Post # 1
Today i went to my cake consultation, which i have been emailing back and forth for weeks about.. The people have been great over the phone, and made me feel like it was all under control etc..
At my appointment i was expected to leave a rather large deposit, so i was expecting to sit down and taste some of the flavour which i have already chosen, see what it looks like etc (cupcakes)..
Got to this place and ”oh no we arent doing that flavour today, we are going to show you ‘this’ one and ‘that’ one.”
I was like.. ” why am i here. I dont want to sit here and eat cake at 9 in the morning when im here to see MY cake that i have been speaking to you fools about! ” (didnt realy say that, all in my head)
Why did i feel like the woman was looking at me with terror like ‘whats this crazy bride going to say/do whoooa look out’
Are we not able to question these PROFESSIONALS or get a bit disapointed/ frustrated at times because we will instantly be crazy hormonal bridezillas?!
Post # 3
I totally feel like that. I’m definitely an opinionated person but have found myself holding back because I don’t want to be a bridezilla.
Post # 4
That would only count as a bridezilla moment if you flipped out and started screaming at them for that, I don’t think just being dissatisfied with their service itself is being a bridezilla.
I think it’s sort of like PMSing. If it’s close to “that time of the month” some people treat you like your crazy and hormonal if you act even the slightest bit dissatisfied with something.
Post # 5
That completely ridiculous. If they knew you were coming in for a tasting and they knew what flavors you were interested in, they absolutely should have made you a damn cake to try. Did you end up doing your tasting?
As for the original question, sometimes the stigma does stop me from saying whats on my mind only because EVERYONE (and I mean every member of my family and all of my friends) have made references to me being a Bridezilla. At first I laughed it off but now its just getting annoying. I feel like if I disagree with something or suggest an alternative they’re going to think I’m being a bridezilla. When I first announced our engagement on FB, I got a slew of congratulations but I also a handful of “Bridezilla” comments. WTF?!?
Post # 6
maybe cos i had that ‘im really not even going to bother smiling and pretending to be happy’ face on.
I cant even tell you the look on the womans face though. . I did feel like making a big deal, but more than anything i just felt like saying. ‘really?.. really like really this is happening’ .. haha
Post # 7
I’m a professional in my work life, and the wedding industry is a business. I treat it as such. I don’t feel badly for demanding to get what I pay for, but I make sure that happens in a calm, rational, and polite way. So no, I don’t feel like a bridezilla because I don’t act like a bridezilla. And if someone tried to make me think that I was a bridezilla for requiring I get professional services, I’d fire them.
Post # 8
I am actually a VERY laid back person and i mean my mum seemed happy enough eating the other flavours. We left the deposit and I am going back another hours drive when they have the flavour im choosing.. Im just planing on working on my passive agressive and see if i can make myself feel better when i have my next encounter.
Post # 9
No. I know what I want and don’t have time to waste with someone trying to convince me otherwise. I hate the term bridezilla-it’s someone using a cutsie word to call me a bitch. As much as wedding cost, I think I have every right to get what I want.
Post # 10
I hate the term bridezilla – And I DO think that it causes some of us to question how we handle certain situations. But I don’t feel like that’s necessarily a bad thing. I’m trying to kind of use it positively, as a way to make SURE I’m dealing well with people. 🙂 I do feel like it’s stupid though. My FFIL said, upon hearing about the engagement, “Oh no, you’re not going to be a bridezilla are you??” Um. I’m going to be myself, so we’ll see? Lol
About your situation – that’s ridiculous. They should have scheduled you to come in on a day that they HAD your flavour. Why would you want to try others if you had chosen another? That’s a bit stupid. But stupid things happen.
Post # 11
I think the stigma has made a lot of brides, myself included, feel like it’s difficult to just clearly express what we want and our dissatisfaction when things don’t match our expectations. Bridezilla is supposed to refer to a bride who reacts irrationally to things that don’t meet expectations. I definitely don’t think expecting good service, quality products/services and professionalism makes anyone a bridezilla, nor does voicing your concerns, opinions or dissatisfaction.
Post # 12
There is a vast difference between acting like a bridezilla and standing up for yourself and the service you should be getting as a paying customer. As other ladies have said, I’d not go into a temper tantrum over it, but I would be expressing my disappointment and dissatisfaction with the lack of customer service. As with ANY customer service business, they need feedback to understand where they are dropping the ball or what they are doing right. If they can’t take any kind of constructive criticism then they shouldn’t be in the business they are in.
Post # 13
OMG! This has completely been the case with me, but more with my family than with vendors.
I’m normally independent, but I turned into this awful people pleasing person, I’ve termed “codependa-bride,” for a while. Thankfully, I came to the realization that it’s better to be called a bridezilla than to be a doormat and started standing up for myself.
Post # 14
Absolutely. I’m scared to even ask my family for help for fear of them rolling their eyes and calling me a bridezilla. I’d like to make whoever made that word popular come and do all my escort cards for me 🙁
I tend to not worry so much about vendors because 1. I know I’m actually VERY reasonable and 2. I’m paying them an insane amount of money.
Post # 15
Oh I totally feel you. I am so hyper paranoid about being labeled a bridezilla I’m afraid to actually call any vendors out for being unprofessional. I was complaining to my FI the other day about the restaurant we’re going to have our rehearsal dinner at because the owner never gets back to me and when he does, consistently misspells my name (even though my name is on Every. Single. Email I send him) and argues with me over inconsequential things. FI totally pulled the bridezilla card (he really wants the dinner there and hates confrontation) to get me to just suck it up and deal with this fool’s shenanigans without complaint.
It worked. 🙁
Post # 16
I am not worried about being labelled a Bridezilla at all. I am not all that demanding, and the things I feel passionate about concerning my wedding, I provide detailed descriptions as well as pictures for reference so there is no room for misunderstandings. The things I feel REALLY passionate about, I am trying to do myself so I can’t get mad at anybody else if those things don’t turn out right =) I think I had more “bridezilla” moments planning my sister’s wedding than my own.