Weddingbee boards

I have worked in both retail and the restaurant biz, so I know how tough it can be having to put on a happy face all the time and dealing with people's BS. My SO and I went out for dinner at Olive Garden the other night. I know it's not a ritzy restaurant, but I feel like you should always expect to be treated at least relatively well no matter how much you're spending. 

Our waitress had a bad attitude from the start. She was rude, took our orders down wrong so we had to send them back, and we had to ask her repeatedly for refills. She was only waiting on one other table and we noticed she treated them poorly, too, so it's not like she was stressed and having a hard time.

What aggravated me is that at the end of our meal, my SO tipped her as if she had given us pretty good service. He said it's just the right thing to do, but I totally disagree. I worked my ass off when I was a server to earn good tips; I didn't just see it as my right to receive a tip if I had a bad attitude or did a poor job.

Do you tip regardless of the type of service you receive? 

What's the point in busting your butt and giving good service if you're going to receive the same tip regardless?

My standard when eating out is always 20%. Occasionally we will leave more if the server is really awesome. But if service sucks, we just leave a smaller amount. Maybe 15%, or maybe 10% if it was really bad.

Only one time have I ever not left a tip.

@beekiss: Same for me.  I generally do tip less if we get poor service.  Although, I have to say, that doesn't happen too often for us.  Maybe we just don't go out enough, but I think we usually have good service.

I don't...otherwise, what's the point? If you tip the same regardless, then it doesn't leave any differentiation between crappy service and excellent service. If I have really really good service, I'll usually leave between 20-25%. Regular good service is between 15-20%, bad service is usually about 10-12%. I've only ever left no tip once, when my group of friends and I were literally ignored by the waiter for like 20 minutes, not given silverware, food came out at different times and was cold, etc. 

Just to clarify here: I'm referring to the SERVER's attitude and service, not the food. I agree it's not the server's fault if the food is crappy. 

I'm with the majority here...I tip, but not as much as if the service was good.

I'll have to ask my mom about this one, too. About a month ago, she went to her favorite resturant where she and my father frequent, and they had a new server. This young woman had a horrible attitude, and when my mother finally asked for her to fix the order (it came out really mixed up, mom tried to deal with it and then decided to just ask nicely for it to be fixed - my mom is not ever mean), the server got really mad. When my mom asked for a coffee refill as well, the server brought the coffee back and when my mom drank to the bottom, the woman had lined the bottom of the cup with goldfish crackers out of spite!! It was so strange! I'll have to ask if they left a tip that night...

I tip around 22% for good-great service. Anything that the server does to hinder my dining experience brings the tip down to a 17% tip. Still pretty good, but I can't justify tipping a lot when I didn't fully enjoy myself.

@soyjoy222: OMG I would hope not. That server owed your parents- lol!

For me, it's all about attitude. If someone doesn't refill my drink for a while but I can see he/she has been assigned too many tables to wait on, I still tip well because I can see the server is hustling and doing his/her best. We're all human and can only do so much! 

The same goes if the person is new: I've had plenty of new servers mess things up, but if he/she is really trying, I totally respect that.

I have not left a tip twice in my life. One time was at a Waffle House in the middle of nowhere where the server was a racist b**** who treated us poorly all night and actually asked my boyfriend if he was going to pay for his "homeboys" (a couple of black friends who were with us) or if they "brought some drug money" while using air quotations. 

The other time was when the server literally ignored us and flirted with the bartender all night. She would go in and out of the kitchen tickling the male servers and flirting like crazy and didn't check on us once. 

I normally cut a chunk out if the person is rude. I understand that my SO wanted to give her SOMETHING, but in my opinion, the tip he gave her was much too generous for the awful service she chose to give.

@missmidcentury: Eh, I get what you are saying but I don't really agree.

The one time we didnt leave a tip was a couple of years ago. My FI and I were out with another couple and it was a new restaurant/lounge thing. We ordered drinks and the waitress got all of them wrong. Ok, no big deal....it happens. Then we ordered our meals. About 45 minutes later 3 of them came out. My FI's meal wasnt brought to the table and the waitress left. We figured she went to grab it from the kitchen but we didnt see her for like 10 minutes. So we went to find her and she says "Oh, we didnt have any duck. Would you like to order something else?". Ummm, what? You couldnt have told us an hour ago when we placed our order!! The night ended with a different waitress walking by and she dropped a tray full of drinks on my FI as he walked past her at the same time.

We did complain to the manager, but we also didnt leave a tip for this lady. A tip is to reward you for doing a job. This lady didnt do that, sorry.

@Bostongrl25: Totally agreed.

I also understand your logic, missmidcentury, but respectfully disagree to a point. I think it should be brought up with the manager and a tip should also not be left. You are right that it doesn't do a whole lot without talking to the manager, though.

I worked at a tip based job for 20 years.

I am UBER harsh and will ask them what their tip out is and leave them that. No need for their support staff to suffer.

But I will tell them why.  And only do this if it is 100% server error.

But I repeat, I make sure to tell them why. No need to have them go bitch about it in the kitchen to their co workers just thinking Im a cheapass.

I once went in to a place I used to work and got such bad service I complained to the owner and got a girl fired too.

I know waitressing/bartending is hard. Its one of the most demanding jobs I've ever had, but I still refuse to tip if you don't deserve it.

Oh and in Canada your wage is still pretty decent, so you'll get by.