Post # 1
My fiance is a mama’s boy (and a “sister’s boy,” if there is such a thing), and I have found threads here about it. Seems I’m far from the only one at least. My question is that I wonder if they ever move on from it? Like when they move in with their fiance/wife and start a family?
I just want to hear from others, my fiance and I have been together for over a decade and do not live together yet. I have hope the dynamic will change upon living together and having kids. I know what I’m in for if it does not “change,” but I’d like to at least have some hope here lol
It can really drive me crazy sometimes. His family is a little loony which makes it only that much “better”!
Post # 3
What exactly makes him a mamas boy? because I think there are different variations of this. Does he need his moms approval for everything?
Post # 4
Well there’s a “mama’s boy” and then there’s a guy that’s good to his mother. A “mama’s boy” is not a good thing! I think some people call guys good to their mothers “mama’s boys” by mistake.
He definitely needs her approval, does any little thing she wants, he was brought up this way. And where we were serious so young she really sunk her claws into him good right from the beginning. She’s got him “by the balls,” so to speak. Needs her approval, does any little thing she asks, many times chooses her over me (like we have plans but she needs help swatting a fly)– does what a “mama’s boy” does!
Post # 5
Well, my brother used to call my mom for every little thing, and now he’s learned to just ask his wife. My husband on the other hand, will ask me what I think and then still call his parents.
Post # 7
Mine is like that (very super close with his mom and sister, they speak to each other about 5 times each day without fail) but after being on my own for the past decade- I don’t mind it. When he isn’t bothering his mother or sister, he is bothering me…. I would rather not be bothered as I do like my space at times.
Post # 8
I have a feeling that this will change once you are officially married. There’s something about that the forces a mother to back down a little. (there’s always the exception of course!) Once she sees that he is really committed to you, she will probably back off a little because you will be living together and you will be spending ALOT more time with each other…making decisions, starting a family etc. Men tend to focus on what’s in front of them, where as we are a little more complex than that.
Post # 9
It only changes if the guy, you FI, sees that being dependant on others outside of yours and his relationship is unhealthy.
DH WAS a momma’s boy BUT it came out of when he had cancer and his mom and sis could’ve lost him….they had to of course do everything for him & then there’s the attachment of not wanting to let go.. ultimately it still resulted in the same behaviour as the “traditional” mommas boy.
DH and I had a talk about being on the same page and same team… and that’s all that was needed. DH talked to his mom and anytime anything came up he affirmed his allegiance to me that he was marrying me, that I was his family now, and that his mom needed to understand that… he continues this conversation still today with her (it’s been going on through the entirity of our relationship, close to 2 years… wedding was 2 mths ago)
Post # 10
My fiance and I have lived together for a year and a half and he is still the yoda of mama’s boys. Now that use to bother me (dating 5yrs) not anymore, me and his mom are super close…..it helps if at first he disagrees with me and asks her to give him advice she tells him almost the samething I did.
We realize we are not in competition for his love and I love our close relationship therefore I can hardly complain about him being a mama’s boy