Does taking time to think about being right together usually end in breaking up?

posted 2 years ago in Relationships
Post # 2
2062 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 1987


I just think that the pair of you are a couple whose relationship perhaps in theory shouldn’t work but in practice very definitely does.

This is cause for a celebration.  Vive la difference!  

However,  you both come with a lot of baggage in terms of fear of being hurt and it is this that is causing one of the two main problems.  The differences themselves aren’t the problem.  It is simply the fear of stepping out into the unknown and risking being hurt again.  

The thing is that if you both married similar people you would run exactly the same risks.  It just wouldn’t feel as though you were running the same risks.

The second main problem is your SO’s tendency to overworking.  I know that (as said in a previous thread) he would like to retire quite soon but in reality maybe he just needs to be more relaxed about it and spend more money for fun, preferably on you.

A decade ago I had a life threatening illness.  Since then I’ve not saved as much as I should but I have enjoyed life.  Chances for happiness don’t come along every day and who knows what will happen tomorrow so one should take chances and opportunities when they arise.

As the bard himself said:

Let me not the marriage of true minds admit impediments.

So why should two true-minded people not be together?

Post # 5
2062 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 1987

It sounds like you are actually very good for each other.

Post # 6
2702 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

twu123:  You actually can date forever if you like. I know of several couples that started dating in their forties, never married and are still together and very happy 20 years later. i don’t know why they chose not to marry but I am sure they had reasons.  I think it is different if there are children involved.

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