Post # 1
Just curious to have responses. I’m youngest, Darling Husband is oldest. I’ve never considered birth order to affect our relationship, but I recently realized that we seem to have less contention over certain issues my sister and brother-in-law (both oldest children) seem to have – they’re very much in love, but both have a very strong need to be “right.”
So vote on the poll, then comment on whether you think your birth order affects your relationship!
Post # 3
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
My pastor talked with us about this at our premarital counseling. My husband is the oldest, and I’m in the middle, but since my older brother is 5 years older than me, I could as an oldest child too, apparently. I think it’s good to understand your spouses childhood experience, which birth order is a part of, so that you can understand expectations, how he/she responds to pressure, etc.
I definitely have a strong need to be right, but if I never pretend to know something I don’t.
Post # 4
I’ve never even considered this. I wouldn’t think it would effect the relationship, but I have no idea. My Fiance is the oldest of two, and I’m an only.
I think his parent’s favoritism might have effected him. They DEFINTELY favor his sister more. They give her everything and value/trust her choices, where they criicize/question everything he does.
Post # 5
@MrsEdamame: oh yes, my bf and i are both oldest children and both want to be right. I think he’s a little more intense about it than I am, but it definitely contributes to many arguments. I think the birth order also contributes in positive ways, in terms of both of us being ambitious and goal-oriented. Of course, at the moment, my goal seems to be getting that ring, which he’s rebelling against….lol
Post # 6
@Mrs. Bear Cheese Pie: I wonder if that has something to do with being the oldest and being male. Darling Husband gets a lot of that from both his mother and extended family (he’s the 2nd oldest grandchild on his mom’s side). He’s the oldest of 5.
Post # 7
I was just thinking about this the other day! I’m the oldest, SO is a middle child. He’s much more of a compromiser, while I like to make decisions. I’m also more high strung and he’s more laid back. I’m working hard on not steamrolling him.
Post # 8
Absolutely. We’re both the oldest and our personalities are very similar because of it. Ironically, our siblings fall into their respective child-order-stereotypes as well.
Post # 9
I think it does. Fiance is an oldest, I am a middle. He is more set in his ways, while I’m more compromising.
Post # 10
@Pearberry: This exactly lol
Post # 11
I’m the oldest of my four brothers and Fiance is the only child. I don’t think this affects us.
Post # 12
@Steampunk Angel: It’s a battle, but he’s worth it.
Post # 13
We are both the oldest and both come from divorced families…so we both took on that role of “mini-mom” or “mini-dad” when our parents were going through it taking care of our younger siblings.
We also both have a problem being wrong, aren’t amazing at compromise, and often attempt to aid our siblings even when we need to butt out. The great thing is that, for example, if Darling Husband is trying to “over help” his brother I can objectively say, “Hey, he’s a big boy, let him do it.” So we can play the voice of reason and we know the other understands us.
Post # 14
My option’s not up there. I’m an only, he’s the younger brother to an older sister.
He LOVES to call me ‘spoiled’… like, loves. It drives me crazy. We also have some big differences in the way we grew up and in our current family situations. It’s caused some misunderstandings but we get through it.
Post # 15
I dont think so because I don’t really buy into the birth order thing. I think there are so many things that can happen in life that changes who you are as a person that birth order is a moot point.
Post # 16
I’m the youngest, Fiance is the oldest …. kinda a weird observation. He is my brothers age(28..almost29) and I am his sisters age(24). My brother and his wife are both the oldest siblings.