Post # 1
I recently got an email from one of my bridesmaid’s mothers, asking that she and her husband be invited to my wedding. I have known her daughter since high school, but have not seen her parents for quite a while. This bridesmaid has been over to my house many times over the years, and knows my family. I was in this bridesmaids’ wedding last year, and felt a bit slighted when she did not invite my mom to her wedding. Now her mom wants to be invited to my wedding, and although we are planning a do-it-yourself kind of wedding, we still need to keep our guest list under control.
Do I invite her now that she has asked? It’s not like she is a stranger, but she did not come to mind when I was making the guest list, particularly because my mom was left off of her daughter’s guest list. Obviously she knows how much extra guests cost. But I feel like maybe I should just be the bigger person and invite them. What would you do? My bridesmaid, by the way, has not mentioned this to me, so I don’t know if she is aware of her mom’s request.
Post # 3
Nope. I am so beyond tired of people inviting themselves.
Since when is it okay to ask for an invite to anything???
Post # 4
No, if you invited anyone that asked and non-jokingly/jokingly said that they better be invited you would go way over and not be happy with your guest list.
Just say that due to budget your guest list is restricted/ reception constraints/ intimate wedding. Whatever applies, or you don’t have to explain yourself if you do not feel it is necessary.
Post # 5
I say no, simply because she’s not a “must have” guest since you are doing a DIY wedding…if we invited ever person who asked us if they could come we would have well over 250 guests and we are having a DIY wedding aswell. Personally I think asking for an invite is really rude but that’s just me. It’s totally up to you but I know myself that I would say no.
Hope that helps! 🙂
Post # 7
I know this situation oh too well. FI and I are having 75 guests. That means I can only invite 1/2 of those ppl bc FI has to have room to invite the other 1/2. Needless to say, I have to turn alot of people down when they “invite themselves”.
Post # 8
Nope, I really can’t believe she even asked. How rude. That is the worst when people invite themselves.
Post # 9
No. You definitely don’t need to send an invite.
I would probably end up inviting her though.
Post # 10
Thanks! I know I probably won’t invite her, but this leaves me with another question for you all…should I talk to my bridesmaid about this? I’m guessing she might eventually wonder if I am inviting her mom. I seriously can’t believe how forward she was in asking either! And get this (it made me laugh) she suggested I sit her with the parents of another bridesmaid (who are like my second parents) since her husband knows the other husband. haHA! I hate to be one of those “they didn’t invite me, so I’m not inviting them” kind of brides, but it just adds to the reason why she should not make it onto the guestlist right??
Post # 11
I would just not say anything and just not invite them. If your bridesmaid or the mother bring it up again, just say that the guestlist is already set with close friends and family.
Post # 12
Its a very funny situation but I have to agree with the majority and say I wouldnt invite her either… in my opinion its rather annoying how people hear the word wedding and automatically assume they should be invited and then there are those that have the nerve to ask to be invited. I feel like if you have to ask to be invited then obviously you shouldnt be invited… I could just be a meanie LOL
Post # 13
No. Very simple. A PC reply would be, “our guest list is small and limited. I am so happy your daughter will be at my side representing your family well.” So ppl just like to have somewhere to go, something to do to serve as an outing or a date. Tell her to take her hubby on a date and have a toast in your honor!
Post # 14
You didn’t leave her off out of spite, so don’t even feel bad for this. Rude people (or even nice people who ‘slip up’ every once in a while) do not deserve something just because they ask/invite themselves. The standard ‘sorry…budget/space/small guest list/etc’ answer should suffice, and like another PP said, just say how thrilled you are to have her daughter in the service. Do not feel obligated to invite her (or seat her next to her requested friends, lol…wth?).
Post # 15
nope, you’re definitely not obligated!
Post # 16
I wouldn’t invite her. I hate being ambushed by these people who invite themselves. I’v been telling people my guest list is maxed out and sorry for your luck. I didn’t invite a lot of family because they have not invited me to anything so I don’t feel bad at all.