Weddingbee boards

@hanzabelle: I'm doing most of the planning for sure, but I told my FI at the very beginning, that whenever I asked his opinion on something, he was not allowed to say "Whatever you want" or "Whatever makes you happy."  I played it as a joke, but it worked.

I am going to share with you the alternative in hope it will help:  a fiance involved in every decision.

I get really frustrated because I know certain ideas will work out, but my fiance sometimes can't see the bigger picture of how things work in our theme or vision.  he  has an opinion on EVERYTHING.  This can get extremely stressful when I am trying to navigate vendors and put everything together, and I look back remembering conversations with my sister that I wish he would check out from this a little so I can actually make decisions.

I know this sounds terrible, but I almost wish I had your situation.

@hanzabelle: I think he just wants to make you happy when he says "whatever you want". I felt very alone at the start of this process and that was always Danny's answer, too. Then finally I kinda flipped out and was like "I NEED HELP! JUST GIVE ME A DAMN OPINION ONCE IN AWHILE!!!" and he's been helping me as much as he can ever since. (he works a lot.) it sucks because he works all the time, my family and half my bridal party is hours away in NY, and the other half of my party is hours away in VB! So I have to go places alone, try on dresses alone, UGH! It's sad, really. 

I would just talk to him and tell him how you feel and that you're feeling overwhelmed. 

And remember, you're not alone! You always have us bees! ^_~ 

I am definitely with you on this. I just wrote a post about it as well! Try having a talk with him about it and let him know how important it is to you. Also, keep using this site! Another bee reminded me that that is what the site is all about!!

My FI told me that he is just excited to marry me, and he will be happy with any decision I make.  But then, I set up an appointment that he can't make it to and he acts hurt.  I think that he says that he doesn't want an opinion just to make sure that I get everything that I want, but it's so adorable to see him get excited about something. Example: Yesterday we went and saw our favorite reception and ceremony venues.  He spent hours making 3D maps of the areas and messing with table placement.

I broke down at the Justice of Peace's house over this issue. FI is only off one day a week so when we actually have to go out and take care of things, I hold off the whole week so we can do it together, Then we go out to do things and he's basically a deer in headlights.

We went to talk to JoP about venues and he basically waved his hand, nodded, and said "whatever she wants." And I had no clue whatsoever. JoP left for a second to get something for us and I began crying and stammered something like "I have no clue what I'm doing, we're supposed to be in on this together and you don't have an opinion about ANYTHING!!" That poor JoP, I think I made things awkward for her. I have a feeling she heard me and stayed out of the room longer than necessary to let me collect myself in private.

i found out later he was keeping quiet because he was afraid I wouldn't like his ideas and he didn't want to make me unhappy.  But now he contributes equally so it's better.