My bf”s son is getting married in about 6 weeks & his son asked him if he would mind being introduced at his bridal reception with his mother ( my bf’s ex-wife). I feel like first of all if you have to ask, then you should already know the answer to begin with. With that being said; although my future step son ( my bf’s son & soon to be groom) asked his dad’s permission, his dad ( my bf) really feels uncomfortable with this too although he does not even want to tell his son that ( honestly neither of us are even looking forward to this day for many reasons, especially things of these matters) & with being announced in with his ex-wife. ( Um, hello!!!! There is reasons they divorced & chose not to share all the details with their kids, isn’t that enough? ) I have been a part of my soon to be future step son’s life (my bf’s son) since he was in grade school & his mother (my bf’s ex-wife) has made the whole family miserable for over a decade, and I mean miserable too.. Do you think anyone has forgotten that? We certainly have not! Even though through the whole wedding planning stages & bridal shower process & wedding details they’ve seemed to have forgotten all that! Quite actually, I’ve been in my bf’s son’s life longer than his soon to be’s wife, (& I mean A LOT LONGER too) & probably in reality more than his real mother even has. The Groom’s mother made the whole family’s life miserable for a VERY LONG TIME! I know the day is about the bride & groom only; but why would either of them want their parents uncomfortable that day? (especially since they’ve put up money for things too, not just the Bride’s family?) I think it’s very selfish of the bride & groom honestly. Absolutely I agree that the focus should be on the bride & groom on their day, but the parents should NOT BE announced, have glasses or agenda’s, mass printed materials, programs, shirts, favors or anything of such matter with mother or father of the bride/ groom or etc. through the wedding or the bridal shower process at all wirhout their current divorced parent’s partner’s name there too. Either do it right or don’t do it at all because it’s in very poor taste, & I’m sure if the bride & groom are not pressured by such ridiculous behaviors or feelings inside that day from others, than their wedding day will be much more rewarding as well! You should not zero out any parent, step parent or parent’s boyfriend’s or girlfriend’s or anyone you’ve loved as family, regardless whether or not they are family or not, in any way PERIOD, especially if they’ve been a part of your life most of your life & if you don’t really like them, than just don’t invite them then. Trust me, it will be easier on everyone, but don’t be surprised if one of your real parents don’t show up because of the way you’ve handled things. Why does it even matter if they are announced in together? It’s not in poor taste to announce in Mother of the groom escorted by groom’s Uncle Bob Miller so & so, or Father of the groom escorted with partner Jill Smith, etc. Are you announcing grandparents too? Where do you draw the line? (Besides the fact that your only taking precious time away from your overly priced reception that day.)
If your going to do it, just do it with a little bit of class or only announce the Bride & Groom! I promise people won’t go home from your wedding day saying ” they forgot to announce the bride or groom’s real parents into their reception!” Seriously, BE FOR REAL!
Being my bf’s gf and darn near step mother to the soon to be groom ( & several other of his children too for quite some time) it certainly has been a very thankless job & this only proves it more & more!
You don’t feel bad not inviting children to your wedding reception correct, so why do you have to announce two people in together that can not even stand looking at each other & are divorced because they no longer wish to even be around each other? Think about it…
I only wish the bride & groom the best slways, but if things never did work out in their future, would they like those same pressures especially if they went through “War of the Roses in their bloody divorce?”