Does not registering = cash gift?

posted 3 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 3
Member
649 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

If a couple didn’t register or  I didn’t know where they were registered, I’d give cash.

We registered, but didn’t have a wedding website or the info in the invitation or anything, so most people gave cash. I don’t think they knew about it, unless they asked us or our parents.

Post # 4
Member
895 posts
Busy bee

Pretty much, yes. There are always a few exceptions for people who don’t normally like giving cash or gift cards but most people will.

Are you having a bridal shower?

Post # 6
Member
8592 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

Yes, or a gift card.

Post # 7
Member
10748 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2014

I would give cash, yep. But I do that anyways now. 

Post # 8
Member
7075 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

Generally it’s assumed you would prefer cash. If people ask about giving money you could always say “oh we’re really trying to save up for XXXX house upgrade” or whatever.

Post # 9
Member
3813 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Brookfield Zoo

Yeah I think generally it means cash is desired.  If you get asked again though, I think it would be perfectly acceptable to let your friends/relatives know that you will love whatever they give you, even if it is just their presence.

Post # 10
Member
351 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Yes, not registering is pretty clear and is really the only not rude way to specify that you prefer cash gifts. I understand you may not want to pressure your family friends and are not a big fan of gifting, registries seemed weird to me too, but most people will not want to come empty handed to your wedding. A registry helps them figure out something that you two would love! As a guest, I would rather buy you something you will keep and use then some random thing you end up returning.

Maybe make a small gift registry so you can at least help guide them? You could have it comprised of more inexpensive items, like under $50, if you are concerned. 

 

Post # 12
Member
3756 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

I’ve had two friends in the past year get married and not register. People just gave random gifts anyway. The first girl is a close friend and refused a bridal shower so a few friends and I took her out to brunch and had our own little informal shower. We got her wine and stuff which is nice because she likes wine. My other friend didn’t register but did not refuse a shower so one was thrown. Everyone bought her wine related gifts. Glasses, racks, bottles of it. I mean she likes wine but not THAT much! I gave her money because they just bought a house and were paying for the wedding themselves so I knew that was the best option. 

So basically, not registering doesn’t mean people will automatically give you money. People have this thing about wanting to give actual gifts and if they don’t know what you want, they’ll just guess!! 

FI have been living together for 2 years and I’ve been living on my own for over 10 years so I don’t necessarily NEED anything, but I know people will be asking and want to throw a shower so I plan to register for some upgrades. Everything we own is hand-me-downs!

Post # 13
Member
9137 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

We registered for a few items but that’s because I know many of my friends/family buf off-registry and not having a registry won’t guarantee cash.  Plus, the few people I told we hadn’t planned on registered pressured me to tell them what gifts we wanted because they don’t like to give cash.  We would love cash since we’re saving for our honeymoon but we will be thankful for what we get and get over it.

Post # 14
Member
7654 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

@elliptical2013:  We did a basket to hold cards, but you could do a card box. We didn’t register because we didn’t want or need anything. People assumed then we wanted/needed cash and either brought us that or giftcards (I actually really loved the gift cards). There were still people that brought gifts or nothing and honestly that was ok too.

Post # 15
Member
78 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

I think it’s fair to assume that if a couple doesn’t register that they would prefer cash. The same thing happened to me actually. We’re having a DW and decided not to register because our guests are already spending money on flights and hotels. One of my aunts asked my mom where we were registered and she explained our situation. My aunt said “well I’ll just send them a check!” (no complaints here!)

But then my MOH told me she would be throwing me a bridal shower, so I ended up registering at Target for some cute stuff for the house, but everything is under $50. 

Generally speaking, most people are going to want to give you a gift either way! Some prefer to give physical gifts and some prefer to give cash, it really just depends on what the norm is in your family/social circle…

Will you having a bridal shower?

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