(Closed) Does it get easier? How long did it take you?

posted 6 years ago in Parenting
Post # 3
Member
9630 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

My advice is never leave your child crying alone for 20 minutes, that is excessive.  When my son was young I always went to my pediatrician for advice about such things and he was great. 

To answer your question – I weaned my son as soon as he learned to walk.  However, I’d taught him to put himself to sleep a lot younger than that, probably around 6 months old or so.  I only ever let him cry for 1 or 2 minutes at a time.  Then I would go in and pat his little back and comfort him to let him know I was still there, but NOT pick him up.  Then I would stand outside the door another 2 minutes and repeat until he fell asleep.  It took him 4 days to learn this.

Also:  Weaning should be done gradually, you don’t go cold turkey with a baby.

 

Post # 4
Member
6010 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

Ah, hugs.  🙁  I hate hearing my kids cry, too.   I assume you’ve been nursing her to sleep?  And now you’re trying to teach her to go to sleep on her own?

Only you know your child, so only you know which approach would work best, but a good friend of mine weaned her daughter from nursing at around 18 months using a different method.  She started by nursing her daughter just until sleepy, and then rubbing her back until she fell asleep.  Then she slowly cut down the amount of time she nursed by a few minutes every day, so that, by the end of the week, she was just “kissing the boobies goodnight”.  If this method of weaning is really hard for you, you might have more success with a longer-term approach?

I don’t have a lot of experience, otherwise, I hope this goes quickly for you.  I know it sucks, but teaching her to fall asleep on her own is a really important step!

Post # 6
Member
11234 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

You could just let her wean naturally?

Post # 7
Member
6010 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

@Sunfire:  I think the rules are different for a toddler, though?  I never had to face this particular issue, but I know my pediatrician said you can let toddlers cry for much longer periods of time than infants when dealing with sleep issues.

Post # 10
Member
6010 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

@MrsDPal811:  Well, you gotta do what’s best for your family, including weaning if it’s the right time.  🙂  I know with my kids (DD is 2, DS is 5 months), it seems to take them 3-7 days to adjust to a new routine.  Does that sound about right with your daughter?  The biggest issue will probably just be enforcing this new routine consistently.  You and your DH need to be on the same page about how/when you’re going to wean her because if you use two different approaches it’s just going to confuse her and delay the transition. 

ETA:  Maybe you can introduce a new comfort item (blanket, stuffed animal, etc…) to replace the attachment she has to your boobs?

Post # 11
Member
9630 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@Mrs. Spring:  That’s a good point, yes, toddlers can handle it much longer than infants.  Still, I’m a wimp when it comes to babies crying, lol. 

Post # 12
Member
6010 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

@Sunfire:  Ugh, me too.  My daughter threw an epic tantrum this morning that just broke my heart.  🙁

Post # 13
Member
65 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

My advice, wean slowing. The breast is a comfort to her and taking it away is going to be very upsetting to her. Does she nurse just at night or all throughout the day? Cut back slowing, replacing a nursing session with something else. “No mama milk right now, how about a snack? Would you like to play a game with Mommy instead?” It’s not going to be easy, but if you do want to wean her just stick with it.

At 16 months old my oldest was still very very attached to the breast.

Post # 14
Member
9630 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@MrsDPal811:  Btw, BIG HUGS to you, I know this stage is not easy! 

Post # 16
Member
471 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I sleep trained my kids early. I would let them cry for 3 minutes go in comfort, rub, pat, tell them it was time to sleep, leave the room. Then 4 minutes, Then 5 minutes. Usually always they fell asleep on their own by 20 minutes time. It took a few days of doing this. I don’t remember it taking more than a week to accomplish them going to bed quickly.

I didn’t breast feed my kids but have you tried laying her down with a shirt you have worn? If it is a security thing that may help. 

You will be thankful that they don’t need you to sleep when they are bigger. My friend still has to lay with her girls to sleep and they are 11, 8, and 7 and she always has a hard time getting them to sleep. Mine are 16, 7, and 2 and they all get told it’s time for bed and they all go without a fight. I also have a strict no watching TV to fall asleep rule as well. They have to sleep in a dark or dim room for their bodies to be prepared for restful sleep.

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