(Closed) Does Anyone Wants to Come?

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1963 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

It looks like you’re about 11 months out.  Would it be possible to push back the day even a week or two?  It seems like a big deal for your immediate family to be there.

The guilt trip about the travel is inexcusable.  However, if your sister and best friend would have difficulty, then I might push back the day a little.  That’s awesome about your grand-pa!  Sometimes I think the older generation can relate more to us than our parents.

Sending well wishes your way!

Post # 4
Member
1013 posts
Bumble bee

I would have to say, think about changing the date if you can.  Unfortunately you picked the week of exams which is a big issue.  If you could push it back a week that would resolve everything. 

Post # 7
Member
1013 posts
Bumble bee

@kmsw:  It is definitley doable.  THe only issue will be that they will be focused on studying non stop and not be able to help with planning as much etc. 

But i think if she mentions it to the professor right away when the semester starts they should be able to accomodate her

Post # 9
Member
339 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Really??? Your family is seroiusly saying that a plane ticket is too much??  I checked kayak.com and around those dates it would be roughly $660 —flying into lansing, (which is always a more expensive airport) and $505 into detroit.  Your parents should be willing to pay that kind of money to see their daughter get married, even if finances are tight!  Are you able to help chip in for the flights? 

And as far as exams, its not like you told them a week before.  People always wait til the last minute to study anyways, so what does studying a day early matter?  I would have to say a wedding trumps exams on a Friday.  Its not like they are the board exams or anything (I am assuming).

Sorry this is frustrating for you!  :/

Post # 10
Member
5786 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2011

I would change the date. I had a hard time settling on a date because I had to contend with multiple college and high school graduations but I’d rather accomodate people than ask them to take exams early. Maybe the Friday before the reception your MIL has planned? I’m assuming its in Michigan as well.

Aren’t flights cheaper two weeks before Christmat because everyone waits to travel until like the 20th?

Post # 12
Member
3569 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

It seems like they are trying their best to come. If you sister is in college a wedding isn’t going to be a good reason to miss a final exam. Have you asked her about the policy at her school? I know for me the only reason there would be for missing a final exam would be death or a medical issue. Some professors probably could make an exception but it may not be possible.

I seen some crazy stories on the bee of family members being rude and inconsiderate and that doesn’t seem like the case for your family as they have valid reasons.

Post # 13
Member
2105 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

You might have to decide what’s more important: the date or the people attending.  Before we settled on a date, we asked the most important people around us what worked best for them (we gave them a few options).  That way it lessened the chance of the people we most want there not being able to attend.  If your date is super important to you, though, then you may have to understand that it doesn’t work for everyone.  

Post # 14
Member
2105 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I should add that when I was 18 I had to skip a few days at college to attend my sister’s wedding (it was near the beginning of the semester) and I got dropped from 2 of my classes because of it.  I wasn’t mad at my sister for it, but I was super upset that I had to take those classes later!  They were required for graduation.

Post # 15
Member
12827 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I understand that it’s upsetting, but skipping exams is really hard.  In my university, if you skip the exam, you fail the course. no getting around it.  Is there any way to move the date?

Post # 16
Member
1663 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I don’t think taking exams a little early would be that big a deal, if your sister tells her professors at the beginning of the semester.  This seems different than @MadameTussaud’s experience since it’s the end, not the beginning– I know lots of schools have different rules about missing class at the very beginning.

 

It also sounds like part of the frustration is that your parents are that excited (ie, of course we’ll be there, no matter what!).  That is hard too– I am dealing with the lack of excitement as well.  And while of course we, as the ones getting married, are the most excited– it’s nice to have those we care about seem excited as well.

 

Hopefully they’ll be able to figure these issues out!

 

 

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