1209 posts
    Bumble bee

    My mom has told SO she loves him, well its more like: “love you guys” on the way out the door… I’ve never even heard SO’s family say I love you to anyone other than to his young niece and nephew.

    Not sure if it would change when we get married…

    Post # 6
    112 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

    I’ve been with my fiance 2 years. I tell his mom, dad, step-mom, and grandma that I love them, and visaversa. I truly do. They are awesome people! We are pretty close to his family, and not so much mine, but it needs to be that way, and works great for us! 

    Post # 7
    1035 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I love my own parents dearly but don’t tell them that often. It would feel strange to say it to my in in laws. Maybe it’s a British thing!

    Post # 8
    4147 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    DH and I have been together 7.5 years and married for 2.5 of those.  I’ve never been able to say it to either of my ILs.  They have both told me they love me, but it makes me uncomfortable and I don’t say anything back lol.  I’m very close with my MIL, but not enough to tell her I love her.

    My mom hasn’t told my DH that she loves him directly, she usually says something like “love ya guys” when we’re leaving. 

    Post # 9
    293 posts
    Helper bee

    His family started saying it to me after we got engaged I believe, but it may have even been after we were dating for a couple years. I dont think anyone in my family has said it to him though, even though we are married.

    Post # 10
    207 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

    My FFIL says “love you guys” whenever we leave, and has since six months into the relationship.  I always felt like he just didn’t want to exclude me.  My mom has considered my FI part of the family for awhile, dotes on him, and says she loves him to me, but I don’t think she’s every actually said it to him.

    Post # 11
    1721 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2014


    souza_2005:  I’m very close with my MIL and she tells me she loves me before we hang up the phone or when leave…we are also close with DH’s aunt and uncle (they’re like his 2nd parents) so they tell me they love me too.  DH is not as close with my family as I am with his…so my parents don’t say they love him or anything like that….but it could also be bc i’m a girl and he’s a guy. Who know lol

    Post # 12
    559 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2014

    I say it if they say it first,so it’s not awkward. Maybe that’s weird. My family growing up,we always said love you after every phone call and when leaving the house,etc. so it’s not that. I don’t know lol

    Post # 13
    32 posts

    My FMIL started telling me about a year after FI and I started dating.  Of course, I returned the same. they really are awesome people 🙂

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